Do I invite him?

posted 2 years ago in Guests
Post # 16
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee

happybridetobe1988 :  I’m always in camp give her/him a plus one. It’s hard to celebrate someone else’s love when you are missing your love because he or she wasn’t invited. Try to ignore the affair/any info from the ex. You don’t know her side of the story and always give people the benefit of the doubt.  

Post # 17
Member
1768 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

Um,  I wouldn’t,  and even without hearing the other side of the story,  this would probably color my feelings about my friend.  IDK. 

I only have 1bf and 1gf of guests on my list,  fi is 38 and I’m 36, pretty much everyone we know is married and living with their spouse. 

Post # 18
Member
210 posts
Helper bee

I wouldn’t give a plus one. I don’t think anyone in my social group would be comfortable hanging out with the guy our friend had an affair with when we’re all used to socializing with her husband. And I’m not sure I’d want them there while celebrating my marriage when she forsake hers right after the honeymoon. Also I know a lot of people who are only giving plus ones to long term partners now so I would simply tell her he doesn’t qualify. (The time they were where seeing each other while she was married definitely wouldn’t count)

Post # 19
Member
748 posts
Busy bee

I wouldn’t invite her ex nor her new man. 

Post # 20
Member
908 posts
Busy bee

This all depends if the ex is also invited. If he was only your friend through her then don’t invite him.

As for your friend, just give her the plus one. At the end of the day its not your business to judge her situation. If you consider her a friend, just support her through this difficult time. 

But if her ex is also invited, then don’t allow any of them a plus one. Too much potential drama. 

Post # 21
Member
422 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think its fair that her husband is being cut-off because she decided to have an affair and end their marriage. If you like this man as a friend I would invite him, you get to choose whether you continue to have a relationship with him or not.

Post # 22
Member
6442 posts
Bee Keeper

Ignoring the fact that she had an affair on her husband, let’s focus on who you are inviting.

Are you inviting the former D-H and her? If you are inviting the former D-H, then don’t invite the new man. Who were you friends with first? The friend or the former D-H? If you have been friends with the former D-H for 11 years as well I say he has every right to be invited as well as she does but that doesn’t mean she is allowed to flaunt that in front of her ex husband.

If you aren’t inviting the former D-H allow her to bring her plus one. 

OR you could get crazy and give them both plus one’s – I wouldn’t recommend this one

 

ETA to remove the auto (dh)

 

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