(Closed) Do I invite my father to my wedding? Help

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
555 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It sounds like you need to weigh out will it kill you if you do or if you don’t invite him. My father passed away a few years ago but there’s no way I would have ever involved him in my wedding and that would have been akward for sure. (alcohol was a major factor involved in this issues as well) Yes maybe you’ll hurt his feelings but will it hurt yours and make your day miserable having him there? These are serious things that you have to search deep inside and figure out. Is there any part of you that wants him there? Is there anyway to tell him you want him there but only if he doesn’t drink? I’m sorry you have to deal with that! Good luck keep strong!

Post # 4
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

Unfortunately, this is a decision you are going to have to make on your own. I know the decision is a tough one because I also have similar issues with my father. I decided that it would be best for everyone if he did not come to my wedding, so I am not going to invite him. I am not going to tell him about the wedding either. For my situation, it is just better that way. You just need to weigh the good things with the bad things and make your decision from there.

Post # 5
Member
1074 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Well….It’s kind of hard to tell you what you should do because everyone is so different.  I’m one of those people that will move forward without looking back.  People make mistakes. 

 

How about you have a discussion with him?  Let him know how you feel about the situation.  I know it’s prob easier said than done, but you need to let him know how you feel about this.  Otherwise you’ll always have that white elephant in the room any time you’re with him.  Open up to him and perhaps he will actually realize how much he has hurt you in the past and will make a change.  If not permenant, atleast for the wedding, if you invite him

Post # 6
Member
1232 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I’m in an almost identical situation! My father isn’t invited.

Post # 8
Member
838 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

You said it “he has never been a father to me” so why the invite? I know it seems harsh but I know the feeling of not having your dad around, People ask me “are you inviting your dad?” and my answer is always “why would I?”  so you yourself have to weed out the pros and cons.

Post # 9
Member
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Honestly it sounds like you’ll be better off not inviting him. You did mention that he isn’t pleasant to be around. Just because someone is blood-related does not in any way obligate them to an invitation to your special life events. He had the opportunity to be a part of your life and chose not to on many occasions so he doesn’t deserve this honor now.

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