Post # 1
I have been reading some posts on here about paying for bridesmaids dresses, hair, makeup, ect…
I decided to add it all up, and including my bridesmaids buying me a gift for the shower and wedding, were looking at an upwards of 600 dollars
alterations if needed..guess maybe $50
hotel: $100 not necessary, but they are all going to want to have a good time and drink..so they will all be staying and riding the shuttle back to the hotel
Hair and makeup: $100
Gifts to my Fi and I: no idea
Guilty is how I am feeling..now at this point, they have already paid for their dresses..
I am not sure if three or none are coming to get ready with my hair and makeup artist..(no one responded to my email about it, and one already told me she prefers her own stylist)
They are getting alterations done separately where they live..
One has already booked the hotel…
How at this point do I help elevate cost..Can I give them a card with $100 and an explanation…or is that a terrible practice???
I have a small gift to give them after my bridal shower on Saturday…and I was planning on doing this then…unless it is bad etiquette..I am also worried about someone doing the whole…”Oh don’t be silly” thing and trying to hand it back to me…
Post # 3
I don’t think you’ll be able to just give them money. Most people realize that being a bridesmaid means paying some hefty bills. However, if you want to help them with the cost, you could just tell them that you’ll cover the hotel or hair/makeup. You could also just give them a big gift card to a store or restaurant you know they frequent. Just make sure not to expect them to buy anything that’s *really* expensive (like $200 shoes), and make sure they know just how much you appreciate them.
Post # 4
Usually you do up a thank you gift for your bridesmaids….I have seen brides do spa days for them, some do gift cards with another small gift like a candle or picture frame that they can place their photo of you and them from the wedding. If you do up a little gift bag and slip maybe a prepaid visa or other type of gift card….I dont think they would have a problem….I wouldnt just do the cash….that aways seems kinda informal….plus they could always find a way to stash the cash back into your purse or some other way when you are not looking!
I dont think its bad etiquette when its done properly!
I think they would be really touched by your gesture!
Post # 5
I would really love to cover hair and makeup..but one girl is for sure not going to have hers done with me..and the others have yet to respond…
They same girl who is not getting hair and makeup done with me..has also paid for her hotel room already..
How do I help her out when it comes to cost?
Post # 6
Honestly, I’d just bring it up outright. “I noticed how the expenses are adding up, and as a gift to my bridal party I’d really like to help if possible. Is there something I could cover as a way of saying thank you for being part of this awesome day?”
She’s your friend. I really don’t think she’ll be offended. And if she says, no, it’s ok, maybe get her a gift card to a place she loves and goes a lot (which would save her money later). I don’t see a problem with cash either, but sometimes when cash is mentioned people throw around the T word.
Post # 6
I dont think you should straight up give them cash and say sorry this is cosing to much. Most people understand that the dress and stuff will take up a small amount of change. B if you want to pay for the hotel, or for hair/mu, that would be nice. When I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man, I didn’t really add up cost, the only thing I really counted was the dress as ‘cost’, the rest of it was just fun to me anyways… weekend bachelorette party in NYC? Sure it cost a few hundred, but nothing I wouldnt do for a girls weekend away anyways… I didn’t see it “oh my god I have to spend so much on her” she was jsut a good excuse to have some fun!
Post # 7
Thanks! I hope my bridesmaids are thinking like you…
@atalante…if she is appreciative and receptive, then can I give her cash? She is the one who has already paid for everything…I thought I loved her for being so on top of things..but now I am not so sure
Post # 8
@Irishb: I agree with Pink Shoes, Instead of the money, take some of the cost away from them like the hotel, hair and makeup.
Post # 9
- Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium
@atalante: I pretty much did this.
I had a bridesmaid drop out, and I decided that with the money I would have spent (I’m paying for hair/makeup and part accomodations), I’m going to gift the other girls cash. They both said it wasn’t necessary, but one is a grad student, and the other is a mom of two… I wanted to ease the stress. They’ll get a small actual gift, as well.
Post # 10
In lieu of an actual bridesmaids gift I am giving each of my maids $80 to help offset the cost of the dress, and not asking them to get their hair/nails etc. done for the wedding. They’re all very pretty and do a good job grooming themselves. 😉
They are all happy with that, but I am very close with all of them and it works for us. I think giving them cash would be appreciated, especially in this economy. Good luck!
Post # 11
- Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens
I sent each girl $50 cash to help cover the cost of shoes and I’ll be giving them a gift at the bridal luncheon.