(Closed) Do I need to ask FI’s brothers’ wives to be bridesmaids?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

You can have whoever you want in your bridal party. Our Brother-In-Law was in our weddding, but my husband’s sister wasn’t.  She had no issue with it. I have never ever heard of putting a wife in the bridal party just so her husband walks down the aisle with her?? That seems ridiculous to me. They will only be walking for a minute or 2, and that’s it. Choose who you want,and don’t be pressured to do otherwise

Post # 4
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@maggierose: I would say do what you would like to do… There is no rule that says that they have to be in the wedding.

Post # 5
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Oh my gahhhhhdddd. I’m sorry but this is absurd. This is just someone wanting to put in their two cents to stir things up. Your BM’s and his GM’s walking down the aisle together is more a symbol of your two lives coming together than a show of men running around on their wives with bridesmaids. If guests jump to that conclusion and find it improper, then they watch too many soaps. Do what you want, and prepare for the next 9 months of people making silly demands of you for silly reasons.

Post # 6
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I don’t believe in asking people to stand up with you on your wedding day who don’t have an actual relationship with you. That job should be reserved for good friends/siblings/etc.

You don’t have to have anyone up there with you besides who you choose. Don’t feel obligated.

Post # 7
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@maggierose: I have a very similar situation where I found out that my FBIL’s girlfriend wants to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and Future Mother-In-Law thinks she should be one also.  And I don’t know her well.

The answer is do whatever YOU want.  I’m not sure about the cultural aspect for you, but people will get over it after a while.  Don’t put anyone in the bridal party unless you want them there.  I couldn’t imagine looking at my wedding photos and everytime feeling resentful of the Bridesmaid or Best Man that someone told me had to be in my wedding party…

Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Also wanted to add:  Can they do a reading or escort other family members down the aisle at the start of the ceremony?  These were some things I considered for FBIL’s girlfriend (but ultimately she will just have the role of ‘guest’).

Post # 9
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)

It’s your bridal party, and you should have whoever you want. If you’re not close to these girls or don’t feel comfortable asking them to be BMs, then don’t. And for the record, I have been to so many weddings where spouses walk down the aisle with other people. It’s just how it goes. 

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