(Closed) Do I need to buy my BM a gift?

posted 8 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
3762 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Thats completely up to you.  I always say at minimum you need to write a very nice thank you card to each girl. 

You have gotten them shoes and jewelry (although its for this day so it kinda doesn’t count).

Post # 4
Member
1927 posts
Buzzing bee

I agree the shoes and jewelry don’t count since they are for your wedding day.  I would get them something small at least.  Maybe a gift certificate for a nice dinner? 

Post # 5
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I wouldn’t feel pressured to do something for them if they’ve done not much for you.  I’m in this situation as well.  2 weeks from the wedding and I spent $30/each on them in gifts and they’ve done nothing to help me.  Yes they bought $200 dresses but i’ve received no parties thus I don’t feel obligated to thank them.

I think shoes & jewlery is fine.  A nice thank you card would be good.  Also they’re obvi included in the rehearsal dinner and maybe treat them to brunch or food the morning of the wedding.

Post # 7
Member
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think you need to get them something more.  I agree, the shoes and jewelry don’t count since they are for your wedding day, not truely gifts for your girls.  You don’t need to do something big, but you still ought to do something.

Even if they haven’t helped with projects/parties/etc, they’ve still provided emotional support to you.  My BMs didn’t “help” with a lot – I’m long distance from my wedding and they are all long distance from both me and the wedding.  And my cousin through my shower (again, long distance from my girls).  But they’re still always there for me emotionally, ready to listen to me vent or lend a helpful opinion.  Plus – things will get much more crazy right before your wedding and I’m sure they will help you through that busy last week / few days.

Post # 8
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

No, your friendship, light, and love should be plenty!

Post # 9
Member
617 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I think it’s a nice gesture but if it isn’t in your budget then don’t stress over it.  A nice lunch together or something like that is fine.  You don’t have to pay.  Also, I do agree with PP that a thank you note/card is important and necessary.

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