(Closed) Do I still send an invite?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
4044 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
cantwaittobeamrs:  I would send one anyway. What if plans change? September is a ways away. If I were you, when I sent it, I’d just acknowledge, “Hey I know you said you’d be out of the country but I wanted to send you a formal invite! 🙂 We’ll miss you!” 

Post # 3
Member
7414 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

View original reply
cantwaittobeamrs:  I would.  We sent invites to people who told us they couldn’t come (with the exception of one friend who told me in advance and specifically said she wanted to save us the expense of the invite & mailing).

Post # 4
Member
2221 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

I have a similar issue… one of our friends is going on a 2 month trip to europe and then moving to another state when they come back. I think they’ll be leaving around the same time I send invites and I know they’re going to be away. It seems weird to not send them one… but at this point I don’t think they’d even see the invite if I did send it. 

Post # 5
Member
2569 posts
Sugar bee

If they said they will be out of the country than no. I mean it can appear as you just want gifts and don’t care. Most will say send it anyways  but she clearly stated she won’t be here. Or you can send one just in case her plans change. Honestly going out of the country is expensive so i am sure her trip is well thought out so I’d still say no.

Post # 6
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2015 - a sculpture garden

The etiquette is to send an invitation to everyone you sent a STD to. It’s also so much easier than having to think about it. Whether they’ve already RSVPd or not, at least they have the STD & Invitation as keepsakes, as well as a little reminder of where you’re registered! 

Post # 8
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

View original reply
cantwaittobeamrs: Yes, etiquette says you send an invitation anyway. It would be rude to not follow a STD with an invitation. We have a friend who we sent a STD to, but he is a groomsmen in a wedding the same date as ours so he won’t be able to come to ours. We’re still sending him and his girlfriend an invitation anyway, even though I obviously don’t expect his plans to change. It’s the polite thing to do and conveys that, if circumstances were different, we’d like to celebrate with him. 

Post # 9
Member
1821 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I think you should still send it. 

Post # 10
Member
2221 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

View original reply
carolinabelle:  what if they’re going to be leaving for a long out of the country trip around the same time or before you’re sending your invites? My wedding is May 30th and I’m sending invites out the end of March\Early April. Close friends are leaving for a long European trip around the same time (going away party March 21st) and I know they’ll still be away for the wedding. They’re ending their house lease and moving to another state after their trip… so i’m not sure they’d ever even get the invite i send. 

Post # 11
Member
842 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception / Courtyard Marriott Legacy Ballroom

I think you should still send it. I have an out-of-town friend who already told me they probably won’t be able to make it, but they still want an invitation anyway We also plan on including special notes to those people who probably can’t make it so they know that we’ll miss them and hope to see them sometime soon.

Post # 12
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

View original reply
amberback: I’m not sure in that situation since it’s pretty unique…I guess I may hand deliver at the going away party and let them know you wish you could celebrate with them and you can’t wait to hear about their trip/celebrate your marriage after they’re back and settled. 

Post # 13
Member
7440 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I would, there have been several weddings I couldn’t attend because I traveled for work. I politely declined and said why, it was understood. I still appreciated the invite, that I was being thought of and sent a present and card. I would have had a difficult time knowing where to go without the information. Just because they cannot be there that day doesn’t mean they don’t want to celebrate with you. 

Post # 14
Bee
270 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Cottage on the Creek

we did send invites to people who said they couldnt come EXCEPT for Fiance has one friend who left 1/1 to live in south america for a year. he told us not to bother with international postage bc he knew he couldnt make it! we will skype him that day instead. 

Post # 15
Member
1849 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
amberback:  we have a similar issue – friends of ours are currently on a multi month backpacking trip and won’t return home until 10 days before our wedding. they’ve already told us they’re coming, but it’s useless to send them a paper invitation. so we’re scanning one, and sending them the pdf by email and asking them to rsvp by email to us. 

that way they still get the invitation and info it contains (website, hotels, shuttle etc) but we’re not wasting a 9.00 invitation that will sit at their house for 4 months unopened 🙂

The topic ‘Do I still send an invite?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors