(Closed) Do I suck at DIY? Or is my FMIL just a B****?

posted 13 years ago in DIY
Post # 47
Member
308 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2009 - Red Fish Grill

Those are FABULOUS!  I love the muslin bags!  You rock at DIY projects… don’t let anyone tell you any different!

Post # 48
Member
495 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think you should show her something that you DIY’d but don’t tell her you made it and see what she says. THEN tell her you made it and see how she reacts 😀

Post # 49
Member
4835 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Just wanted to echo that your stuff is totally gorgeous.  Your future mother in law is out to lunch, you’ve probablay just got to gring and bear it.  Nod and smilte at her ideas then go ahead and do whatever you want.

Totally inapprpriate of her to go over your head on the programs, but very gracious of you to go with it.  It’s not the cousin’s fault and it sounds like she (he?) is excited to be included.  And really, as much as we all like to DIY, sometimes it’s nice to have a little help?  So make sure to thank your mother in law for being so SWEET!  (A little bit of sarcasm there.)

To put a positive spin on it, now you know to not bother getting your Mother-In-Law anything hand crafted as a gift!  Clearly it’s not something she values.

 Good luck and great job with the lovely wedding crafts.

Post # 50
Member
3 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Just a word to the wise – I would nip this going over your head thing in the bud NOW.  You don’t want to spend your entire marriage with your Mother-In-Law going behind your back and doing stuff like that. It’s way out of line.  I’ve taken the honesty is best approach with my Future Mother-In-Law and it’s worked out quite well.  This may be because her and I are very similar and the fact I’ve known her for almost 8 years.  We fight like mom and daughter (and love each other just as much!), but I believe it’s much better to have it out there in the open than festering.

 Good luck!  I hope she quits this nonsense!

Post # 51
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Everything looks great from where I’m sitting. Perhaps jealousy is in the air? Sometimes people get jealous at someone else’s talent.

Post # 52
Member
1449 posts
Bumble bee

This has already said by everyone else but your DIY projects are fantastic!  Maybe your Future Mother-In-Law is very traditional in her ideas of what should be included in a wedding and who should do what?  Either way, Keep doing everything you had planned or you will be sad if you dont. 

Post # 53
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Are you kidding me?!!? Everything is awesome, if the cousin hasn’t started designing yet, maybe you can just tell her that you would like to design them yourself, or at least give her the design you made. I know she’s excited but it was taken away from you, so she’ll understand. I would seriously stop talking to Future Mother-In-Law 🙁

Post # 54
Member
1354 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Well, I was going to say they were nice even if they weren’t the best ever, because I appreciate hand-made things for their own sake, but, I don’t have to. Dude, your stuff is awesome!

I’m wondering if she is just the kind of person who thinks professional/expensive/branded is always better? Some people really think like that. Shame, cause if there is any event in life worthy of pouring your free time into personalizing, it is this! I am on the completely opposite end of the spectrum, I think stuff that is hand made is preferable to cookie cutter stuff.

Best of luck, and post anything else you do, please!

Post # 55
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Seriously, your stuff is AMAZING!  I think that woman needs to get off of her high horse and let you be.  

 P.S.  You can come DIY anything you want for my wedding 🙂 

Post # 56
Member
442 posts
Helper bee

I love your projects! I think they look beautiful. And if the cousin is a graphic designer, I think she would understand if you told her exactly what you wanted. As an artist, she should know how important it is to have your tastes acknowledged.

I wanted to make paper flowers for my wedding (amongst many other projects) and I catch a lot of crap from everyone over DIY, too. Traditionalists….what can ya do?

Post # 57
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I’d thank your cousin for her willingness to help you and then tell her that you had planned to DIY. Tell her how much you would appreciate her imput and advise and then invite her over to help. Nothing wrong with getting some trained helpers involved!

In the future when the bitchy Future Mother-In-Law has a comment or a question, smile and tell her you appreciate her concern but you’ve already taken care of it. And then refuse to discuss it further.

Honey, sometimes you have to start like you mean to finish. This is one of those times. You don’t have to be confrontational and go looking for a fight, but at the same time I think you have to stand up for yourself or this will be her pattern througout your marriage.

Good luck!

Post # 58
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I agree with what everyone has been saying: your diy efforts are amazing!  They really look great! I would BUY those favor bags- they looks so great!

I hope you take everyone’s advice and keep diying! Maybe your Future Mother-In-Law doesn’t see how the vision of everything will come together – I’m sure you’ll wow her when the actual day comes around. How can she not fall in love with all of your gorgeous details!?

Post # 59
Member
2181 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

They’re gorgeous! Don’t worry about what she tells you! 

I’m sorry about the programs…that sucks. Is there any way you could come up with another project for her to do and just explain that you were really looking forward to doing the programs yourself?

Post # 60
Member
2148 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I love these so much I may have to “borrow” a couple of your ideas when I start planning my little sister’s wedding next year. I especially like the fact that the ring pillow is not the traditional satin, white. My sister definitely has an edgy taste and the pillow you made would be perfect. I love everything.

Post # 61
Member
6 posts
Newbee

Love your DIY.  You have talent.  I love wordle!  MIL is a crabby b*&%. I agree with the person that said nip it in the bud.   

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