(Closed) Do most women have a good or bad pregnancy/child birth experience?

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 46
Member
217 posts
Helper bee

3 pregnancies, 3 easy peasy deliveries. My longest labor was the first one- 9 hours from 1st contraction to final push. No epidural for my second– labor was three hours and the recovery was really smooth with each one as well. 5 days after the birth of my last one, I was in a jump house celebrating the 4th bday of my oldest.

Post # 47
Member
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

I loved my pregnancy. Sure, of course I had symptoms, the worst for me were the nausea, bloating and reflux and I had a nasty taste in my mouth. The most “serious” issue I had was anemia but that was easy manageble. I just had to rest. I gained like 5 lbs total during my pregnancy, so after giving birth I looked better than ever, lol.

My labor and delivery was intense. I went from 5 cm to almost 10 in minutes and pushed for 25 minutes. It took 3 hours and 45 min to have my baby, from the first contraction till birth. I did not have any pain relief and my water broke on its own. I didn’t tear or have an episiotomy either. I walked to the toilet 30 minutes after giving birth and could go number 2 (tmi, sorry) the same day, so my recovery was fast. Here everybody who’s given birth gets a visit to start with pelvic excersizes and after 6 weeks you can go for more with a therapist. You get 9 sessions. That really helps prevent bladder issues.

Post # 48
Member
3823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

mandanjoe :  My pregnancy was fine. It’s pregnancy…you’re growing and carrying a whole person inside of you but your body knows what to do with all of that. All of those horror stories you mentioned are one off situations and sometimes, people have pre existing conditions that are exacerbated by pregnancy. Pregnancy gets annoying for everyone at the end. I did yoga from week 16 through week 39. That helped a lot with any aches and pains that most women experience. The only thing that I couldn’t avoide was hip pain towards the end. My body was getting ready for childbirth but it was bearable. I still went to work.

Childbirth was awesome. I had a natural childbirth and I labored for about 2 days. Labor is a gradual process and if you take classes and read books like Ina May’s book, you will be more than prepared for what to expect. The fear comes from not knowing. If you know, then you won’t fear it. It’s natural and not many women die from it. Holding back during labor is what increasing the pain…you have to let go and ride it out until baby is born. I arrived at the hospital at 2 pm and I pushed my daughter out in 4 pushes a little after 9:30 pm – no interventions.

Post # 49
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

bibbithebee :  That was very brave of you and I’m glad you shared!  <3

Post # 50
Member
2596 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2008 - County courthouse

I had a bad first pregnancy. I was really sick and could have died. I had late diagnosed diabetes and pre eclampsia. I had an emergency c-section at 37weeks. My second pregnancy was a healthy one. I also had a csection. I think that most pregnancis are good though. As long as u excersises and eat healthy.

Post # 51
Member
2123 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - DD born 2015 DS born 2017

After severe nausea until 17 weeks I had an easy pregnancy, birth, recovery and newborn period. I’m hoping to ttc #2 from next month and can’t wait!!

Post # 52
Member
2123 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2014 - DD born 2015 DS born 2017

TaurianDoll :  I had the same birth experience as you, I concur- it was awesome!!

Post # 53
Member
1249 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Recently pregnant, completely freaking exhausted so far and borderline terrified of the whole L&D process…bumping this thread for more comments!! 

Post # 54
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Two completely healthy, normal pregnancies, two textbook labor and deliveries.  There is some discomfort at some point in almost all pregnancies, I’m sure.  I’ve yet to experience anything in my pregnancies that has made me say “that’s it, I’m done, I can’t handle this again!”.  Honestly I enjoyed both of my pregnancies, even through the first trimester nausea and the third trimester feelings of being hncomfortable and tired.

If its labor pains you are afraid of; rest assured that thanks to modern medicine you can basically feel as little pain as you want to.  Contractions do hurt but I wouldn’t say they hit a 10 on the pain scale until your well into labor and at that point you can opt for paint relief.  Epidurals take away virtually all pain.  

 

Post # 55
Member
7002 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

Darling Husband and I are currently TTC and we’re the last of our group to have kids. Out of all my friends/family here’s what I’ve learned:

There’s so much information out there and mommy-shaming.  There’s this stigma these days you aren’t doing it right unless you’re weight lifting your entire pregnancy and having an unmedicated delivery with a midwife in a bathtub. Ok…maybe not that extream but you get my point. It’s almost like bragging rights over who did it “better”. All that being said – out of everyone I know with kids who attempted to do it “right”…..some had a great experience and others didn’t.

In the end you have to do what’s right for you. There’s no shame in a hospital birth, there’s no shame in a natural delivery, there’s no shame in getting drugs, and there’s no shame in having an elective c-section. There’s no shame in choosing forumula over breastfeeding…..and choosing to pump vs nurse doesn’t make you a cop out. (Trust me….I’ve literally heard all this shit from moms I know over the past couple of years. It’s insane!!!)

Everyone is different. For every person I know who had a miserable pregnancy I know another person who had a great one. I think for me one of the benefits of being in my 30’s and TTC is honestly not caring what people think or do. I don’t feel the pressure to make decisions based on what other people do or think, or based on their experiences.

Do I worry about birth and delivery? Heck yeah! I have low pain tolerance, I’m terrified of needles, and overall hate hospitals….so you can imagine labor isn’t high on my “things to do list”. BUT…I want to be a mom. I’m currently 3 blood tests in and getting better with needles each time.

Post # 56
Member
480 posts
Helper bee

“Elective” C-section? Hmm, I didn’t know that one could bear children that way by choice. We really do learn something new everyday. In any case, to answer the OP’s concerns, I had three natural childbirths . . . Each were similar in some ways, different in others.

1) The first one was the most intense because I didn’t really know if my timing was right. While waiting to be examined at the hospital, my husband asked me what if they discovered I “wasn’t really in labor, and sent me back home?” I replied they would have to drag me out the door, as I was in too much discomfort to go anywhere. I had the worst backache I ever had in my life and pleaded with him to massage my lower back non-stop. He finally told me there would be no skin left on my back if he continued any longer. When I was finally examined, I was dilated 8 centimeters (birth happens at 10). I gave birth to my first daughter shortly after.

2) I had a great team of women doctors with child #2, another daughter. I was hoping my own doctor would be out fishing that day, as he had begun to annoy me towards the end of my pregnancy (another story in itself). As my child was emerging, my doctor did show up and told one of the other doctors that he would do an episiotomy right about now. While the two were arguing, I tore (minor). The 2nd woman doctor who was an intern (this was her first delivery) told me I just had a natural episiotomy. I didn’t feel it. But while my baby was emerging, I could feel my breasts begin to lactate. This had not occurred with the first or third child, so was unique in that regard.

3) This time, a boy. As with both daughters, I was lucky not to experience any morning sickness. However, just prior to birth, he was facing the wrong direction (not breach). This time, my doctor was the son of a Jamaican mid-wife. He had accompanied his mother during his youth, so had witnessed many childbirths long before becoming a doctor. Instead of experiencing an emergency, the doctor was able to put his hand into my vagina and rotate my son. He also removed a few cysts he found on my cervix. Again, I felt nothing. And again, all was done without anesthesia.

For one who has not yet experienced childbirth, it can be very frightening. So something I want to emphasize is that the “pain” (I’d prefer to call it extreme pressure) occurs only during the uterine contractions which expel the baby JUST BEFORE IT’S BORN. The stretching of the vagina is not what causes the discomfort, which may seem counter-intuitive. The vagina is designed to stretch a LOT, so don’t let concerns about that be a deterrent.

Yes, one can experience unexpected complications on occasion. But there is a medical staff, expert in just about everything that can possibly go wrong, standing by. About the only long-term adverse side affect I experienced was weight gain. But I was underweight in all instances to begin with, so even that didn’t occur until much later.

Post # 57
Member
2813 posts
Sugar bee

quantumleap48 :  Elective C-Section is definetly a thing. Maybe not so main stream in US (more for dr’s not wanting to take liability or because insurance will not cover it), but in Europe it is pretty common – that way it is scheduled in advance and done in a controlled environment.

Post # 58
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I had a great pregnancy and long but smooth delivery.  My second pregnancy ended in an ectopic and was scary, but I was fine.  We have modern medicine, so I wouldn’t worry about pain or dying.  If you have a concern, call the doctor.  That is what they are there for.

 

I’d love to adopt, but it is so expensive and its not like you get a discount on the child’s care costs to balance it out.  I can’t imagine laying out an extra 30-40k for a kid on top of all the other expenses.  I wish they could figure out another way.

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