I think what you may feel as a child growing up will change as you get older and can recognize the circumstances of how things changed because of your birth order. Of course the first is always the ‘practice child’, as there’s really no manual on exactly the right and wrong way to do things when raising children. This site is a perfect example of that. People ask just about every day how to do things from breastfeeding to swaddling, and there’as a million different answers. When you become a parent, you take parts of what you remember from how you were raised, listen to what lots of random people tell you, call your Mom and best friend a lot, and talk to your neighbors~is there any wonder no one person could write something that would encompass everyone’s questions and have any one perfect way to do anything?
With the oldest, that’s where the most mistakes are made, and also when all the ground rules are set. If it works, great. If not, and more kids are born, you try something else and hope for the best. The entire dynamic of a family changes once more people are added, as each needs to fit into a pretty complex puzzle. Personalities will play a major role in everything, and of course it’s easier to be around a happy and pleasant child than it is a temper tantrum throwing miserable one. My youngest was a brat, but it doesn’t mean I loved her any less.
The oldest in my family was my brother, and my Mom always acted like he could walk on water. My 10 year old brain recognized that, but my 20 year old brain resented it. Now it means nothing, but I still remember how it used to feel.
The youngest is my one sister, who was and is still a brat! She was a whiney, fresh, throw herself all over the house kind of kid who I thought got away with murder, because and someone else has mentioned, she was born prematurely and was pretty sick for the first 6 months of her life. Was that why they treated her differently or was it just because she was the last one?
What we see and feel as kids isn’t necessarily what really IS. Lots of us went through having to work to buy our own cars,especially if we were close to the oldest (I was #2), but the next 2 got them from my brother and my parents. We were working already, so my parents had more money to spend on the younger ones. That wasn’t hard to figure out, but we didn’t like it. That was a perk of being at the bottom of the birth order….your parents suddenly have more disposable income.
Being a parent is tough.