Post # 1
Just wondering … I’ve been to six weddings over the past three years. Of those, I got two thank you notes. Do people not send them anymore? Is a gift simply expected?
Out of the four where I did not receive thank-yous, two of them were my best friends. One of them thanked me verbally at least three times and told me how much she appreciated my gift, so maybe that was enough. My other best friend, for whom I was Maid/Matron of Honor, never even acknowledged my (very expensive) gift!!
WTF is up with that? When I get married, I will be writing my thank you notes no later than 3 months post-wedding!
Post # 3
Ive been wondering this too. We attended a wedding in July that was about 5 hours away and we spent over $200 on their gift from their registry and have not recieved even a verbal thank you since. I will be filling out our thank yous when opening presents 🙂
Post # 4
No, they’re definitely still expected by most people. If I don’t get a thank you note for a shower/wedding/baby shower/housewarming I definitely remember when planning future gift purchases.
Post # 5
I typically receive thank-you’s for wedding gifts. I think it’s rude of people not to send them.
Post # 6
If I am not thanked for a gift, I do not give others, or give a much scaled down version. I would hate to burden my loved ones with gifts that are clearly not appreciated. It would be most inconvinient for them to have to throw out or return anything I would give them in the future.
Post # 7
Yeah that’s annoying. I don’t give anything additional to the couple if I don’t get a thank you note. It’s ridiculous but I just don’t think your wedding is the first time you should be cranking those out. I made my nieces(who I raised) write those to everyone. Not those dumb …. THANKYOU FOR YOUR GIFT OF _______. A real almost letter. I don’t think anyone’s parents do that anymore.
I know when I ship gifts to people out of state, I AM the one that has to call to make sure they received it, not a call to thank me for the gift. People are forgetting etiquette was created for a reason.
Post # 8
I think that if a person comes to your wedding, purchases a gift, hotel room, etc than the least the couple can do is thank that person for their presence on at the wedding and the present they gave. Brides and grooms spend months planning, would it kill them to sit down and write a personal card to the people who mean the most to them and who shared in their day? I agree it is annoying and rude that people do not see this as important anymore.
Post # 9
I usually get them. I think. They’re nice to receive but I don’t care if I don’t, and I certainly don’t keep track of who has and hasn’t sent me a thank you.
They give a meal/party and I give a gift, so we’re sort of “even” anyway.
Post # 10
I expect a thank you not to come within 2-3 months, however I try not to get too upset if it doesn’t. It’s not like I’ve never put anything off. Doesn’t mean it’s not rude though. People spend a lot of money on attending weddings, they should be thanked for their gifts.
Post # 11
@paula1248: that’s a very good point! Maybe I should start sending thank you notes to the couple after I attend their wedding! Ha ha 😀
Post # 12
From the three weddings I attended in the past 2 years, I’ve received no thank you notes/verbal thank you. One of the three weddings was a family friend. My father received a thank note, but I did not (I do not live with my father and I purchased a separate present).
When I get married, I will be sending out thank you notes….just how I was brought up.
Post # 13
@cbgg: Technically, a guest should be sending their hosts a bread and butter note. They are meant to, but it doesn’t happen often.
Post # 14
I have wondered the same thing. I went to a wedding over a year ago and never received a thank you of any sort for my gift. I finally worked my present into a conversation just to make sure they actually got it (which they did). Rude!
Post # 15
I made it a point to be prompt on my thank you cards. For my engagement party and bridal shower I had my thank you cards in the mail the following week.
I know I won’t get them out as quickly after the wedding since we will be on our honeymoon for a week a day after the wedding, but my goal is to have them hand written and mailed out three weeks after the wedding.
Its really important and easy to send a thank you card, and people really do appreciate it!
Post # 16
My friend got married 7 months ago and no TK card. All of the people at the wedding talk about how rude it is.