(Closed) Do people not send thank you notes anymore?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Ive been wondering this too. We attended a wedding in July that was about 5 hours away and we spent over $200 on their gift from their registry and have not recieved even a verbal thank you since.  I will be filling out our thank yous when opening presents 🙂

Post # 4
Member
9053 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

No, they’re definitely still expected by most people.  If I don’t get a thank you note for a shower/wedding/baby shower/housewarming I definitely remember when planning future gift purchases. 

Post # 5
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1999

I typically receive thank-you’s for wedding gifts. I think it’s rude of people not to send them. 

Post # 6
Member
3267 posts
Sugar bee

@SapphireSun:  +1.

 

If I am not thanked for a gift, I do not give others, or give a much scaled down version.  I would hate to burden my loved ones with gifts that are clearly not appreciated.  It would be most inconvinient for them to have to throw out or return anything I would give them in the future.

Post # 7
Member
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

Yeah that’s annoying.  I don’t give anything additional to the couple if I don’t get a thank you note.  It’s ridiculous but I just don’t think your wedding is the first time you should be cranking those out.  I made my nieces(who I raised) write those to everyone.  Not those dumb …. THANKYOU FOR YOUR GIFT OF _______.  A real almost letter.  I don’t think anyone’s parents do that anymore.

I know when I ship gifts to people out of state, I AM the one that has to call to make sure they received it, not a call to thank me for the gift.  People are forgetting etiquette was created for a reason.

Post # 8
Member
1257 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think that if a person comes to your wedding, purchases a gift, hotel room, etc than the least the couple can do is thank that person for their presence on at the wedding and the present they gave. Brides and grooms spend months planning, would it kill them to sit down and write a personal card to the people who mean the most to them and who shared in  their day? I agree it is annoying and rude that people do not see this as important anymore.

Post # 9
Member
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I usually get them. I think. They’re nice to receive but I don’t care if I don’t, and I certainly don’t keep track of who has and hasn’t sent me a thank you.

They give a meal/party and I give a gift, so we’re sort of “even” anyway.

Post # 10
Member
5950 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I expect a thank you not to come within 2-3 months, however I try not to get too upset if it doesn’t.  It’s not like I’ve never put anything off.  Doesn’t mean it’s not rude though.  People spend a lot of money on attending weddings, they should be thanked for their gifts.  

Post # 11
Member
5950 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@paula1248:  that’s a very good point!  Maybe I should start sending thank you notes to the couple after I attend their wedding!  Ha ha 😀

Post # 12
Member
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

From the three weddings I attended in the past 2 years, I’ve received no thank you notes/verbal thank you. One of the three weddings was a family friend. My father received a thank note, but I did not (I do not live with my father and I purchased a separate present).

When I get married, I will be sending out thank you notes….just how I was brought up.

Post # 13
Member
3267 posts
Sugar bee

@cbgg:  Technically, a guest should be sending their hosts a bread and butter note.  They are meant to, but it doesn’t happen often.

Post # 14
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I have wondered the same thing.  I went to a wedding over a year ago and never received a thank you of any sort for my gift.  I finally worked my present into a conversation just to make sure they actually got it (which they did).  Rude!

Post # 15
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I made it a point to be prompt on my thank you cards. For my engagement party and bridal shower I had my thank you cards in the mail the following week.

I know I won’t get them out as quickly after the wedding since we will be on our honeymoon for a week a day after the wedding, but my goal is to have them hand written and mailed out three weeks after the wedding.

Its really important and easy to send a thank you card, and people really do appreciate it!

Post # 16
Member
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

My friend got married 7 months ago and no TK card. All of the people at the wedding talk about how rude it is.

The topic ‘Do people not send thank you notes anymore?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors