(Closed) Do SO's go to rehearsal at venue?

posted 5 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
Member
1336 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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Sara1923:  SO’s aren’t going to WANT to go to the rehearsal.  Though they may tag along just because of driving logistics, if they’re attending the dinner following then they might sit through the rehearsal first.  I think all SO’s were at my rehearsal because they were going to the dinner.  I’m not sure why it matters?  They don’t want to be there, they just sit through it in back till it’s over.    

Post # 3
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think that’s really weird and I would see shut it down. 

 

To my knowledge we won’t have any SOs at the rehearsal, but have invited them to the dinner. 

Post # 4
Member
848 posts
Busy bee

My husband was in a wedding a few months ago- he went to the rehersal at the venue alone- then came home changed and we went to the rehersal dinner together. From looking at the photos from the rehersal no one had any guests with them. The venue rehersal is just for the people in the wedding.

On the day of the wedding we stayed at the hotel where the wedding was being held. We arrived together- got checked in hung out a bit- walked around the hotel- talked to some other wedding guests that were checking in. Then he left to go hang out with the boys and do their getting ready stuff. I stayed in the room and got ready and went to the wedding with some of the other wives who’s husbands were in the wedding. I didn’t really link back up with my husband until the reception- he was doing wedding party stuff.

Your bridesmaid needs to tell her SO that he needs to just see her when he sees her- she has stuff to do and he’s not invited!

Post # 5
Member
1576 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Some SO’s were at my rehearsal because they were invited to the rehearsal dinner (directly after) and y’know – they live together – so they came in one car cuz that’s easier. They were probably super bored, but it didn’t bother me any. Our rehearsal dinner venue (a little bitty restaurant) did not have a bar or lounge or anything, so it’s not like they could have dropped of their SOs at the restaurant while we were all at the rehearsal. But if yours does, that might be a good way to ditch them. Probably more fun for them too.

The BF at the salon is not cool, IMO. That’s girl time. But if it’s a matter of transportation logistics and you don’t offer any help, you may just need to put up with it. Not everyone owns their own car.

Post # 6
Member
498 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

The rehersal is usually bridal party only, and parents. I have been to a few where some SO were there, but it was mostly if they were family members or an out of towner or two who had no where else they could be. The big show is the wedding, I wouldn’t want all my guests getting a sneak preview. 

Post # 7
Member
47448 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think it is fine to ask SO’s to join the group after the rehearsal. There may be some couples who have transportation issues,so be prepared for some flexibility on that. If the SO is prepared to sit quietly or go for a walk during the rehearsal, you shoudl be able to cope with their presence.

As far as the salon and the bridal party getting ready, I would tell the friend that her BF hanging out is just not on the agenda.

 

Post # 8
Member
832 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2015 - Family Farm

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Sara1923:  Only Time I have seen SO’s at the rehearsal is when they have travelled for the wedding.

Post # 9
Member
1727 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

They did at our rehearsal because the dinner and the rehearsal were in the same place. 

Post # 10
Member
670 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We had SOs at our rehearsal because we did dinner right after. It made it easier than people having to go pick up their SOs. Why would this guy come to the salon, that is weird, I would say no he isn’t allowed, that will make it awkward for the whole bridal party.

Post # 11
Member
584 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

My best friend got married last summer, and my SO came to the rehearsal before dinner. He also was there when we were getting ready, although he most just helped with venue set up and grabbing things for people. He can’t drive due to his disability, and I would be really hurt (and honestly, probably not even bother to go to the dinner itself) if our friend was mad he was going to be at the rehearsal. He also would have waited in the car at the salon, as that is not a situation I see him enjoying haha

Post # 12
Member
1565 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I was the SO at a wedding and I tagged along for the rehearsal because my Fiance were from out of town and were sharing a car while staying about 25 minutes from the venue. The other SOs were there too, so we sat in the back of the church and made small talk while the boring stuff was happening. Then we all went to the rehearsal dinner. The day of the wedding, however, he and the groom and other groomsmen went off on their own to do whatever it is dudes do before a wedding. One of the groomsmen went out of his way to pick him up so I could have to car to get myself to the wedding later that day. Is it about car logistics for your bridesmaid? I would have felt really awkward imposing on their guys’ lunch and sitting there while they all got dressed in their suits, so I’m glad someone was able to drive my Fiance.

Post # 13
Member
1039 posts
Bumble bee

Unless you’re attending an out of town wedding or the rehearsal and dinner are in the same location and the couple trevaled together, there’s really no reason why the SOs would event want to be at the rehearsal.

Your friend bringing her bf to the hair and make up the morning of the wedding is ridiculous. No one cares whether he minds..it’s about whether you mind. For the sake of the rest of your bridal party and their privacy and ability get ready in peace and without having a dude in the midst, I think you should tell her he can’t be there.

Post # 14
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

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Sara1923:  Our ceremony coordinator specifically told us not to have SO’s or anyone who isn’t actually in the ceremony come to the rehearsal. It’ll just make everything take longer. Our bridal party’s SO’s are meeting us at the dinner.

Post # 14
Member
9101 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

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Sara1923:  I think it should be up to them. It might be a hassle to have to drive separately or have the SO drop someone off then find somewhere else to loiter at for an hour. I’ve been to a couple rehearsals and SOs were there. They were adults so didn’t cause any distractions or bother. Then again, if it’s more convenient for only the bridal party member to go, and the SO to meet up with you all at the dinner, that should be fine too. Doesn’t seem like anything worth stressing over. I’d invite them to both and let them work out what makes sense for them.

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