(Closed) Do we ask our attendants to make a toast?

posted 7 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
4583 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I thought traditionally the Maid/Matron of Honor and Best Man each gives a toast…

Post # 4
Member
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ

The Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man are traditionally supposed to give the speech, but I would honestly ask them beforehand or ask SOMEONE who is a good speaker (member of the family) to say something or have something ready BEFORE the day of.

This is awful, but when I was 20, I was Maid/Matron of Honor to my BFF and had no idea about wedding etiquette. When the DJ announced speeches, the room was silent (bunch of introverts). Finally the Bridesmaid or Best Man stood up and said something. I felt awful later when I found out I was supposed to have said something or had something ready to say.

Post # 6
Member
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ

@Melini: Can you ask a family member to be a backup? Like, hey, dad, when we do speeches, if no one stands up right away, can you say something? That way it’s not super awkward if no one stands up. Seriously, it was over 10 years ago, and I still remember it…like crickets chirping in a giant hall full of silent people.

Post # 7
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I asked my best friend to give a toast (she wasn’t in the wedding). My brother and sister in law were the Bridesmaid or Best Man and Maid/Matron of Honor and they didn’t really want to do it. Besides, my best friend was the person at the whole wedding who knew me and my hubby (none of his family came to the wedding).

Post # 8
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would just mention to them that it’s traditional for the Maid/Matron of Honor and best man to make speeches and ask if they would be comfortable. 

Post # 9
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m not sure if you’re supposed to ask people to give a toast or not.. But you could bring it up with your Maid/Matron of Honor, Best Man, Dad, and Fi’s Dad as “wondering if they were planning on giving a toast” for scheduling purposes…

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