(Closed) Do we invite these guests?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Do we invite these guests? (please also state your thoughts)
    Yes and we should keep our promise to make James best man : (1 votes)
    5 %
    Yes the should be invited, although James should only be a groomsmen : (2 votes)
    9 %
    Yes but only as a guest : (10 votes)
    45 %
    No, this guy should not be a guest at the wedding. : (9 votes)
    41 %
  • Post # 3
    3303 posts
    Sugar bee

    Invite him, plain and simple, because that is what your fiancé wants.

    Post # 4
    255 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    Why do you want to stay friends with these people? Really? I say go with your gut instinct. If you have any doubts they will ruin your wedding then strike their names off that list!

    Post # 5
    1471 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    you should have run from him a long time ago and ended the friendship, but i guess the friendship is manily with your Fiance, def dont have him in the wedding party but you will really have to talk to your Fiance about why you do not want him at the wedding and be honest and tell him why you feel uncomfortable about it

    Post # 6
    1041 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Does your Fiance agree that James is likely to make a scene at the wedding? Could he talk to him about it, make sure he “behaves”? If he sees where you’re coming from, perhaps it’s best not to compromise your day (both yours and your FI’s). Other than that, if your Fiance feels truly close to him and actually still wants him to be the best man without worrying about the risk that he’ll act out, I’d say maybe let your Fiance do what makes him happy. I don’t think it’s about keeping promises, though, because if your Fiance doesn’t really want him as his best man anymore, well, things change and that’s perfectly normal. Other than speeches, I don’t imagine you’ll even notice or care what James does at your wedding because you will be in your own special bubble with your new husband.

    Really hope you manage to resolve this either way 🙂

    Post # 7
    7609 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    I feel like you might be overreacting….like, a lot.  Is it possible that you’re so upset by everything James says and does because of how you feel about him (not liking him)?  Some of the things you’ve shared about his behaviour really don’t seem that terrible to me.  I feel like a lot of this could be resolved if you just cared less about the things he says and does and just go on with your life instead of getting worked up about it.

    May I ask how old you guys are?

    If your fiance really wants James there after you’ve discussed how much you don’t want him there, maybe you could invite him but try to care a bit less about what James says, thinks, and does?


    Post # 8
    399 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Stay out of it!! Your man gets to decide who his best man is not you. He’s you man’s best friend of 15 years if he wants him there then yes you have to invite him.

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