Post # 17
@Sea_bass: My Fiance has a lot ideologies that are very important to him. For example, he wants most things in our wedding to be local (flowers, food, etc) so as to have a small carbon footprint. I love this about him.
The reason about adopting is because of all the many children in this world without loving families. He feels that the love would be the same regardless, and he feels like it would be very selfish to bring several kids into world knowing that there are so many out there with no families.
I am very open to the idea (otherwise I would not be marrying him). We both said that we were going to talk about the adoption issue once we have our first kid.
Post # 18
We kind of agree. He thinks 2-3 and I think 3-4. So I have a feeling we’ll end up with 3!
Post # 19
- Wedding: June 2012 - Franklin Plaza
Nope! He wants 2 and I want 3. I think I am going to lose this battle. 😀
Post # 20
We both think 2 would be ideal, but both are open to the idea of a third if the first two are the same gender (I want a girl and he wants a boy lol).
Post # 21
@MsBlackberry: Wow! I have never “met” anyone in the same boat as me. And I feel exactly the same about this!! I fear that the adoptive children may not feel like they belong because we had a biological kid first! He knows my fears, which is why we decided to talk about it after the first one is born (in a few years). I have always loved the idea of adopting though 🙂 And thankfully my mom is a child psychologist, so I know she could always help us with any issues!
Post # 22
I want no more than two. He would be okay with 3-4. However, he’s always said that it’s the woman’s choice because she’s the one who has to carry it. Of course, that was said about someone who is not me and who would not be carrying his child. We’ll see how he feels about it when he has more of a dog in the fight. Of course, he knows that he’ll be the one staying at home with them too.
Post # 23
I love the two-parent, two-child family, and that’s what I’ve always envisioned for myself.
My husband seems to want THREE children. Now, I would welcome and love a third child if #2 and #3 came as, say, twins. 🙂 But other than that, I said we’ll see how I feel after two. I’m already 31 and we haven’t even started trying.
Post # 24
I wanted 4. He wanted 1. After a lot of pre-engagement discussions, we compromised on 2-3 AND a dog. LOL.
Post # 25
- Wedding: June 2012 - Franklin Plaza
@ohmybears48: Bahaha. I like the way you negotiate!
Post # 26
Kindof… he wants 3 and I want 5! 🙂 I’m not too terribly concerned about the money aspect… Paying for daycare will be a b****, but we both grew up super poor, so we know how to be frugal.
Post # 27
We are both of the mind that one child might be quite enough for us… or it might not! 2 is definitely the max for both of us, though. 🙂 I think we are more split on how far apart to have them.. we both think that having 2 in day care would be incredibly difficult, but I’d like to be done with babies by the time I’m 30 (I’m 25 now and TTC). SO, we’ll just see how it goes!
Post # 28
If money, childcare and fertility were no obstacle he wants 1-2 and I want 2-4. I’m of the firm opinion that intelligent people should try to have (or adopt) more kids, as it seems to be mostly the work-shy and educationally unwilling who have larger families here.
Post # 29
He is dead set on like 5-6. I say 4 and that is IF they are all well behaved. I am happy just taking it 1 by 1 and playing it by ear. We’ll see….I’m not concerned. Life is unpredictable and i’m not overly concerned with something that is so much in the future.
Post # 30
@dramabean: I wanted to be done with childbearing by 30 too…. Erm I 28 and want 3/4 kids… Somehow I dont see that happening some how…
Post # 31
We agree that we want 1 child, 2 MAX.