(Closed) Do you and/or your FI/spouse keep in touch with exes?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 77
Member
561 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I dated a fair bit in high school, college and then university.  I’m not in contact with any of exes except one.  Him and I got together for about 3 months in uni after hitting it off as mates.  The chemistry just wasn’t there and there was the small issue of me being gay which probably didnt help things along.  He was the only guy who I have dated who didnt take it as apersonal insult when I came out as gay.  He was super supportive and we have remained friends.  I dont see him very often as he moved away after graduation but if hes ever in town we meet for a drink. 

The rest of my exes are exes for a reason and I’d be glad to never see any of them again. 

Post # 78
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I could contact some of my ex boyfriends because I’m friends w them on facebook, but I don’t!! It would make me feel uncomfortable. Neither of us talk to exes!

Post # 79
Member
4605 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I do but FH doesn’t. The only ex I keep in touch with was someone that I’d been friends with before but dating just didn’t work out. FH doesn’t talk to his exes for various reasons, the last ex being because she basically begged him to have sex with her after we started dating. 

Post # 80
Member
9823 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Not really…for either of us.  People I dated for a significant length…I don’t really ever see or talk to (maybe once every year or two, as I have some mutual friends with some of them). 

I think he has one ex that once in a while texts him, but it was harmless stuff such as “ran into your brother” etc.

Post # 81
Member
509 posts
Busy bee

I still stay in touch with my ex-husband and have done so for the past 14 years because we were committed to co-parenting our two kids.  Do I hang out with him? Nope, but we do occasionally do each other favours.  Just because he wasn’t a good husband to me doesn’t mean that I have to hate him for the rest of my life.

Post # 82
Member
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I have a son with my ex-husband so we still talk and I consider him a friend. My other exes I run into socially and I speak but there’s nothing to talk about anymore so we keep it moving. Before me, my hubby dated a girl off and on for 7 years but she died early into our relationship. He’s Facebook friends with some girls he dated in junior high. I think it’s cute. Laughing

Post # 83
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

We do, becuase all our exes shared our hobbies and we live in such a small city we couldn’t keep our hobbies up without running into eachother. He has one ex who he is actually friends with, the rest and mine are only aquaintances really. 

Post # 84
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee

I’m in touch with one of my exes from highschool, we broke up 6 years ago! But my most recent ex refuses to talk to me. He became a wreck when we broke up, so he felt it was best. I’m always willing to be friendly! He keeps in touch with his most recent ex, and she’s a nice gal, we’re fb friends haha.

Post # 85
Member
504 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

No, neither one of us does. 

Post # 86
Member
578 posts
Busy bee

nope! the thing is, exes are exes for a REASON. 😉 you can be friendly when you bump into eachother, but definitely not call eachother or hang out. they are past relationships and should be in the past. if either of us had more casual relationships from back in high school or something, then that would not bother either one of us if they were mutual friends with us. its the serious relationships that i’m talking about

Post # 87
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Absolutely not. Occasionally we will receive a random message on FB here or there. However,  we make it very clear that we do not desire to have any association with them (mostly because our exes are psychologically disturbed or just like to instigate drama). So A BIG NO THANK YOU! 

Post # 88
Member
676 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

For both of us our best friends are both people we have technically dated in the past. On top of that I have quite a few exs that I keep in contact with because quite simply I have known them for years. We were friends before we dated so just because a romantic relationship didn’t work doesn’t mean our friendship should be null and void. As for Fiance he hasn’t had a lot of relationships but as far as I know he is still on good terms with all of his exs except one and she was the one he was with the longest, she cheated, lots of bs etc. I am the same I am friends with pretty much all of mine except of course my abusive ex husband whom I would be happy to never hear from again.

I think it is different for every couple and every person though. Not everyone can be comfortable with their SO being close with or hanging out with someone they know they have had romantic feelings for at some point. Nor does everyone want to be friends with their ex. Realistically not every relationship starts as a friendship and once the romantic relationship is over there is no other reason to keep contact with that person. And for some situations it just ended badly.

I can see both sides of it. So I don’t think it is really a bad thing either way, it works for some people not everyone.

Post # 89
Member
168 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

We both do! I don’t talk much to my ex, but we def do when he’s back in town ( they’re from the same place) and his ex is a close friend of mine now and she dates one of our groomsmen 🙂 

Post # 90
Member
794 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I used to. I broke off all contact with him this summer, though. It’s for the best. My guy still has a couple of his exes on his facebook list, but they never talk to him and he never talks to them. Every once in a while they “like” pictures of he and I together. So I suppose there are no hard feelings there.

Post # 91
Member
1222 posts
Bumble bee

@thiswillbemyusername:  The only ex I know of my SO still keeping in touch with is (or was, when we began dating) one of his best friends. He has the phone numbers and is FB friends with several, but I don’t think he really seeks them out to hang out. They simply have a mutual circle of friends and so it’s inevitable that he associate with them.

I have all my exes on FB, and I know what they’re up to, but there are a couple I don’t talk to unless I happen to run into them. One I have his number, and we talk on FB and stuff but never hang out. One is in the Navy. I haven’t seen him in forever and we’re planning on hanging out when he comes home for Christmas and catching up. My SO knows about this plan and is totally ok with it (even though I was a little surprised).

The topic ‘Do you and/or your FI/spouse keep in touch with exes?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors