(Closed) Do you believe that “everything happens for a reason?”

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Hostess
18615 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think that things do happen for a reason.  With all the bad things that have happened, it sometimes takes a lot for me to piece out why but I really can see how these things have shaped my present and future.

Post # 4
Member
2239 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Well yes and no. When bad things happen to me, I like to think that everything happens for a reason. As in, I like to think that everything will work itself out.

But in other ways I don’t believe that. I’m adopted and I don’t believe that families are meant to be separated. Or that you can be “grown in another person’s tummy”. I couldn’t believe in a god who would be so cruel as to purposefully put you inside of one person, have you grow to know them and love them inside of them and then send you to be with someone else. A lot of people might disagree with that, but that’s my experience.

Its hard for me to believe I’m “meant” to marry my fiance, because I don’t feel as though I was “meant” to end up where I am now. How can we truly be “meant” for one another if I don’t 100 percent believe I was meant to be here in America speaking English, so far from the family I came from?

I would say mostly I try to think positvely about things happening in the future, but I dont believe the past was meant to happen the way it did because after all, we have free will and we can make choices. At any time I can make a choice to do something. Can you really truly have free will and also be destined for your future? I dont know that it can work both ways. 

lol sorry to get so deep. Its something I was thinking about the other day 🙂

Post # 5
Member
769 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I don’t.  Maybe b/c I’m not religious?

I do, however, try to view most things that happen as something to learn and grow from.  I think I’m a fairly positive person, but I believe that sometimes bad things just happen.  I don’t necessarily believe they happen for a reason but believe that what matters is how you pick yourself up, carry on and try to be the best person you can be.  Sorry, that sounded kind of dorky 🙂

Post # 6
Member
3872 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Generally, I do think this.  I am more positive than negative so that might have to do with it. During high school and college, I was more negative and I’m pretty sure I was did not believe in this.

My husband is a slightly more negative than I am and he’s always complaining about why a certain situation alwlays happens to him.  I think he is pissed at the world a lot of the time. Usually, when something bad happens to me, I can usually think of it positively or at least neutrally.

Post # 7
Member
1641 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

No. And i hate it when people say it.

I lost a 4 month old in my family this year, to a painful brain cancer. There can be no reason for that.

Post # 8
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m not one bit religious but I firmly believe in KARMA. Not karma in the idea that one specific situation will affect another, though. More the idea that the general energy you put into the world will come back to you equally 🙂

I don’t, however, believe that everything happens for a reason because some things just can’t be explained, especially if you are not religious (i.e. menobride’s situation).

Post # 9
Member
3098 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Yes, i do. I don’t know why, I just do. I guess that’s blind faith.

Post # 10
Member
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I believe that it depends on the individual.  If you are someone who goes about with the idea that you want to grow as a person and that you want to become the best person you can be spiritually, intellectually, personally, etc. then everything that happens in your life will be for a reason, because you will give it meaning and importance in shaping your journey.

But if you are a person who just kind of drifts through life and never stops to think about who you are or the person you are becoming then the things that happen to you really don’t have much meaning, which I think is way sadder.  When a horrible tragedy happens it is only meaningless if the people who should be affected by it, aren’t.  It’s still horrible either way, it’s still a tragedy either way, but the reason and meaning to it are determined by how we respond.

Post # 11
Member
10368 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

No, absolutely not. I do, however, think that everything has a LESSON in it, and that we can grow from any experience. I don’t believe in destiny or “meant to be”.

Post # 12
Member
612 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

No way. You can always turn a bad situation into a learning experience. There are evil people in this world and that cannot be explained away by “eveything happens for a reason”. What reason could possibly exist to molest and brutally murder a child.

There are evil people and good people. I believe in leading by example. If there were more truly good people in this world we would be better off. Right now evil people rule supreme, whether they simply ignore their children in favor of a drink or mass murder people different from them. Our children grow up knowing mostly evil and then we wonder why societal morals have been derailed. Sad really.

Post # 13
Member
1980 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I believe everything happens for a reason, but for the opposite reason that menobride suggested.

I had a terrible tragedy happen to me about 2 years ago (best friend from highschool was murdered) and believing that everything happens for a reason was the only thing that got me through it. If I didn’t wake up and believe that the joys and tragedys of my life were being spun into making some kind of “Sense” for my life, I don’t know how I could go on. To me, I *have to* believe that it was my friends time to leave this earth, that my FI and I were supposed to break up, that I *had* to move to another city and drop out of graduate school– because in turn that means I believe that the good in my life is coming also– and that the good in my life is every bit as calculated and sure to happen as the bad.

Not sure how to explain it, but it gives me tremendous peace to think that my trials and tribulations are being overseen by a loving God– who knew from the moment I was born that all of this would happen to me, and who knows the good ahead for me.

Post # 14
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

I believe that if I changed anything that happened in the past, I wouldn’t be where I am now.  So if I chose a different major, or career, then I wouldn’t have met my DH, and I wouldn’t be married or have the DD I have now.  It’s a similar belief, but not exactly the same.  I don’t believe that I chose my career so that fate would have me meet my DH, but if I hadn’t chosen that career I would never have met him.  Does that make any sense??

I do believe in Drivers Kharma.  That is, I believe that if you drive courteously, then your lane will be the faster lane in traffic, parking spots will open for you, etc.  And when you drive like a jerk, you end up stuck in traffic.  But maybe that’s just a way to convince myself to drive nicely!

Post # 15
Member
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

No, I don’t believe that everything happens for a reason. I think it’s a coping mechanism created by humans to provide an explanation for events in life. 

Post # 16
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I believe that experiences help shape us as people and we learn and grow from them.  I don’t necessarily think that all these things happen for a reason – though there are times that yes I do think this.  I guess it depends on the person because there are many people who look to find reason and meaning beneath these experiences, and that phrase summarizes what they look for.

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