(Closed) Do you believe your SO is the best person for you?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
771 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Hell yes my husband is the best guy for me!  When we got married, no – I didn’t question if there was someone better (I wondered when we were first started dating, I was quite young, so yeah, there was some curiousity).

What made me stop searching?  Well, when I was going through those earlier phases of “what if”, I eventually realized there is no one in the world I could love more, no one that would love me the way he does.  I’m proud to call him my husband, someone I want to be a father to my children, he’s someone who I want to share a family with.  We support each other, challenge one another, make each other better people.  I adore him.  I feel blessed, so incredibly fortunate to have him to share my life with.  We are best friends and he’s hands down the best thing that’s ever happened to me.  I’m getting misty so I’ll stop.

Post # 4
Member
11422 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I didn’t get married until I was 47 years old. 

I had “fallen in love” (or so I thought at the time) many, many times when I was younger.  I dated a number of guys and had several longer-term relationships of two or more years each.  I was even engaged once before Darling Husband to an absolutely wonderful, sweet, very special guy.

However, I ultimately realized that, in my case, it didn’t matter who I may have thought I loved or wanted to marry or who may have relentlessly pursued me or wanted to marry me (there were three others who told me that they wanted to marry me, but they were not “the one.”)  In my case, I eventually became absolutely convinced that I needed to wait for the man God  had chosen for me.

I had a very long wait — more than 15 years! — between the time I broke my engagement to my former Fiance when I was 30 and when I finally met my Darling Husband. However, I knew that I needed to wait for a certain type of man, and God began to make very clear to me the kind of virtues and traits that I really desired and needed to look for in a mate. At the same time, He was preparing me and teaching me to be the type of woman I needed to become  so that I would be ready to BE the right person for my future husband.

I knew  that I needed to marry a man who loves and is committed to God even more than he would love or be committed to me.  I knew that I needed to marry someone to whom I could entrust my life and the lives of any potential future children, someone to whom I would be able and willing to submit according to the Biblical model for marriage found is Scripture (and that  certainly ruled out a great many people! lol). I knew that I had to marry someone who would enhance — and not compete with — my relationship with God, who would enhance my well being, and would enhance my relationship with others, someone who would challenge me spiritually and in every other way to become more of the person God created me to be.

I also knew that I needed to marry a man who loves children, animals, and people in general and who has learned how to have healthy relationships with his family and friends, a man of deep character and integrity, and a man who is well educated and very intelligent, who is a strong communicator with both the spoken and written word, and who has an extremely strong sense of humor and who can make me laugh even in the midst of life’s greatest challenges.

And, of course, to top it all off, I  had to find him incredibly attractive! 🙂

When I met my Darling Husband, he was the only  man I had ever  dated who met all of those criteria.  I was, at times, scared out of my wits, because marrying my Darling Husband meant that I would have to relocate far away from my friends, my church, my job, my city and state, and all that had been familiar to me for the prior two-and-a-half decades of my adult life.  However, I pressed through my fears and anxieties about how much my life was going to change, and I took the plunge! 🙂

Post # 5
Member
7311 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

There are guys that I have loved in the past and many more that I could theoretically love in the future. But Mr. LK is the ONLY man who was the right candidate to build an entire life with. The guys before were love, but not the kind that was meant for a lifetime commitment of equal partnership and loving companionship. Could there be another man out there who would also fit the bill? Quite possibly. But why keep looking when I’ve already found someone so right for me?

To answer your question, no…. I never questioned whether or not Mr. LK was the right man for me or whether marrying him was the right choice for me. Even when we hit rocky spots in the beginning of our relationship as we worked through all of the emotional baggage we had each brought into the relationship, being with him STILL felt more easy and natural than being in any of my previous relationships. Our roughest times together are better than the best times that I had in previous relationships. Our relationship is just right on every level.

 

Post # 6
Member
12247 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Fiance is LITERALLY everything I could ever want. After 2 bad break ups, I made a list with my therapist about qualities I wanted in a partner.

Fiance is bteer than the person I wrote down on paper!

Post # 7
Member
5892 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I do not think there is only one person in the entire world for you. But I think that Darling Husband is the best person for me and me for him. He is my most favorite person in the world. He loves and accepts all the parts of me that I don’t like. I totally accept him for who he is and completely love the best and worst parts of him. We make a great team and I love being around him. 

What made me say, I’m done. This is good enough for me? Not only did we love each other, find each other attactive and have great sex (good start, but does not always make a good marriage), but we were a great team. We are alike enough in the areas that count and not alike in other so we fill in the gaps. I knew I needed a man that I wasnt going to ‘mother’ or nag or boss around. I needed someone who could be my equal partner. He also will be a great Dad. We have fun doing things together, but we also doing nothing together and we also love our alone time. So in the end, he is the perfect person for me!

Post # 8
Member
4272 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Yes I do believe in the best person for me, that is why I married him.

Post # 9
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Out of all the people in this vast world, the probability is he probably isn’t.  I don’t believe in one person for everyone.  I believe in compatibility.  My husband is very compatible to me, but who is to say someone else couldn’t be?  We all look for certain traits in our significant others.  A lot of these traits are shared by any number of people.

The thing that made me marry him, and that I didn’t need too look for anyone else is how happy he makes me.  I am so fufilled by our relationship that I don’t want anyone else.  I also believe that there is a reason that he came into my life, and not another person and that is why I am with him and no one else.

Post # 10
Member
1381 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Yes.  My man is amazing.  I seriously don’t know how he deals with me sometimes.. When I’m angry, I’m pretty irrational haha

Post # 11
Member
9689 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

I don’t believe there is only one person out there in the world for everyone.  I think there are probably many.  However, Fiance just made me so happy that after we met…I never wanted to even look for anyone else. 

I dated around for 11 years before I met Fiance (only 2 other long-term relationships that were over a year) and I can say for sure that no one else even came close to being as great for me as he is.  We’re very compatible as far as interests, goals, communication style, and what we need from the other person in a relationship is pretty much the exact same.  I just lost any desire to look for anyone else (which had never happened before).

Post # 12
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@nutsoveru:  My Fiance is hands down the best man for me. He’s one of the best men I’ve ever known and I’m happy with him. We are simply compatible and compliment eachother in every way. Sure we get on eachother’s nerves sometimes, who doesn’t, but if I wasn’t certain he’s who I want to be with forever then I wouldn’t have gotten engaged to him.

I don’t believe their is only one person out there that we could be happy with, I’m sure there are others I could build a life with, but I’m happy with who I have.

Post # 13
Member
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

After the long term relationship (12years) that I ended I took a 5 year break and got with myself to determine exactly what I needed and wanted out of a relationship. I worked on myself emotionally and spiritually to prepared myself for my mate. I prayed and gave specifics about what I need in my life to establish the relationship I deserve. I met my Fiance online and our first conversation we talked about why I have not dated and why I waited to date again.

I explained that I had been proposed too 5 times but I never felt they were the men I was suppose to marry. Long story short, my Fiance after talking to him and getting to know him I discovered he was exactly what I prayed for. From his eye color to the way he thinks. He has strong morales, integrity, and self respect; he has a progressive mind which is something that was lacking in my prior relationships.

I was shocked and surprised that he is the man I prayed for. He is the type of man that loves me and genuinely understand me not just say it but know. We are so much alike that our birthdays are days apart mine is 7/23 and his is 7/24. When I got over the shock of having my prayers answered he expressed that he prayed for his wife and knew that I was her.

Post # 14
Member
316 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I without a doubt know that my husband is the best person in the world for me.  I had been in a few pretty serious to very serious relationships in the past and in those relationships I always wandered was I with the right person, was this coworker a better a fit, what about this or that guy friend or what about the FWB I had back when?  With my husband, I never once wandered, from out first date when he first held my hand, when he first hugged me and when he first kissed me, I just knew.  He and I have a connection and a gentle understanding for one another that I never even knew existed.  I guess the way I knew for sure was just a feeling, I don’t know how to describe it, I just knew.  I knew when we talked and I could say and share anything, I knew when he touched me, I knew when we kissed, I knew the first night I fell asleep in his arms.  I just knew.  And we have been together a relatively short time, but to even think about not being with him, for any reason, makes me sad and I tear up.  I cannot imagine anyone that makes me feel the way he does or understands me the way he does or makes me feel as safe.  He is honestly irreplaceable!

Post # 15
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

No one else could understand me better, and no one else could put up with him! LOL, j/k! We are perfect for each other. 

Post # 16
Member
3063 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I haven’t met everyone in the whole world and I do not believe in soulmates, so I cannot logically say “yes” to your first question. However, my husband and I are so compatible, so in love, have so much fun and have such a long history together that I have absolutely no desire to look elsewhere, ever. He’s the love of my life and I only have eyes for him. That is something I haven’t questioned before or after our wedding. I am completely satisfied and happy with my husband.

 

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