(Closed) Do you care what your mom or FMIL wears?

posted 9 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do you care what they wear?
    Nope, they can wear whatever they choose. : (127 votes)
    49 %
    They just cant wear any shade of white. : (111 votes)
    43 %
    They cant wear white and they must follow the color scheme. : (23 votes)
    9 %
  • Post # 48
    1606 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I actually don’t care what my mother wears other than one caveat – I don’t want her to wear your typical “MOB” getup (frumpy dress with long jacket).  My mother is under 50 and still young for her age, so I envision her in something playing that up.  Other than that, the world is her oyster.. πŸ™‚

    Post # 49
    2943 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    We are doing white flowers with pearl accents, so the color doesn’t matter much to me.  Our wedding colors are teal, black, white with a b&w damask print.  My mom and I were out shopping for something to wear to my cousins recent wedding and we found a silver gown that she liked so that’s what mom is going to wear. 

    I’m planning on taking Future Mother-In-Law shopping for her gown.  Blue is her favorite color so I’m hoping we can find a nice neutral shade of blue.  FI and I are going to buy it for her since she doesn’t have a lot of extra money to spend on a gown.  She’s not aware of any of this yet, and I can’t wait to tell her!

    Post # 50
    3479 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

    @lilbluebird:  Awww Mother-In-Law sounds … cute! Good for you for admitting you care!

    I don’t care bc my mom dresses super cute and not skanky and FI’s mom is adorbs so I don’t have to worry too much. I don’t think…

    Post # 51
    144 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I didnt think i did care, but my FMIL has started showing me dresses that she likes, strapless satin in pastel yellow. Considering my gown is straples, satin and cream, I am freaking out that her dress is just going to look like a shorter version of my gown!! So yes, I defintley care!!

    Post # 52
    37 posts
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I really don’t mind what they wear!  I’d prefer them not to weat the same dresses as the bridesmaids (same colour or style would be fine), but since that colour and style are quite popular the moment, if it happens it happens.  I’ll go shopping with my mum, but only because we always go shopping together πŸ™‚  I can’t remmeber an ‘important’ dress she’s picked out in the last 15 or so years that I wasnt with he when she bought!  We did go to a wedding a few months back though, and Mum really didn’t like what the mother of the bride was wearing (it was very tight and flashy, showing a LOT of cleavage) and so mum has decided that’s what she DOESNT want to look like.  lol!

    Post # 53
    7414 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I completely care – my mother has a habit of wearing clothes that are completely inappropriate for her age (partly the fault of my 21 year old sister).  She either dresses WAY too young or WAY too old and has no idea she doesn’t look good.  I want her to look her best while being appropriate.  My Future Mother-In-Law is a large woman who has worn the same outfit to every formal event I’ve seen her go to in the last 8 years.  I would love her to get something new that makes her feel good.  

    Post # 54
    4097 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    @allyfally:  they could show up in burlap sacks for all I care. As long as we have a good time!

    Post # 56
    174 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I don’t really care about what my Future Mother-In-Law is going to wear. I do care what my mom wears though. She has shown me ideas and they are all ‘old lady’ dresses! My mom does not look her age, and I refuse to let her make herself look frumpy and uncomfortable. 

    Post # 57
    1002 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    My mother always tells a story about how at her nephew’s wedding, the bride’s mother wore white and how awwwwful it is to try to upstage the bride. I wasn’t there (I was 4 at the time), so I don’t know what she wore, exactly, but I think white should be avoided at weddings.

    Someone on her once pointed out that other people wearing white/beige/very light pastels make the photos look weird & draws your focus. That’s a consideration, as well.

    Post # 58
    5708 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: July 2012

    My mom wore silver/gray and my Mother-In-Law wore black. I didn’t care one bit, although my mom had the common sense that God gave a billy goat to be like, “Hmm, a lime green pink polka dotted dress probably won’t look right with a brown, pink, and white wedding.”

    Had she wanted to wear that I wouldn’t have cared. I also don’t care my Mother-In-Law wore black. It isn’t a reflection of how she feels about our marriage. She chose it because black is classy and slimming. they both looked great.

    Post # 59
    4 posts

    Well, I have read all the posts, and here’s what I think…I was married 34 yrs ago, with a palette of maroon /blush. Maroon tuxes. My mom looked beautiful in a coordinating dress, but his mom wore an ugly mint     green number. All of the pictures are ridiculous. She sticks out like a sore thumb. I remember this vividly, after 34 yrs. I sorta think she could have found something she was comfortable in, in a different color. So, think twice before you sat you don’t care.   On the same sort of subject, my daughter  is getting married in oct. I bought a dress that my daughter loves, but I am having major buyers remorse. I am second thinking the sequins, and I am afraid I will look like a cow if I don’t lose 50 pounds.My daughter disagrees, and I think my husband wants to throttle me. AND, I can’t return it.  Any advice for me?

    Post # 60
    2300 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2013 - An amazing non-profit retreat

    No advice for you, other than to wear what YOU love. You will be in a large portion of the wedding photos and events, so you need to feel beautiful.


    I don’t really care what my Mom wears. I am just glad that she finally found something other than her old shawl to wear. She is not ninety and should not dress as such πŸ˜› My Mom is being quite adorable about this wedding, actually. She picked out a new dress, shoes, and obsessed over finding the perfect cover-up/sweater. Future Mother-In-Law has seen my Mom’s dress, so she knows what the general colour/look is and I am sure she’ll do just fine.

    Post # 61
    52 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I’ve gone back and forth with this. My mother and my FI’s mother have both passed away but we both have stepmothers (both becoming stepmothers to us when we were adults) and we weren’t sure how involved they’d be (left it up to them),

    Well they both have become very involved which is great (and surprisingly helps with the feelings coming up from losing our moms) so I chatted a bit with them about it and my stepmother felt that they should coordinate with the “palette” LOL My Future Mother-In-Law didn’t want me or my stepmother to have a say at all (which kinda pissed me off in a totally bridezilla “you are not in control way!” LOL Got over it quick). She scared me with almost buying a coral dress ( wedding colors are orange, navy, gray and cranberry accents). I kept my mouth shut and thankfully she chose a really pretty slate blue dress. Kinda early to already buy a dress so my stepmother hasn’t yet, I have more sway with her though πŸ™‚

    Learned my lesson to keep my mouth shut and they’ll dress themselves accordingly πŸ™‚

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