Post # 1
Darling Husband and I have a very egalitarian relationship on most accounts…but I don’t consider myself a feminist. I’m curious how many of you feel the same.
So…do you consider yourself a feminist? Or do you have a traditional relationship where the woman cooks/cleans, the man is primary earner, etc? Or somewhere in between?
Post # 3
Absolutely not, Fiance makes the money, I stay home and take care of the little one and when we live together I will do the cooking and cleaning. It is just what works for us.
Post # 4
I am in fact a feminist- feminism promotes equalitarianism across all genders, orientations and etc- my faction of feminism is somewhat post modern (feminist discourses on equality for women in different societies, races, classes, etc). I am an activist on woman’s issues and Im involved in women’s and gender studies as well. My focus for my graduate studies will be in this area, and my SO is aware and just as passionate as myself on such issues too. Its one of the major contributing factors of why we go so well together- its a big part of our value systems.
Post # 5
@GirlWithARing: I most definitely consider myself a feminist. I know that in our relationship I will be the primary breadwinner ($$ wise) and that is something I am okay with as long as FH helps out with the children. Luckily I have picked a career where I can be mom and career woman.
As for chores we don’t live together at the moment, but I plan to divide things evenly. I plan on having a compromise system where I take chores he doesn’t like, and he’ll take chores I don’t like.
Post # 6
Eh.. I don’t exactly consider myself a feminist. I mean, I agree with a lot of what feminism stands for EXCEPT for all the “women must work, they absolutely cannot stay home”.
Feminism, to me, means equal rights for both sexes but with the right to choice. Right now I’m unemployed and SAH. I do all the cleaning and cooking and laundry. When we move and I get a job I’ll still do all of the household chores, simply because I can do them better and quicker.
Post # 7
I’m not sure what “egalitarian” relationship means. But my parents are extremely conservative and tend to follow the typical man and woman roles. Fiance and I try not to do this but I do tend to do a lot of the housework because I’m nice. Everything else we do together
Post # 8
@Gingersnap: the idea that there is no choice in regards to SAHMs is promoted by SOME feminists, not all- many tenants of post modern feminist theory and modern feminism advocate a personal choice to all women- as long as that choice is made freely with awareness. Thats the faction I follow myself personally.
Post # 9
I believe that women should have equal rights and protection under the law to vote, make the same wage, and to be whatever they want to be. Women have equal status to men in terms of their opinions, values, beliefs, etc…. they’re just as valid and have just as much a right to be heard.
With that said… Darling Husband and I do have a very traditional relationship, but it’s by choice. I tend to do more cooking and cleaning because I like it. Darling Husband fixes stuff and takes care of our cars because he likes it. We both work, but live on DH’s income in order to put mine away for savings, since I want to eventually stay home for several years with our kids and we figured we might as well live on one income from the start. It has nothing to do with him being a man and me being a woman… we just use our strengths and interests to benefit each other as a couple.
When making decisions, we make them together — he doesn’t domineer me, and I don’t manipulate him into doing what I want. It’s very give and take, looking out for the best interests of each other.
I don’t know if that would make others put the label of ‘feminist’ on me or not, but to be honest, I don’t really care about the label. I’m more concerned about having a strong relationship with Darling Husband where we both feel supported, heard, loved, respected, and that the other is doing what’s best for our relationship.
Post # 10
@Bellanouva: Oh yea I know it’s not the belief of all feminists, it’s just the more commonly publicized notion.
Post # 11
Do I believe I (and ALL women) should have the RIGHT to make a CHOICE (to work, stay home, to raise children, to not have children, to vote, etc)? To make an equal wage for a man in the same job? To have the same opportunities, responsibilities and rights? Yes. Absolutely. I’m a feminist.
Post # 13
I really hope that all of us are feminists, and that all of the men in our lives are too. As @JeniRae said- if you believe that women deserve the same rights and opportunities as men, you are a feminist.
Post # 14
Heck yes I’m a feminist. In college I was the vice president of our feminist group. 🙂
We don’t live together yet, but we’ve talked about dividing chores evenly. In theory, lol, it will happen though I’m sure we’ll have an adjustment period. When it comes to money, I’m going to make more than him. His job has a 24-on 48-off schedule, so he’ll be doing a lot more childcare than I will once we get to that.
Along with many other feminists, I do believe mothers and fathers should be ‘allowed’ to stay at home with their kids, but I don’t think it should be the mother by default.
Post # 15
YES! I was just about to post this!
I believe the being a feminist means that women have the right to choose!
They can stay at home, or work, or earn more or not have children or raise the children – whatever they want to do they can!
Even if it is a women’s choice to be completely submissive, then that too is her choice. As long as she is happy and not forced into that lifestyle then that is her choice.
I feel the same way about men, they can stay at home or work or anything!
Feminism = choice
Post # 16
Fiance and I have a very traditional relationship. I take care of the house, family, and him…but this is a role I really enjoy. I don’t consider myself a feminist, but I don’t consider myself the opposite either. I just seem to have fit into the traditional domestic role from a very young age, it just is who I am.