(Closed) Do you do his laundry?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Who does the laundry?

    I do my laundry, and he does his

    I do both of our laundry, and I have a full time job

    I do both of our laundry, and work p.t. or SAHM

    He does both of our laundry

    Other - refer to comment below

  • Post # 3
    366 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    We both do the laundry and half the housework. We also pay exactly half for rent, grocery shopping, bills etc and we both work full time.


    I’m sorry, but laundry is not a “womens” job. I would tell him to do it himself!


    Post # 4
    2532 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    We both do laundry. It all goes into one basket so we do whatever needs doing. 

    Edit: If he wants something washed then he knows it needs to go in the basket. I haven’t had the opportunity to put anything away for him as he tends to do that…but I think we tend to out away our own stuff. He is usually a bit more “anal” about folding and I daren’t do it wrong. 

    Post # 5
    1161 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @Jamieg:  All our clothes go in the corner/basket and whoever notices theres a pileup chucks it on, then whoever remembers its done throws it in the dryer or we hang it up on weekends, and whoever can be bothered or remembers brings it in, and Fiance usually puts it away (I hate folding and sorting for some reason… I like the rest fine, just not that!)

    Ive never seen a household where a couple do seperate laundry, and the only woman I know who does all the laundry in the house is Future Mother-In-Law, but she is super, SUPER mum!


    I think the only tasks we negate to male or female only are that he does the car-related stuff because I know nothing, and he does the lawns, because I cant start our stupid old mower! He does dishes, laundry, cleaning and anything else when necessary.

    Post # 6
    2479 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I do our laundry because I have systems and am also a tad picky about them so it suits me to do it rather than cope with random loads of laundry hung (badly) around the house.

    However, my doing the laundry comes with one clear rule – nobody gets to complain about this excellent service! If my DH ever dared to complain about how it was hung in the wardrobe or whether shirts were turned the right way round he’d be sent down to the nearest river and invited to wash his own clothes by banging them against stones. 

    We’ve always shared chores and simply don’t tolerate the idea that there’s such a thing as “Women’s work”. Marriage (and co-habitation) is a partnership therefore both partners do their share. Right now my DH is coping with treatment for cancer and this exhausts him so naturally, I do a whole lot more but he never takes this for granted. However any fit and healthy man should share the chores.


    Post # 7
    918 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    Reminds me of my ex ILs.  exMIL was pretty traditional, did most of the housework herself, including the laundry.  Also worked full time as a teacher.

    The washing machine broke down and they needed a new one.  exFIL refused to contribute to the cost.  His arguement was….seriously…that ‘he never used it’ Surprised


    He meant it, too.  Unbelieveable.  No one had clean laundry for 3 weeks until common sense prevailed.

    Fiance has also been spoilt by a mother who does it all.  I’ve made it crystal clear that at the age of 43 a man should be able to do his own laundry.  After a couple of occasions where he did only his and I went ballastic, if there is a load doing, he does it.  It’s whoever notices that it needs doing.  

    Post # 8
    104 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    I do both of our laundry, my main reason being that if Fiance did it I feel like all our whites would be pink and everything would be shrunk lol.  FI admits he’s never had to do it before (thanks to his mom) and it’s not something I really mind doing.  I have some rules though lol.  I do not pick up laundry – if it’s in the laundry baskets, it will get washed, if it’s on the floor, it will not (luckily Fiance is super neat and this is never an issue).  Also, I do not sort laundry.  One time I was pulling laundry and found a red shirt and white socks in with the darks.  I texted Fiance a pic of the evidence and told him FYI next time this happened, his clothes were going over the balconey…haven’t had any problem with sorting since. 🙂  I also don’t put clothes away or iron.  I mean, c’mon, I’m not his mom!

    Post # 9
    168 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I do all of our laundry on the weekends. Wash, dry, and fold. I only put mine away. He puts his away.

    I don’t see a point to separating mine and his and doing separate washes. It seems like a waste of time and energy when it could easily just be done by one person.

    I don’t mind laundry! We split chores around the house and I took laundry because he’s doing the “dirty” stuff 🙂 (cleaning the litter box, taking out the trash, cleaning the bathroom, etc.)

    Although, if he ever made some kind of comment about the laundry not being done “right”, he would totally be responsible for doing all of the laundry for a few weeks.

    Post # 10
    2622 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @Jamieg:  ooooh boy would my DH get a spankin for those assumptions! And not the good kind!

    When we are both working FT and working about the same number of hours we split the duty of laundry. Not in an official way, but Ill put it in when its full and ask him to fold or switch it. Or hell decide he ran out of underwear and do a load.

    Now I am working PT at the moment so I do it all.

    I was putting some of his laundry away, but I am not sure his Tshirt orgnization method so I was just putting those on the floor of his closet. When I discovered after a month he wasnt putting the shirts away I stopped putting anything away for him. If he couldnt take the time to put a few shirts away, then I dont need to put the rest away. Now it just gets folded and put on his closet floor. 

    There is an agreed upon chore assignment but there is absolutely no reason that its either person’s “duty” and if DH or myself stops appreciating the effort then we have problems.  I thank him every week for mowing the lawn. Its his assigned chore while I am pregnant because he wont let me do it, but I still thank him and try to help by picking up sticks in the way.  

    Post # 11
    2777 posts
    Sugar bee

    @Jamieg:  we both do laundry but I do most of the housework. He has a FT time job but I’m a FT student, nanny and I take care of my daughter all day.

    Post # 12
    358 posts
    Helper bee

    Laundry and cleaning are not my SOs strong suite so I take care of it.  But he does alot of things that I’m not good at like doing all the maintance on our cars and fixing mine cause it breaks alot etc.  And if I ever ask him to help if I’m having a busy week, he doesn’t mind and will help out

    Post # 13
    2854 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    We both do all the laundry, it just depends who gets to it first. Although sometimes I’ll wash/dry it, and Fiance will put it away. Putting laundry away is one of my least favorite things to do lol.

    When we first started living together , he complained about how I did the laundry once or twice, so I said fine you can do it all the time haha. But now that I’m back in school, I’m at home more, so I can throw in a load while I’m doing homework, and he’ll fold it later.

    Post # 14
    5373 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I do all of the laundry/ironing/putting clothes away and I work part-time and am a full-time student. I don’t mind that laundry is one of the chores I do, because we never really have that much of it and I find it satisfying to fold it and put it away. We just bought a new washing machine (first adult purchase for our house aha) and so I enjoy using it. He will do it if I ask him to though and he isn’t very particular about how it’s done. It’s just how we have chores split.

    Post # 15
    443 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    View original reply
    @Miss Stephanie:  +1

    I do the laundry, but he puts away his own clothes. I work full time, as does he. I work in a professional setting, and he works in construction, so some times his dirty jeans need to get stockpiles, cuz I am not washing them with mine. In return, he does the dishes. I sometimes put away clean ones in the rack (we don’t have a diswasher). 

    Post # 16
    58 posts
    Worker bee

    I sort it. He puts it on.

    I told him flat out when I moved in that I hated ironing and wouldn’t be responsible for his laundry. We’re also two of five people sharing an apartment with one washer, so it’s often a race to get laundry done before it gets too late in the day for it to dry.

    SO gets up at 5:30 to go running most days, so I’ll sort colours, darks and whites the night before, and he’ll throw a load in the machine before he goes running, and switch it out when he gets back, to make sure we’re not competing for the washer later. We both hang it out, and are each responsible for ironing and putting away our own things.


    If I were you, I would probably end up telling your Fiance that he can either ask you to do something, or tell you how he wants it done, but not both. If he wants his laundry done just the way he likes it, he can do it himself.

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