(Closed) Do you ever feel like you’re wishing your life away?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think we can all identify with the feeling! I don’t know whether it is in our nature or a societal pressure, but it seems as though there is always the next step or the next thing to be wanting or having. That book sounds great, I will have to look it up!

Post # 4
Member
2731 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@Juliepants: I definitely understand how you feel, and sometimes I feel I do the same thing. Like, before I got engaged I was almost consumed by anxiety and excitement to actually be proposed to, and then it happened. And after that I was like “Well, now I have to start planning a wedding!” Except, I really don’t. My wedding is over two years away, so I’m not starting any serious planning for at least another 4 or 5 months. I’m definitely making a conscious effort these days now that my “OMG propose already!” days are over to just enjoy being engaged and being where we are right now before life gets really crazy. I also really understand the thing about wanting to get things done while your parents are around. I only have my mom, and she’s a drinker and a smoker and not in the best of health and I think about it everyday that if I don’t do something soon enough (like getting married or having kids) then she might miss it and I’ll never forgive myself.

Ughhh.

Sorry to write you a novel, but I just really empathize with you πŸ™‚

Post # 5
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I find myself stressing about or just overthinking the future. I think it’s normal to try and have our whole lives planned out but there are some things that just don’t go as planned. Sometimes I get so wrapped up in the future that I don’t appreciate the present. As long as you can appreciate the now and also make lists go for it! After all women are great multi taskers. I don’t think you need a book to tell you to live more in the moment. If you feel that the future is occupying too much space in your head evict it and take the moment in.

Post # 6
Member
6248 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

I know what you mean.  I always need something to look forward to and to focus on.  Recently I had the realization that I’m in a really good place right now in life and I’m so thankful for it.

Post # 7
Member
2731 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@MapleMoose: That describes me perfectly. Especially lately, I always feel like I need something on the horizon to look forward to or life seems so dull. It’s terrible, and I’m really trying to change that and focus on now and what I have to look forward to every single day.

Post # 9
Member
3220 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I feel like this sometimes, especially in an LDR.  I’m always counting down until the next visit or holiday, or graduation in May so we can move closer.  I try to make an effort to live in the moment but it’s hard!

Post # 10
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Same here! Lots of waiting for the proposal, now I’m counting down to the wedding, graduation, the bar exam, getting a job, finding our own place, eventually babies….oy! I need to just remember that I only get the one life, so I better ENJOY all of the moments I’m in rather than planning out all of the times that aren’t guaranteed to me. 

Not sure if you’re a country fan, but Trace Atkins has a song called ‘You’re Gonna Miss This.’ It could be the background music for this post πŸ™‚

Post # 11
Member
444 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Yeah, I’m a list maker. We don’t want kids for a few years, and have a house already, and I’m not really into decorating it etc, so I have no idea what I’ll do post wedding!

It’s partly being gen y, partly just my personality. I don’t know what to do abt it either.

Post # 12
Member
3978 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

This is something I’ve never really had a hard time with. My sister is very much like you and from an early age I can remember thinking, “why is she in such a hurry to do everythig?” lol

I never even considered marriage until I met my Darling Husband. That worked out well πŸ™‚ but I’m sure I would have happily died an old maid if I’d never met him.

I chose my college major based on what I thought was the most interesting and fun.I did great but there’s not much you can do with it without grad school so now I’m doing nothing related to my major.

I’m terrible at making plans and terrible at remembering things that aren’t right in front of me–which makes me a pretty bad friend since I’m always so in the moment that remembering to email someone or set up times to meet is a colossal struggle.

Also, I can get so engaged in something that I zone out and am thus super jumpy πŸ™‚ Darling Husband laughs at me but I jump almost every time he walks down the stairs because I’m so focused on what I’m doing at my computer that I don’t notice him till he’s right there! Which can make me seem guilty or unsocialable.

Just wanted to give you the other side of the coin. Being in the moment is a great habit to build, but the other side can also be a strength.

Post # 13
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

You are not alone. I can totally relate. And it drives me bananas! I try so hard to just live in the moment. I am always looking forward to something, never really live in the moment when that something comes. Like you, I am so very blessed with my current life and should be so happy to live in the moment. I have no idea how to do better at this. One thing that does work is sometimes something hits me and I just stop and relize how great the current moment is. So, if I am out with friends, at dinner with Darling Husband or hanging with family…there is a point that I realize how special and great things are I allow myself to live in the moment. Its funny, my orientation to my job is what made me realize this. They kept brining up being there when you are talking with someone. e.g. when someone calls you, dont be multitasking, checking email, etc. you should put everything down and concentrate on that conversation. That stuck with me and I try to do it. I am sure that 75% of my day I do not but I usually realize it and than try to  focus on NOW. πŸ˜€

Post # 15
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@Juliepants: yeah, that strategy helps a lot. And also, I notice other people not doing it. Like, when I am talking to someone and I can totally tell  that I dont have their attention. 

Post # 16
Member
14485 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Yeah, but with daily life, not really milestones for me.  I was just talking to a friend about how time just flies.  And I was like of course its flying, we spend 4 or 5 days of the week just wishing the days away faster so that it would be the weekend agai!

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