(Closed) Do you ever wonder what people really think of you?

posted 8 years ago in Weddingbee
Post # 3
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I’ve wondered about what people think from time to time… but the truth is, often you will never know.  And – if you think about it some more – does it really even matter what people think??

Focus your time on being kind and polite to people and treating them with respect, and you can’t go wrong!

I also think that people view life with their own set of lenses… meaning, sometimes their reaction or interpretation of events has nothing to do with you – but with whatever is going on in their own life.  

 

Post # 5
Member
1294 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I care what people think of me to an extent. I don’t want people thinking I am something/someone I am not. And I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings on purpose or ruin their day.

On the other hand, people can like me or not and I don’t really give a crap. 

Some people like to hide behind their computers and become something they aren’t. You see these posts and you KNOW people wouldn’t talk like this face to face in real life. Alot of the comments I see on the internet in general are insane. You would get smacked for saying some of these crazy things in real life…..

BUT to answer your question, No for the most part I DO NOT care what people think of me, esp. on the internet..

Post # 6
Member
5388 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

In a way I still care. I care a lot about if someone thinks I hurt them when I didn’t mean to. Someone that is close to FH that I was very close to is saying mean things about me now (he is also saying them about FH). It hurts even though it is not true. Hopefully I will get to the point where I would be able to shake it off faster (no matter who is saying it).

Post # 7
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I honestly could care less…..but it is *never* my intention to hurt someone’s feelings by giving my opinion regarding the various board discussions posted on the Hive. 

A lot can be lost in translation online though. Plus, I must say that I totally agree with Oracle!! Well put.

Post # 8
Member
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I do care, if someone thinks I hurt their feelings and I didn’t mean to. But otherwise, I really don’t care what others think about me. I try my best to be as polite and respectful to everyone around me, and I think that’s honestly all I can do. If someone doesn’t like me, I see it as their problem, not mine.

 

Post # 9
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I care a lot, probably too much. And I’ve come a long way with how I communicate on this site, it took me a while to learn how to voice my opinions without sounding snarky. So I know I’ve probably upset some people along the way and that actually makes me feel really bad. 

In person, I’ve never been the ‘popular’ girl, it’s always been hard for me to make and keep friends. I’m nice but slightly awkward. And I don’t do well in cliques at all, in face 100% of the time I’m the scapegoat for the clique, I’m always the one left out and made fun of. But it’s something I’m working on and I think with age it’s only getting better. But yeah I do really care if people like me.

Post # 10
Member
7806 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Hah!  One of the few perks of getting older is you start caring less & less about what other people think of you.

Post # 11
Member
1893 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I think I’m perceived as a somewhat controversial poster on these boards (although I’m really not that way offline, I honestly think there is some heightened sensitivity on here) and do tend to remind myself that posting honestly will ultimately result in ruffling a few feathers, given the fact that this is a public message board with hundreds of different personalities.  

Do I care what people in my everyday life think of me?  Of course.  Do I lose sleep over what a random person I have never, nor will I ever meet in real life thinks of me? Not especially. I usually just chalk it up to not being able to please everyone.  I actually do a fair amount of self censoring to keep the feather ruffling to a minimum, but if it’s a choice between pissing off a few random people I don’t know or sugar coating my opinion beyond recognition, I’m going to choose the former.

When it comes down to it, if you can’t speak your mind on an anonymous internet message board, where can you speak your mind? 

Post # 12
Member
1854 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I would never intend to hurt anyone and always try to give helpful comments – even if it is not the most popular idea, it’s always authentic.

I would like to think that everyone likes me and sees that I’m always coming with good intentions, but I know that I can be direct and it won’t be appreciated by all. And I’m ok with that. I really do not care if people don’t like it, at least I know I came with the best intentions and if they can’t take it, too bad for them.

πŸ˜‰

Post # 13
Member
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I care a lot about what other people think, even if I know I’ll never actually meet them. I’m a people pleaser in real life, too, and it bothers me when people don’t like me. The day everyone on the waiting board at the knot basically ‘yelled’ at me, I might’ve cried a ton. I’m really glad that at weddingbee, even if we don’t like anyone, we don’t gang up on other people. 

Honestly, when it comes to this site, I just pretend that you all either like me or are just completely indifferent :).

Post # 14
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I care– but not if people think I’m a bitch or whatever. Honestly, as long as I don’t come across as stupid, I’m good!

Post # 15
Member
3613 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Nah, not really. At 35 I’m too old to play the popularity game. I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m completely comfortable in my own skin. In real life at times I’ve been in the position of the well-liked and admired girl, at times been the target of hatred and jealousy and cattiness, and at other times probably passed judgement on by people that never even really knew me and labeled me just by appearances. I can’t possibly explain myself to everyone and hope that they like me, so I don’t even give it a second thought anymore. Heck, I don’t even like a lot people myself so why should they like me? πŸ™‚

On the message boards I care even less if people remember me by a made-up moniker or think I’m cool. I just try to be polite and helpful and offer any constructive advice I may have. Especially now that I’m married and I’ve been through the journey I like to help others whenever I can. If it’s a non-wedding related issue I feel passionately about I may just speak my mind freely even when I know it’s not the popular opinion. I’m always careful to not hurt anyone’s feelings though because that’s who I am, I can’t ever be mean or hurtful. Not because it may make me unpopular, but because it’s just not a nice thing to do.

Also on the boards there are so many people that I’ve thought over time are sweet or intelligent or funny or cool, but then I tend to forget the names. So all Bees, if you’re awesome, it’s quite possible I thought that of you and then forgot who you were πŸ™‚ The names I tend to remember are the more radical, more polarizing posters.

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