Post # 1
I’m sure we’ve all gotten the comments, at some point, from clueless but good intentioned (well, sometimes, sometimes they’re just being snarky) observers of our long distance relationships:
“How can you know he’s being faithful?”
“What if he has another girlfriend there?”
“How can you trust him?”
How do you deal with people like that? Or HAVE you ever had your doubts?
Post # 3
Yes I did worry about it but thats because I worry about everything. I let my mind get the best of me sometimes. Obviously I couldnt tell he was being faithful other than to suck it up and trust him. Once I started going out to visit him at school and he introduced me as his Girlfriend I obviously was a bit more comfortable with it and had less doubts. He wouldnt want me to come visit if he were dating other girls! I think most of my fear came from the fact he was in a fraternity (I was in a sorority for about 6 months) and I know the stereotype and I dont trust girls very easily.
Post # 4
Never. He brags about me to everyone he knows; would he do that if he weren’t happy with our relationship?
It’s actually not that hard to spot a cheater – I’ve learned from experience. My beloved is just not that kind of guy.
Post # 5
For the record, I don’t worry about J either 🙂
It’s funny to me, he’s a middle school teacher and is ‘friends’ with a bunch of his students on facebook, and I guess as soon as his relationship status changed they started trying to figure out who I was. He posted some pics from his trip here (to China) to see me and the he said there were all sorts of rumors going around the middle school about why he had gone to China… common consensus was that we’d come here together on vacation. Right after we started dating.
Middle schoolers aren’t the brightest bunch, haha. That said, even if I didn’t trust J implicitly, or know him as well as I do, our relationship has enough of a public persona that he’d never be able to get away with anything.
It drives me up a wall when people ask though, because there’s NO way to respond that doesn’t make you look jealous.
Post # 6
you know, i don’t worry about him. he’s always been a one-woman type of girl and i know that i am the only one he wants.
Post # 7
- Wedding: July 2018 - Dreams Cancun Resort & Spa
Never, but I hope that it stays that way.
Post # 8
@dd, you know that’s true. you either look jealous or naiive. it’s like, apparently only people in sdr’s can be sure that their SO isn’t cheating on them.
Post # 9
I think it’s only natural to worry sometimes…but at the end of the day, I trust him… We both have been the victim of infidelity…I was cheated on while in a long-term relationship (he got the woman pregnant to boot), he was cheated on by his wife (who got pregnant by another man)…even though it was years ago we both learned that we would never out each other through that type of betrayal so I think we are both good on that count…thankfully.
Post # 10
It never even crossed my mind not because I’m naive but I trust him with my life and I know he feels the same way.
Post # 11
Spike is simply not that kind of person. Honesty, fidelity and loyalty are too important to him. The concept of cheating disgusts both of us.
Earlier this year it turned out that one of his brothers left his wife. Apparently there may have been another woman involved. Spike was very angry, hurt and disappointed in his brother. He said it was just so painful that this person that he admired and looked up to could do something so incredibly wrong. He was torn up about it for a while and is still not really happy with his brother. That told me a lot about Spike’s character.
Besides, he just doesn’t have time, he spends most of it talking to me!
Post # 12
I think that I had very silly fears at times during the beginning of our relationship when I was just getting to know him, but we both trust each other. Also, sharing the same strong religious/spiritual values really helps keep our faith in each other strong so that we luckily don’t have to worry about this.
We also don’t hang out with the opposite sex alone our of respect for one another and we tell each other EVERYTHING if another person hits on us or something like that so that we keep the communication open which really helps.
Post # 13
No i never did. I knew if he ever did, it’d come around to bite him in the ass =]. He feels very strongly against this sort of thing–he kissed another girl while he had a girlfriend like WAY back in high school and it’s left a bad taste in his mouth. He still feels SO WRONG about it. I never fathomed in a millino years he’d cheat on me. i know everyone says that tho. I figured if he did, fine, i don’t need him. And i’d move on. But yes, people told me all the time how military men have girls in every port =]. Lucky for me, he knew how good he had it.
But yes you’re either paranoid or naive, one or the other =]. I have tons of jealous friends who are like “omg ic ouldn’t do that” b/c they aren’t like me. i’m just…really secure and i figure that if something like that happened, then it wasn’t mean to be. I have a very…laid back (?) view of life and relationships. I guess I always know it’s not the end of the world and in the end, he’s the loser, the one ruining things, not me.
Post # 14
If I had any doubts or suspicions I wouldn’t have let it come this far. I don’t worry about that stuff. I hope that never changes!
Post # 15
I never did. I’ve generally dated “one-woman” men and with my husband I never had thoughts about unfaithfulness.
That’s not to say I never got jealous…he had girl friends and I had guy friends that we both saw on occaion, but it was more jealousy that other peopel got to hang out with him and not me, than it was I was concerned about infidelity.
If I had any concerns, I’d probably not have gone through the LDR inthe first place. It was hard enough!
Though i have to say rarely did I get asked questions about it. My circle knew him before we were LDR and knew it wasn’t a possibility!
Post # 16
I am a very jealous person, and having had a cheating boyfriend before (and not knowing the language…so if he were on the phone with another girl…I would really not know…), I was very very scared the first time I went back to Canada. However, he told me later that he was much more worried about me because he thought I might second guess everything once I was back in my own country (or have a guy waiting for me back home!). After he told me that I realized my own fears were really ridiculous and based on my own insecurities rather than the reality of who he is as a person.