(Closed) Do you feel if you didn't live with your SO, he'd propose sooner?

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Do you feel if you didn't live with your SO, he'd propose sooner?
    Yes and I regret it. : (22 votes)
    14 %
    Yes but I don't regret it at all. : (30 votes)
    19 %
    No, living together has had no impact on the process. : (53 votes)
    34 %
    Other (please explain) : (15 votes)
    10 %
    We wouldn't have discussed marriage before living together. : (35 votes)
    23 %
  • Post # 32
    Member
    1430 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    If we hadn’t lived together I don’t think marriage would even be on the radar for me right now. When we met I was living in North Carolina and he was living in Alberta in Canada. So marrying him was the last thing on my mind given the fact that we hadn’t spent a whole lot of time together in person one on one. Plus I know he wouldn’t have even considered proposing to me since we were so far apart and hadn’t spent a huge chunk of time together while being in close proximity to one another. It was one thing seeing each other for a few weeks at a time while I was virtually on a vacation to see him. And it’s been quite another to live everyday real life with him day in and day out. It helped us to see what we both were like on an everyday basis and not what we were like when everything was peachy and rainbows. Also, in hindsight I’m glad we are living together now because I don’t think I could’ve went much longer doing the long distance relationship thing.

    Post # 33
    Member
    1430 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    @HeartsandSparkles:  This is how my sister’s boyfriend feels I think. He told her marrying won’t change anything but their last name. They already have two kids together and have lived together for close to 7 years. For me though I look at it like this. Yes when we get married we will have already lived together and such, but there are things I refuse to do until we’re married like have children. So yeah when we get married I won’t get that initial joy of moving in with him again, but there are still things that will be new for us that we will only do once we are married.

    Post # 34
    Member
    433 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2012

    @pokie45:  

    If the two of you are serious about being together forever, living together is the natural next step and a good test for compatibility. Before you move in, however you should sit down and agree on the fact that this will lead to engagement and marriage one day. My guy knew where we stood, I moved in and in one year’s time engagement was expected, or he was gonna be in hot water! Just be clear about your expectations for the long run and there won’t be any disappointments. 

    Post # 35
    Member
    2696 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    My husband waited until we moved in together to propose.

    Post # 36
    Member
    377 posts
    Helper bee

    I put other….

     

    We live together but at my parents. We’re house hunting at the moment and I think its the fact that we don’t have our own place yet that is delaying the proposal!

    Post # 37
    Member
    23 posts
    Newbee

    Yeah I do feel like moving in together delayed things. Only because I feel if we hadn’t moved in together he would have proposed so we COULD move in together. I’m glad he didn’t just marry me so we could live together though. My main reason for feeling the way I do is I get “We already live together and live like we’re married so whats the rush?” Ugh! I’m like if we already live like we’re married then what’s the hold up on actually doing it!?! lol

    Post # 38
    Member
    2949 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    I didn’t vote in the poll because whilst we wouldn’t get married without living together first, we aren’t planning to move in together until AFTER we have gotten engaged and it is because we’re not living together that has contributed to making the wait longer.

    Post # 39
    Member
    598 posts
    Busy bee

    There is no “No, and living together made him propose sooner.” I think being committed and sharing things made my fiance realize that he is ready for marriage with me.

    Post # 40
    Member
    4675 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    We moved in together in June and he proposed mid July.  So, no, I don’t think moving in together had any affect on our engagement. 

    Post # 41
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - ceremony at a gazebo outside, reception at neighboring restaurant on a lake

    I think living together probably helped my Fiance realize that we 100% can be happily married and it helped move it along for him.  I do not think that is the case with most guys.  I think it would delay it for most guys as they can have their cake and eat it too. 

    We moved in together in October and he took me ring shopping in February and proposed in May.

    Post # 42
    Member
    2203 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @auggiefrog:  exact same months but just happened this year for me! we had a very gradual transition into living together, so there have been no surprises living together so far. i personally didnt want to live together before getting married, but it just worked out better for saving money for the wedding. plus i like spending mkre time with him. 🙂

    Post # 43
    Member
    270 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    Living together was what made him want to marry me.  =)

    Post # 44
    Member
    1975 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    i would never even consider accepting a proposal before living with them. If anything it would make me reconsider the whole relationship!  Luckily Fiance feels exactly the same

    Post # 45
    Member
    1975 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @WonderBee:  aww thats sweet

    Post # 46
    Member
    36 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @pecanpie:  I agree it sped up the process for us to! Things couldn’t be any better living with the person you love the most… He said the first time I went away after moving in was when he really realized that I was the one 🙂

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