(Closed) Do you feel like any stigmas hold you back in the bedroom?

posted 8 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: Are there any stigmas that have held you and your SO back in bed?
    Yes, they're social stigmas : (15 votes)
    30 %
    Yes, they're religious stigmas : (6 votes)
    12 %
    No, we're totally open! : (27 votes)
    54 %
    Other, please explain : (2 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 3
    3126 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2017

    My Fiance has quite a few hangups where as I have…very little or none. I know that I will not be able to change him, so I dont try. He does go out of his way to do things that he knows I like even if he doesnt get any joy from them but is pretty unwilling to let me try things new on him.

    Thats quite the different issue from what you are facing. His friend sounds VERY close minded and his opinions should have no place in your bedroom! I am trying to think of something that would help.

    Basically, I would say are you attracted to men? No? Okay, you are not gay. Do you think it will flip a switch and you will suddenly become gay? No? Okay, so whats the issue?

    Being gay implies that you enjoy a sexual act with someone of the same sex. If it is with someone of the opposite sex, it doesn’t make you gay.

    I hope other Bees have some better advice for you!

    Post # 4
    1553 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    @MissTatas:  Agreed.  I never understood why doing certain acts WITH A WOMAN were considered gay.  If you are in bed with a woman and you aren’t secretly imagninging she is a man, how can anything the two of you do together be gay?

    Post # 6
    429 posts
    Helper bee

    its really cool that hes open with you cuz my SO would never tell me sumthing like dat! ever 

    Post # 7
    2154 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    That “friend” sounds like an ignorant douchenozzle.* But it also sounds like your SO has some pretty serious hangups. Tell him that his girlfriend playing with his ass does not, of course, make him the least bit gay. HOWEVER! Thinking about your male friends while she does or doesn’t play with your ass is… pretty gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

    *I was going to call him an asshole, but reconsidered. Lol!

    Post # 8
    687 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Too Much Information alert:


    my man likes it and he’s DEFINITELY not gay… *wink*


    Post # 9
    1480 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    @Beluga: Hahaha!! Too funny!

    OP, it sucks that your FI’s friend’s weird sexual insecurities are going to cause your Fiance to miss out. Fiance and I have talked about trying that too… we still haven’t gotten around to it, but we do intend to!

    Post # 10
    373 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    @mrs.peters.to.be:I’ve known guys like that. My sister’s bf had her do that once when he was drunk and was just realllllly embarassed after. Men can be stupid sometimes. I did it (just a little, like outer play nothing too in depth) with my fiance and it makes sex a lot crazier. Its just a prostate thing. Its biological its not gay or straight. Maybe you should get him drunk and just go for it (just a little haha)

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