(Closed) Do you feel like some of your friends are jealous??

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Not really sure how not stopping by your house and not having boyfriends means they are jealous but I will say a really good friend of mine and her FH just bought a house 3 months ago and I haven’t seen it. I’m not jealous and I want to see it but I haven’t had time, maybe they are in similar situations.

Post # 4
3942 posts
Honey bee

@SoontobeMsL: We bought a house last year and some of my friends made no effort to visit. I don’t thnk they were/are jealous though…they are just at different places in their life. My hobbies changed when we got a house, for example I prefered staying at home doing house projects. And they can’t relate and we just have different interests. It sucks, because I miss them. But I can understand their side too.

Post # 5
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I agree that not stopping by to see your house probably isn’t them trying to not be excited for you, but people are busy. However if there are other things your friends are doing that make you think they may be jealous, I would say thats probably not reaching. You probably have a lot of things your friends may want, a loving SO, a new home, a wedding coming up, etc. If you think they are jealous maybe you should take some time out to spend time with them and try not to talk wedding, house, etc. Just have fun and enjoy your relationship with them.

Good luck!

Post # 6
6830 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I can see your point, Darling Husband and I bought a house over 2 years ago and 3 of my friends who live in my home town which is about an hour and half away and couple come this way quite a bit to go shopping have never seen our house.  But those girls expect me to visit them when I am down there.

Honestly who knows if they are not in your case. As a PP said they maybe in a differ point in their life than you

Post # 7
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’m going to disagree and say a year is a long time. Especially if you’ve invited them. They probably are jealous. I feel like sometimes my friends are jealous of me. When you make big, positive steps in your life, people will be jealous. I know my friends have been of me. And I have been of them a little here and there. It’s natural. But real friends will get over their jealousy and support you and congratulate you, etc.

So maybe invite them for dinner and just haev a good time. If they don’t come, then you did good and you invited them…so move on and spend time with people who do appreciate you and support you 🙂

Congratulations on your new home!!

Post # 9
1227 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

You said they could come by any time, but did you specifically invite them over, as in, “Come to dinner on Wednesday!” If you haven’t specifically invited them to come over, they may just be being polite. I know that I don’t ever just randomly go over to my friends’ houses. In fact, I would probably be a little flustered if someone randomly stopped by – I mean, usually my house is in a little bit of disarray, and I would be embarassed for friends to see it on a normal day when I haven’t cleaned it up really well.

Why not have a housewarming party and invite them all over to that?

Post # 10
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It sucks but sometimes friends don’t really know how to show support and happiness for others.

I definately agree with PPs that if they are in a different place in their lives, they really don’t “get” what a big deal buying a home is and putting work into is.

The same goes for planning a wedding. One of FI’s friends is the most immature guy I know and he really does not get that weddings are A. Expensive and B. Not about just getting drunk for free. No matter what we say, he just doesn’t get it. But, he very cleary shows jealously towards Fiance for getting married (this friend is single and very much wants a gf).

It’s a bummer when friends are super supportive but don’t let it get to you, you have bigger and better things to think about 🙂

Post # 11
3587 posts
Sugar bee

Sometimes ppl are jealous of what they don’t have, but think they SHOULD have. I bought my home alone (I do have an SO.), and some of my married friends and family didn’t say anything.Not a word! I guess single women aren’t supposed to buy houses alone or they just felt put off by it. I don’t care either way. My real friends and family cared, just like I care when they bought or will buy their homes.

Post # 12
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@SoontobeMsL: Wow that’s a long time. Your friends probably don’t get what a big accomplishment that is. But I know it sucks looking! 😉 So, congrats again!

Post # 13
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

We have some friends that distance themselves. We heard through the grapevine that some very good friends of DH’s said he was acting like he was too good for them. Although he never changed, just his salary did. It’s can be interesting they way material things can change people. I’m not sure however if it really was us that changed (i don’t think that was the case) or just that they became jealous.

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