(Closed) Do you follow the traditional roles?

posted 10 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Who wears the "pants" in the house?



    neither (we both share the responsibilities)


  • Post # 3
    3563 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    It really depends what you mean by “the pants”…I would say that I handle the scheduling of our activities and our household (cooking, cleaning, etc). He makes more money and is the breadwinner. As for big decisions, we make all of those together, so I guess we share the pants? We each get a leg 🙂 

    Post # 4
    18628 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We don’t really have a head of household.  We make decisions together.  I am sort of the CFO of the relationship though, I deal with the financial stuff.

    Post # 5
    806 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I guess I’m the “head of household” by that definition- big decisions (planning, financial, etc) generally go through me.  He’s happy to let someone else take the lead on that kind of stuff.  I ask him what he thinks we should do and sometimes he has ideas, but it’s not like he’s going to proactively start researching the best mortgage or auto loan or whatever.

    But we both earn the same amount.

    I don’t really think of myself as “head of household.”

    Post # 6
    2299 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I’m a housewife and my husband works two jobs. I handle the cooking and cleaning, grocery shopping, etc… He decides what bills to pay and when. He’s way better at handling money so I leave that part to him:) We have very traditional views on how how the household should be run.

    Post # 7
    1221 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    DH & I make decisions together, especially big ones. As far as chores, I take care of the cooking and cleaning because DH works and I don’t. When I was working we both would do our share of chores.

    I guess I wasn’t really brought up w/ “traditional” roles. I always saw that decisions and the such were made together, and whatever needed to be done around the house got done, it didn’t matter by whom.

    Post # 8
    1937 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    We make decisions together, but even more so with the big decisions.  I’m still finishing up school, but I will make significantly more when I graduate.  We’ve talked about it, and we don’t expect that will affect our day-to-day relationship though.

    Post # 9
    9050 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    DH makes more money than I do, but I’m the “long range planner” and CFO of the relationship.  We discuss things, but I tend to be more analytical, and DH is happy to coast.

    Post # 10
    1480 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I currently earn more, so I take on more of the financial responsibilities, but everything else is split equally and we make decisions together.

    Post # 11
    7768 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    It definitely does depend what you mean by pants.  I am sort of the “manager,” because DH works all the time- so I manage other things like bills and cleaning, budgets, goals, life plans, ideas for improving our lives, things like that.  I am the brains, he is the brawn.  We make decisions together.  He also cooks a lot, when is has the time, and will help with cleaning if he is available and I ask him to.  We both have equal but different roles.

    Post # 12
    10283 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    For the most part we share the responsibilities but I guess if we had to pick a “head of household”, Fiance would be it. He makes more than double what I make but we make all of our financial decisions together, as a team. 

    Post # 13
    19 posts

    I’m on the same page with hilsy85 (each getting a leg – very cute!) While I am very traditional and old-fashioned, I don’t believe in the man having all the say or the “barefoot & pregnant” thing. We both have our roles, if you will, as he is the breadwinner and I’m a housewife (I take care of the cooking/cleaning – but he’ll help if I ask). The big decisions, however, we make together, although he handles the money because that’s his forte. I do believe the man should be a man (be the breadwinner and be strong for his family) and the woman, while I’m all for women having careers if that’s what they want, should also take care of the household (just my opinion!) But we are equals. I think it’s very unusual for a woman to be a breadwinner and the man to stay at home, but everyone has to find what works best for them. As long as one doesn’t control the other! I love how they say in My Big Fat Greek Wedding- the man is the head but the woman is the neck, and the neck controls any which way she wants the head to go 🙂

    Post # 14
    4544 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Hmmm…well DH is an accountant so he handles all of our finances, however we both make financial decisions as a team. He tends to cook more (I prefer to bake) and we both clean up whenever it’s neaded.

    Post # 15
    1295 posts
    Bumble bee

    I voted neither because we both share the responsibilites.  We run major decisions through each other before we decide anything.  We both look at the relationship as 50/50 and us both being equals.  Although my SO always says he wears the  pants in the relationship and I just laugh at him.  I think that’s his way of stroking his ego because we both know that’s not true.

    Post # 16
    967 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2008

    We’re a team. 

    The topic ‘Do you follow the traditional roles?’ is closed to new replies.

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