Post # 1
I got married in August – there were about 6 or 7 couples that didn’t give us gifts. We have a wedding in a few months for a couple that didn’t give us a gift. Should we give them one? Typically I would give a gift, but for some reason I don’t feel like I should give anything huge to a couple that didn’t even give us a card.
Post # 3
i would give a gift (because thats how i was raised) but i most probably would spend less than the usual $200+ i usually gift for weddings
Post # 4
@eloping: I was going to say the same, but with a $30-$50 range.
I’ve never spent $200 on a wedding gift. Or you can just give them a nice card with a message inside. I’d have a hard time giving an expensive gift if I didn’t feel like the person really put effort into the friendship, and them not even giving a card gives the impression they aren’t putting forth effort.
Post # 5
i would still give a gift. i invited a friend to our wedding, who didn’t rsvp, didnt come (which i didnt expect her to) and didnt even send a card. she told me a few days ago, that she is now engaged. the first thing i did was get her a congratulations card and mail it to her. just because someone else has dropped the etiquette ball, doesn’t mean you have to follow suit.
Post # 6
Wow! Can we be friends, please? 🙂
In all seriousness, though, I think that you should be the bigger person. Bigger, mind you – not biggest. Bring a card and/or a small gift. You’ll cover your butt, you won’t feel vindictive, and you may even give them a little lesson in class.
Post # 7
I’m all about “not dropping the etiquette ball”, but when I’m used to giving gifts in the $250-$300 range, its also about the “money ball” – lol – I might just give less than I typically would, but still give something.
Post # 8
They attended your wedding without giving a gift? If so, I would be absolutely offended by the severity of their pure tackiness.
I would either go and give a very inexpensive gift with a card or, more likely, I would not attend and just send a card and maybe a small gift.
Post # 9
I feel as you do, regarding not getting them something big, but I would give some sort of token of congratulations. There may have been a reason they were unable to give you a gift for your wedding.
Post # 10
I’m not sure what their reason would be – He works for the family business and just got a new Mercedes and she also has a job. Unfortunatley declining the wedding isn’t an option as its one of my husband’s good friends, which makes it all the bit more weird they didn’t even get a card or anything.
Post # 11
i would take a gift, but something inexpensive
Post # 12
I’m not sure what their reason would be
if hes anything like my husbands side of the family, before we married his mother took care of that stuff (greek family) and once we married i take care of it
or sadly like so many people these days they just didnt think – gift etiquette is a dying thing these days
Post # 13
Etiquette-wise you should give a gift. However, I’m all about treating people in a way similar so the way that they treat me! They had the opportunity to set the present-giving standard, and they failed. I would give a card, and maybe a teeny gift if you are feeling generous.
Post # 14
I dont think you need to bring a gift. Just a card. But their gift could have got lost in the mail. Guys dont really give gifts to eachother or think about gifts. If it is your husbands friend he probably just never thought about it.
Post # 15
WAIT they ATTENDED your wedding… and didnt give a card? or they couldnt make it to your wedding????
Post # 16
ditto mrstilly! i would spend $30-50