(Closed) Do you give a gift if you didn’t receive one?

posted 7 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i would give a gift (because thats how i was raised) but i most probably would spend less than the usual $200+ i usually gift for weddings

 

Post # 4
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@eloping: I was going to say the same, but with a $30-$50 range.

I’ve never spent $200 on a wedding gift. Or you can just give them a nice card with a message inside. I’d have a hard time giving an expensive gift if I didn’t feel like the person really put effort into the friendship, and them not even giving a card gives the impression they aren’t putting forth effort.

Post # 5
Member
962 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

i would still give a gift.  i invited a friend to our wedding, who didn’t rsvp, didnt come (which i didnt expect her to) and didnt even send a card.  she told me a few days ago, that she is now engaged.  the first thing i did was get her a congratulations card and mail it to her.  just because someone else has dropped the etiquette ball, doesn’t mean you have to follow suit.

Post # 6
Member
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@eloping:

Wow! Can we be friends, please? 🙂

In all seriousness, though, I think that you should be the bigger person. Bigger, mind you – not biggest. Bring a card and/or a small gift. You’ll cover your butt, you won’t feel vindictive, and you may even give them a little lesson in class.

Post # 8
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

They attended your wedding without giving a gift? If so, I would be absolutely offended by the severity of their pure tackiness.

I would either go and give a very inexpensive gift with a card or, more likely, I would not attend and just send a card and maybe a small gift. 

Post # 9
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I feel as you do, regarding not getting them something big, but I would give some sort of token of congratulations. There may have been a reason they were unable to give you a gift for your wedding. 

Post # 11
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

i would take a gift, but something inexpensive

Post # 12
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m not sure what their reason would be

if hes anything like my husbands side of the family, before we married his mother took care of that stuff (greek family) and once we married i take care of it

or sadly like so many people these days they just didnt think – gift etiquette is a dying thing these days

 

Post # 13
Member
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

Etiquette-wise you should give a gift.  However, I’m all about treating people in a way similar so the way that they treat me!  They had the opportunity to set the present-giving standard, and they failed.  I would give a card, and maybe a teeny gift if you are feeling generous.

Post # 14
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I dont think you need to bring a gift.  Just a card.  But their gift could have got lost in the mail.  Guys dont really give gifts to eachother or think about gifts.  If it is your husbands friend he probably just never thought about it.

Post # 15
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2011

WAIT they ATTENDED  your wedding… and didnt give a card? or they couldnt make it to your wedding????

Post # 16
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

ditto mrstilly! i would spend $30-50

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