(Closed) do you go out without your SO?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: do you go out without your so?
    yes : (127 votes)
    88 %
    no : (13 votes)
    9 %
    i would never do that! : (5 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    893 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Yep. I go out without my SO! We both need time with our friends separately from eachother sometimes.

    Post # 4
    Member
    576 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    We go out separately more often then we go out together. I like going to bar or a coffee shop with the girls, while he’d rather play video games at a friends house. lol. 

    I definitely think he has to chill and not make you feel guilty for going out without him.

    Post # 5
    Member
    442 posts
    Helper bee

    @stephanie63087: I go out without my SO when something comes up like a girls night out or something.  Why is your SO upset?

    Post # 6
    Member
    1126 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I absolutely do!  He doesn’t like to do girly things or hang out with a bunch of women, so I go out dancing and drink martinis with my girlfriends plenty.  He actually had to work on Halloween this year, and I went to a party by myself, which was a little weird.  But it was all mutual friends and I was excited about it.  And I ended up staying out really late because I was having a blast.

    I love my Fiance, but if I only hung out with him every night, I’d get very antsy very quickly.

    Post # 8
    Member
    78 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    We very rarely go out without each other.  The only time we do is if it is for a bacholer/ette party or something.  But if we were invited out together, we decline or accept together.

    Post # 9
    Member
    827 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I love my Fiance, but sometimes I just want to go out with my sister, or my friends.  He could care less.  He’s happy that he then gets a guys night 🙂 

    Post # 10
    Member
    177 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @stephanie63087: Go! Have fun! An intimate relationship shouldn’t be the only relationship in your life. If he makes you feel bad or guilty, I would have a serious conversation about it.

    Post # 11
    Member
    714 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    Yes.  I go to the occasional happy hour after work or out with friends and he occasionally grabs a beer with a buddy or two and its fine. 

    I doubt either of us would be comfortable if the other made a habit of hanging out in bars frequently or for long periods of time but that’s never been an issue.  I think you just need to reassure you’re guy you’re going to hang out with your friend and not to get picked up and if anyone tries, they’ll get shot down!

    Post # 12
    Member
    820 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    Personally I go out often without my hubby, and he does the same. (By often I mean maybe 1-2x/month each). Of course we go out together too but we both like having “girls nights” or “boys nights.” His usually consist of poker nights or local bars with the boys, while mine are usually dinner/drinks or clubbing. It works for us, what can I say. I don’t think it’s a big deal at all. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    222 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I do occoasionally go out for Girls Night, but I don’t make it a habit and I don’t drink much anymore. If you go every Wednesday, I could see why he wouldn’t want you to go, but if it’s a “once in a blue moon” thing then you should go for it!

    In his defense, I get bummed when my SO goes out without me when I can’t. I tend to sulk around the house and feel sorry for myself. Mainly because I don’t want to fall asleep alone and I don’t want skanky little girls throwing themselves at my man at the bar.

    Ask him why he doesn’t want you to go, consider his reasons and then make your decision. If he is just being a big baby, then go out with your girlfriends! HAVE FUN!!!

    Post # 14
    Member
    641 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @MissShork:  that’s us, too.  He will go to a friends and hang out, and I will go out to a bar with my friends and then we will meet at home later. 

    He doesn’t really like the places my girlfriends and I like to go, so he will pass on going out with us.  I don’t mind going out with his friends though:)

    Post # 15
    Member
    141 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Usually we go out together, but sometimes I do go out without my SO when he’s not feeling up to it or I want to see a girl friend. I am a bit more extraverted than he is and I need more social time in my life to be happy. He used to get upset that I want to go out sometimes without him, but once we talked about it and he figured out that I just need more social interaction, he gets it. I think it’s important to maintain your independence and get out on your own sometimes!  

    Post # 16
    Member
    442 posts
    Helper bee

    @stephanie63087: I don’t see why its a problem if your not exclusively trying to shut him out.  You said that he declined to go with you due to work obligations the next morning.  Does that mean that you have to stay home and sit next to him and watch tv?  It shouldn’t IMO.  I think as long as your keeping a balance between him and the rest of your life he should be fine that.

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