(Closed) Do you go to bed together/at the same time?

posted 5 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: Do you go to bed together?
    Yes. : (226 votes)
    64 %
    No. : (126 votes)
    36 %
  • Post # 91
    Member
    2460 posts
    Buzzing bee

    My fiance and I are literally on opposite schedules. He sleeps normally and I sleep during the day. I hate it, but on nights I have off we try to but it really depends. If he is up doing something and I haven’t slept all day because Im off that night (still worked the night before) and wanted to spend time with him. I’m normally pass out at 7or 8ish. And that’s not fair to make him sleep at that time. Lol I absolutely hate our arrangement though. I would love to wake up with him and go to sleep with him everyday. Maybe once I get a new job it’ll work 🙂

    Post # 92
    Member
    29 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: January 2016

    Why not just go to bed when you each feel like it? My parents have been married for 47 years and I don’t think they ever slept at the same times. He’d stay up watching tv in the family room, she’d doze off watching tv in her bedroom. I don’t understand the need for uniformity when it comes to sleeping together. Me and fiancee don’t live together but when she stats over and I stay over her place we have our own way of doing things. Maybe I’m different but me and fiancée have different energy levels. I like to stay up late, she likes to turn in early. Typically we’ll cuddle and watch tv or hang out and when she’s ready for bed, I let her be and do my own thing Until I turn in. To each their own.

    Post # 93
    Member
    2123 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2017

    Most of the time. There has been a few occasions when I’ve gone before him because I’ve felt unwell or I couldn’t sit up all night watching the Oscars like he could. I love going to bed together. I wouldn’t change it, it’s sweet. I work the odd night shift so sometimes we don’t get the option but that’s rather different. 

    Post # 94
    Member
    442 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2015 - City, State

    We try to go to bed together since we are on the same schedule. But I usually end up getting into bed about 20 minutes before he does. Although it takes him longer to get out of bed in the mornings and is always rushing to get out the door with me!! We commute together btw!

    Post # 95
    Member
    606 posts
    Busy bee

    MrsMY:  We go to bed together, even when we aren’t together we call eachother to head to bed and say good night before settling in. We’ve always done it, we have roughly the same schedule….and we like it. It’s also something marriage counsellors say to do….bonding or something. lol. I dunno.

    Post # 96
    Member
    2348 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’m a night owl and I freelance from home. My husband has to wake up very early for work so he goes to bed around 11 and I’m usually up until 2 or 3. We have lots of afternoon sex or even pre-dinner sex so it doesn’t negatively affect our intimacy at all. 

    Post # 97
    Member
    1023 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    We usually do, but if for some reason my Fiance has to go to bed before me, I usually try to go to bed with him and vice versa. If he falls asleep and I’m still wide awake, then I’ll get up… That way we still have those moments together to talk and whatnot!

    Post # 98
    Member
    3471 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

    MrsMY:  We are 50/50.  Some nights we got to bed together, others not.  It’s been more commonly not lately since I got pregnant but then again, bedtime can be as early as 7-8pm for me right now. 

    He’s usually a night owl, but goes to bed around 10 in order to wake up for work.  I go to bed between 9-10 naturally (prepregnancy) so we’d usually be pretty close.  A lot of nights, when I lay down he’ll kiss me goodnight then go shower before joining me.  Other nights he’ll stay up on his computer until midnight or later doing all sorts of things. It doesn’t really bother me either way as long as he doesn’t keep me up with the TV or anything. 

    Post # 99
    Member
    369 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I’d say 90-95% of the time we do; the only exceptions are if he is working really late and I have to be up early the next day, or if I’m up working to a deadline and he has to be up early the next day. 

    Post # 100
    Member
    1324 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    most of the time, yes. 

    Post # 101
    Member
    415 posts
    Helper bee

    We always go to bed at the same time.

    However we often wake up at different times. Sometimes he wakes up earlier, sometimes it’s me. Don’t know why!

    Post # 102
    Member
    255 posts
    Helper bee

    I didn’t vote because we try and go to bed together 50% of the time during the week and we always go to bed together during the weekend. I have a long commute and then have classes at night, so im worn out and go to bed a little earlier some nights. He stays up and watches TV or plays video games until he’s ready for bed. It works for us.

    Post # 103
    Member
    22 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    Not in over a year….Im on day shift (7-3) and he is on nights (11-7).

    He goes to bed around 8 in the morning. I go to bed about 10 at night when he is leaving.  We tried on the weekends but changing schedules was “painful”.

    Post # 104
    Member
    998 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2015 - City Hall!

    95% Of the time we go to bed together. There is the occasion where I go to bed first (migraine, or he is in the middle of researching some thing) if he goes to bed first I always come in bed with him even if I’m up for hours. 

    Post # 105
    Member
    604 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    Yes, and I love it! We used to work completely separate schedules and never even sleep in the same bed (he would fall asleep on the couch and I would wake him up to get into bed when I left for work in the morning). We are so much closer now that we always go to bed together, I wouldn’t go back to the old way for a million bucks.

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