(Closed) Do You Have To Stay Where Your Guests Stay?

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Do You Have To Stay Where Your Guests Stay?
    Yes : (0 votes)
    No : (30 votes)
    100 %
  • Post # 3
    155 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I personally don’t think it’s rude.

    We’re planning on staying at a different hotel. We blocked rooms at the hotel for the guests because it was a reasonable rate. I’ll be staying there the night before the wedding. However, we found an amazing deal at my favorite hotel in town for our wedding night. And I kinda think it’s a bit weird if my family wants to be near me on my wedding night.

    Post # 4
    1074 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @yellowshoe:  I don’t think it is.  Where I grew up there were reasonably priced ordinary motels like Days Inn, Ramada, etc in one general price range and then there was a massive price leap for upscale hotels and inns.  Guests understood the bride and groom wanting something more honeymoon oriented and appreciated staying at the more reasonably priced places.

    Post # 5
    240 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I would think that you can do whatever is easier for the bride and groom (sorry i dont believe in etiquette). My Fiance & I will be staying at the same hotel with our guest because its easier and so that we can spend more time with them at the after party. However we will be on another floor 🙂

    Post # 6
    7439 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Well I believe in Etiquette…

    BUT I am happy to tell you there is no rule on this.  You (and your Guests) can stay wherever they wish… be it a spot you recommend or somewheres else.

    Personally, on my Wedding Night, I wouldn’t be so keen to stay at the same location… I so do not want to have to get up and have breakfast in the Restaurant, and see anyone who is thinking “I know what they did last night” (ick)

    If I did choose to stay in the same Hotel (say it was the same as my Venue, therefore I’m getting the room for FREE)… I’d be very very clear in my pre-planning contact with the Hotel, to state that I didn’t want to be staying anywhere in the building near my Guests (especially Moms & Dads). 

    For example, You can put them all up on Floors 1 to 10, Mr Right and I will be in the Penthouse !!

    Just my 2 cents


    Post # 8
    2223 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Not at all. We’re staying at the hotel our wedding is at and our guests are staying across the street. Why? Our room is almost $300 a night and literally 1/2 block away the other hotel is $180 a night and our guests aren’t too hot about paying almost double to be 100ft closer to us. 🙂 It’s fine. Do what you need to do.

    Post # 9
    7439 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    @yellowshoe:  YES another good reason… not the first time I’ve heard such stories.

    Which is a good reason to keep where you are going a secret… there are some people who have some stupid ideas or incredible lack of tact sometimes when it comes to Honeymoons and a couple’s right to privacy


    Post # 10
    798 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I definitely don’t think that you have to stay wherever your guests are staying.  It might be easier if you’re doing brunch the next day with people (if it’s at the hotel) or for picking up gifts that have been transported from the venue, but it’s definitely not necessary.

    One thing I will say (and this might have just been my situation), but if you have a lot of people coming from out of town who may have sticker shock on hotel prices, even with the great deal that you have negotiated for them, you may want to stay where they are for appearances sake.  

    We had a lot of people coming from a very small town or an area where hotels are rarely over $80 a night.  We managed to get rooms at an old major hotel in downtown Toronto for around $130-160.  For us and for people who know the area, this was a great deal, but for the people used to paying $80, it was a lot.  We did get asked a couple of times if we were staying there and I got the feeling that if we had said no, it would have been awkward.  Because of this, we also put hotels at cheaper price points on our website, but the main hotel was the big one (it was closest to our venue).

    It’s definitely not rude, as long as you would stay at the hotel that you’ve booked (as in, it’s nice enough for you).

    Post # 11
    1438 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    we are making it a point NOT to stay at the same hotel.  We will have some of them joining us for brunch the next morning somewhere. 


    Post # 12
    717 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    Why would we be staying at a hotel, anyway? I mean, we might stay at a hotel the night before, so the ladies can get ready and then the guys, but we were just going to seek out inexpensive rooms for that. And our guests are choosing their own hotels. We don’t plan on blocking rooms for them. So, it wouldn’t be planned if we did happen to land up at the same place.

    As for the honeymoon night, we don’t even know yet. But, like I said, the guests will probably be scattered.


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