Post # 1
So I just finished printing my save the date envelopes and now I’m wondering if I should have included “& Guest” on the envelopes for the singles we are inviting with guests so they can have a heads up that they get a +1, or if they should just be on the inner envelopes (or whatever insert I end up using) of the actual invitations?
It seemed weird to put them on the envelope to show to the world, but now I’m second guessing myself…
Post # 3
I didn’t, for a few reasons. First of all, I wanted to make sure that we would be able to let everyone have a plus one, and a year out was too soon for us to tell. Secondly, I didn’t want to just put ‘and guest’ on the envelope if it was someone I knew well, but I also didn’t want to risk them breaking up and then feeling awkward later on.
Post # 4
Yep I put and guest.
The point of save the dates is so that your guests can buy plane tickets. How will they know if their girlfriends and fiancees aren’t invited too?
We gave everyone a plus one (except for widowed grandparents or divorced aunts)
Post # 5
We only gave “and guests” to people whose names we could put on the envelopes. For example, we invited my cousin and her very longtime boyfriend. Some of my cousins would look for the nearest available girl and use it as a date. If space allows, we’ll allow our single guests to bring +1’s and will list them as “Mr. Joseph Smith and Guest” on the invitation envelope.
Post # 6
Do you mean truly single, or single as in the IRS not yet married standard, where the person may have a Fiance, long-term SO or live-in SO? As a guest, I beg that those partnered but IRS single where you plan to invite the partners, you put their names on the envelopes as well. I’ve needed to make plane flights before where I had to awkwardly reach out to the bride to find out if my live-in SO of several years was invited or not.
Post # 7
If someone is completely single, and you want to give them a guest, they won’t be concerned about finding a guest 6 months before the wedding! (If they’re engaged or very serious with someone, it would be nice to put that other person’s name. If they’re more casually dating someone… I think same as my first sentence.)
Post # 8
@o0olibelulao0o:I waiting for the real invites before I added “and guest.”
ETA: If I knew their guest, I’d write both names. If I didn’t, I’d let them call and ask. I didn’t want people scrounging for a guest if they saw that on the save-the-date.
Post # 9
@kay01: no, if I knew the name of their significant other it was put on the envelope, live-in bf/gf or not, if they’ve been together for a while they are on the envelope… The ones that we do not know if they have a significant bf/gf or if they are truely single we just addressed it to them…
I just felt weird addressing an envelope with “& Guest” if I didn’t know who they wanted to bring and thought I should just put that on the actual invitation, but now I’m second guessing myself… lol
Post # 10
We didnt include and guest on the STD’s for our single friends. We waited until invites went out and then included that on the actual invitation of course. Idk really why we did it that way, Im not sure I had a reason. lol
Post # 11
I haven’t really thought about it because we are only doing +1’s for people who we know well enough to know their name. I don’t think it is totally necessary, but it might be nice. I got invited to a friend’s wedding recently and she put “and guest” on the save-the-date. It didn’t really matter, but it was nice to know my fiance was invited before the invite came!
Post # 12
I did not include “and guest” on my STD’s. I’ve read that it isn’t necessary because it’s an informal reminder. When you send out your actual invitation, you can include it but it’s not necessary for the STD’s.
Post # 13
I just asked this question a week or 2 ago here 🙂 The answer that I was thinking and made the most sense was ‘No’ – why do you send a STD to an unknown person? If I knew the person’s SO then they were added to the envelope but if the invitation was going to say “and guest” then I just put the actual invitee’s name.
ETA: here is the link to my thread for some more opinions 🙂
Post # 14
You don’t put the phrase “and Guest” on anything is the etiquettely correct response.
STD’s are not a required part of an invitation suite. They are meant only to be sent to guests that you cannot dream of having them miss the wedding. Like you sister or best friend from highschool. Not every flavour of the month that your cousin is dating (even if they will be invited to the wedding).
Post # 15
I voted other because similar to someone else our “and guest” is for people that we actually can name who are either engaged or who have been in an extremely long term relationship. For example, my cousin who I’m sure will bring his fling of the week will get a plus one (only because he’s family) but we’re not handing out plus ones to everyone but on his save the date it says Mrs.B’s Cousin…. ONLY….. Not Mrs. B’s Cousin and Skank of the Week. Our rule so far has been single bridal party is getting a plus one no matter what, engaged people, and people who have been in LOOOOOONG term relationships. I’m sure that (extremely close) family will probably get plus one (but not on STDs).