(Closed) Do You Invite Out of Towners to a Bridal Shower?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I went back & forth about this, too. Most of our Out of Town guests are on my fiance’s side. From that side, we just decided to invite my Mother-In-Law & his aunt (whom we’re close with and go out with about once a week). They knew it was just a gesture & they were not expected to fly out for it.

Since the shower was thrown by my BMs, I decided to invite all my aunts & female cousins. I didn’t want to leave anyone out since we are all pretty close & I didn’t want anyone offended. Only a few were from Out of Town. 

I didn’t invite any friends from Out of Town, because that seemed like a gift grab to me, and I knew they wouldn’t be offended by not being invited.

Post # 4
16195 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I sent invites to my Out of Town friends knowing full well that they wouldn’t be able to make it. I just wanted them to feel included, and that’s how they interpreted the invite. They didn’t see it as a gift grab.

ETA: A couple of my Out of Town friends did make the trip (because they’re awesome). If that makes a difference.

Post # 5
1046 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I invited pretty much all the Out of Town family (no friends) because I knew they’d be more offended by not being invited than they would by feeling like they’d be gift grabbed.  None of them came (or even rsvp’d…/fail family) but no one can b**ch that they were excluded.

Post # 6
1101 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I am going to invite all Out of Town, I know most wont make it and some will, but I’d rather invite them then not at all. It’s all family also.

Post # 7
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Gemstone:  I hope no one thinks I’m saying that inviting Out of Town friends IS a gift grab. I realize that’s what it sounded like. We just felt that way because we had already invited our Out of Town guests to our engagement party, and we just felt like another invite we knew they would decline would be over the top lol. I’m sorry, I guess I should have clarified our reasoning (also, our “OOT” guests are either out of country, or live in MT where flights are ridiculously expensive, so no way would they attend the shower). 🙂

Post # 8
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

We’re inviting all of FI’s out of town family. I already know that none of them can make it, but like murmur said, no one can gripe that we didn’t invite them.

Out of town friends- I’m going to let two know, just in case they’re in the area, but I don’t want them to feel like they should send a gift or anything.

Definitely invite Future Mother-In-Law. Yes, the party’s only a few hours, but she might like the time to get caught up to speed on wedding stuff, or to spend time with you and Fiance.

Post # 9
7901 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

According to etiquette, you are supposed to invite everyone you would invite if in an ideal world they could come. You are supposed to disregard distance, other known commitments, etc.

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