(Closed) Do you “invite” your vendors?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
829 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Im with you as well… do we pay to feed them as well as pay them and tip? The whole thing is quite confusing to me

Post # 4
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

you’re supposed to invite your officiant- friend or not. our ceremony musician is a friend, as is my hair person, so we are inviting them with an official invite.

Post # 5
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I think the general consesus is that it’s nice to invite your officiant (and I think a lot of people do) but they won’t be offended if they don’t receive an invitation to stay unless they know your family.

We LOVED our officiant. She went above and beyond for us, and she truly cared, but we simply couldn’t afford to pay for any more people at our reception. We allowed her to stay for cocktail hour to snack and have a drink (shhh, our venue didn’t know), and she mingled for a little while, and left 45 mins in. We have her a nice tip on top of what we had already paid her. She never seemed ungrateful,

I think the modern trend is just that … officiants understand that if they’re a perfect stranger, and you pay/tip them for their services, an invite isn’t expected. I can’t imagine why an officiant would want to attend the wedding of strangers anyway, you know?

Post # 6
Member
330 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

You do not have to send an invite to your photographer.  However, if you would like your ceremony musician, florist (or any other vendor who will not be working beyond the ceremony) to attend your reception as a guest, then yes, you send them an invitation.  Basically, anyone working @ the reception doesn’t need an invite (photog/videographer, DJ/Band, DOC, etc.).  If you are friends with your musician, it would be a nice gesture to invite him/her. 

Typically, yes, you do invite your officiant (and his/her spouse) to the reception (as well as the Rehearsal Dinner in some instances). 

 

@Jizes – yes, it is reccommended to feed your vendors (most venues will offer a half price vendor meal for the vendors who are working your wedding).  And tipping is customary for good service. 

Post # 8
Member
4485 posts
Honey bee

No. They have business contracts with you. The only time they would be invited is if they would be attending anyway as a guest, such as family/friends providing a service.

Post # 9
Member
342 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

In my experience only officiants are formally sent an invitation.  The other vendors are working (DOC, photographer, band/dj, etc.)and should have formal contracts with you, so they do not need to get an invite.  They should all be fed though!

Post # 10
Member
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

We are going to be inviting our officiant officially, as he is a family friend! My hair stylist is also getting a formal invite, as she is a friend now that she has done my hair for 9 years! Other than that, no one else is getting a formal invite…they are vendors! But, of course, they are being fed!

Post # 11
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

Yes, don’t forget to feed your vendors! They all have blogs now 🙂

Post # 12
Member
1060 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010 - Anela Garden Chapel & Japanese Cultural Center, Honolulu

We’re inviting our officiant, and also our photog. I agree in feeding your vendors!

Post # 13
Member
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Our officiant is the pastor from our church. He’s doing our wedding ceremony for free as long as we are good Christians and are faithful to church. He’s also giving us free marriage counseling. So we feel obligated to invite him and his family. My Fiance doesn’t really want him to go because he says that he might have an opinion about the going ons in our wedding… But I want to. 

As for the photographer and other vendors unless you know them personally it’s not really required to send them an official invite.

Post # 14
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Our hair dresser is invited (she’s the best man’s wife).  Our officiant is invited (he’s another close friend of ours).  We are also inviting our ceremony musician, although she wasn’t on our original guest list.  She is the niece of our close family friends, and we often spend Thanksgiving and Hannukah with their family, including the niece.  So we figured it would be the right thing to invite her, once we decided that she would be our ceremony musician.

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