(Closed) Do You Know Any Real Life Narcissists?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 61
Member
385 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

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suziq5ft2:  I just wanted to comment on what your bro said about signing a prenup. Your brother does indeed sound like a narcissist; however I agree with him on a pre-nup (if either you or your fiance or both of you already have assets like a house). I don’t feel that prenups are a trust destroyer-they are actually the opposite because in signing one, you will know that you fiance is marrying you for YOU, and not for what they can get out of you.

They aren’t the most romantic thing in the world I know; but with the divorce rate at 50%, you have to protect yourself. If neither of you have assets or property going into the marriage, then a pre-nup isn’t really a big deal. But if you do, then it’s a good idea to protect yourself with one in the event the marriage goes south (you NEVER know how things will be in 5 or 10 years). I just think your brother is looking out for you when he brings it up, that’s all.

Post # 62
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1609 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

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Coral99:  I have a friend who I believe to be a narcissist. She lives thousands of miles away now. I’ve distanced myself over the years as our friendship has always been more about her than me. About 10 years ago I was going through a rough time as my chosen career path (teaching) wasn’t working out. I was pretty miserable for about a year as I had the teaching year from hell. She told me at that time that she didn’t want to hang out with me anymore because I was such a downer. Yet she expected everyone to come running when she was sad about something.

Post # 63
Member
1065 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

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allyfally: Ugh, I do the same thing!

I was an only child and spent heappps of time alone so it took me years longer than most people to figure out society.

I still get really awkward when there is an awkward silence, and I just start telling a story about myself.  I would like to ask questions, but I don’t know what to ask? I’m fine with friends, but struggle with aquantainces/strangers.  I’m getting better though 🙂

I definitely had many narcissist traits as  a child.  When I realised no one liked me, I changed that.  I was that child that bosses everyone around and thinks they are the best at everything.

Post # 64
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

I have a friend who I believe is absolutely a narcissist. This person puts a lot of importance on their own feelings, especially if they believe someone has wronged them – then it’s a disaster and there is anger, hurt, shame, you name it….BUT if someone else has an issue they are completely unable to show empathy. Like literally, it’s a blank stare. Then the topic immediately goes back to them. It amazes me because of the contrast between how seriously this person takes their own feelings vs how unable they are to tap into anyone elses.

Post # 65
Member
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

My mom. Everything is always about her, she’s always the victim, everyone is out to get her, etc. It’s frustrating and tiring. If something is not all about her then she’s not interested, she will literally cut off the conversation if it has nothing to do with her. I took her to see where we are building our new house and all she could do was talk about how she wants a new house and all of the things she wants. They’re not even moving.

Post # 66
Member
1722 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1998

orchidaloha, hey. I hear you on having a narcissistic mom (and as far as parents go, having a narcissistic mother seems much more common; I think narcissism is more common in women in general, though).

My mom’s narcissism is focused around her martyrdom; she works so hard, but gets crapped on (in reality, she refuses sensible help all the way, then insists no one even attempted to help her and things are falling apart anyway and…attention, please!). In her retellings of various stories, everyone around her is a lazy, selfish piece of crap, and she’s a diligent, selfless hard worker. My dad’s her enabler and would allow his family to sit on eggshells while she had one of her usual explosive temper tantrums. No one could ever do anything right, so at a young age, I just stopped helping out around the house. Why bother if you’re just going to get screamed at about how you can’t do anything right?

I hate the bitch. We’re in contact on a limited basis, and she won’t be having much of a relationship with my baby. I am civil and polite to her, but we are not at all close. The extent of our relationship is doing some grocery shopping together. I’ve accepted a superficial relationship. She is much different toward me now that I don’t live with her. If I had to live with her again, I’d sooner tie a noose for myself. It was awful.

My dad’s mom is also a textbook narcissist. While my mom certainly pulled the scapegoat/golden child crap, my grandma takes it to new limits. She’s always hated my dad, but doted on my uncles. They were always complimented every time they visited, given money/gifts/trips/dinners out. Meanwhile, she would sit and criticize my dad, my mom, her grandkids (I was always told that I was fat and ugly…directly in front of my parents, once. They did nothing. Amazing). We were treated like servants. Meanwhile, I had a cousin (another grandson of hers) who was treated as though he was God’s gift to the world. Never did anything for her, but she talked him up like he was amazing.

Had a friend who was also narcissistic. Again, big sense of entitlement, putting people down (especially if he thought they were doing ‘better’ than he was). Looking back on our friendship, he was miserable if he thought I was doing better (and again, would insult me, my accomplishments, etc.). Expected a parade any time he farted, practically. Don’t miss him a bit.

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