(Closed) Do you let him put it "back there?" TMI thread!

posted 4 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 31
Member
592 posts
Busy bee

I can count on one hand how many times I’ve done it. It’s okay but not my thing. 

All I can tell you is that you have to be really relaxed, really turned on and if you’re me, really drunk. 

A lot of the other bees have given great advice though! 

Post # 32
Member
460 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2006

All of your questions are valid and not weird at all. However I would urge you to do a little research on the health/safety risks of anal sex as well as the potential long term complications such as the inability to hold your poop in and anal cancer. It is definitely something you want to decide on after knowing the risks related to it.

Post # 33
Member
663 posts
Busy bee

Did it once with my ex and it hurt like hell. He wasn’t even big and it was still the most painful experience. That was back in hs so since then I had shyed away from it until I got married and my husband really likes touching me back there. It used to be uncomfortable for me, just awkward and sort of embarrassing because I had the same questions/concerns as you which has actually never been an issue. Somehow overtime and persistently trying carefully and stopping when I say so he found a way to make me comfortable with it to where it actually feels good when he touches me now, but then he would always try to stick it in me and that would hurt a lot and freak me out based on my past experience. Again over time he was patient and kind but persistent and as of very recently we completed the act twice and it was pretty freakin’ awesome especially when he finished inside. I can’t do it face down or standing cause it hurts too much but if I’m lying on my back with my legs on either side of him and he is touching me down there while he’s inserting himself back there it works. We did it without additional lube, but just the head which is more than enough and basically we can’t move but it was a good experience. 

Post # 34
Member
2123 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

 

We do it. We haven’t done it in a few months though as our sex life has taken a bit of a dive, sadly. Anal takes me a long time (foreplay etc) and at the moment he doesn’t seem to want to engage in more than a quicky. I miss it, so I hope things get better for us soon in that department.

 

1) It has done, once. It wasn’t very nice, but it was a tiny amount and clean up was easy. Usually the rectum itself is poop free, and you should have been to the bathroom a couple of hours before you engage in anal. However, it’s a butt. Every time you do it there is a slight risk that this could happen. Douching 30 minutes before helps. I do this now, but I didn’t when our little accident happened.

2) No, it doesn’t smell.

3) I douche with lukewarm water only, about 30 minutes or so before play time.

4) Bleaching is to turn the skin lighter. Our skin is naturally darker there. Bleaching is completely ridiculous. Don’t consider it.

5) I personally require a lot of manipulation. Foreplay, fingers, toys, and a lot of time. You need to work on being completely relaxed and going slow. If you try to force it, or you don’t gradually stretch then it’s going to bloody well hurt. You also need a lot of lube. More than you think.

6) He has finished inside me. We are in a committed relationship where neither of us have STIs. It doesn’t cause any problems.

7) You need to check that the lube you intend on using is safe for anal sex. Some contain ingredients that can irritate the thin lining of the back passage. The one we use is water based, very thick and intended to be used anally. We apply it until it’s dripping off the both of us. You really do need a lot.

8) Yes, I do enjoy it. I never imagined I would, but it feels great, different, and he loves it. That really turns me on.

Post # 35
Member
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

This is weird answering these questions but I’m on the internet so YOLO!

We do it at the very most twice a month, but usually just about once a month. It’s something he had categorized as “never gonna happen”…but we got drunk, one thing led to another, and it just kind of happened. So we started incorporating it in every once in a while.

1. Not to my knowledge. I don’t inspect his penis afterwards, and he has never said anything. And I mean, if you think you’re gonna go to the bathroom anytime soon, this is probably a position you should be staying away from. 

2. Again, not to my knowledge, I’ve never smelled anything. 

3. I’ve never done an enema in my life. Nope. 

4. I don’t bleach. I don’t see a need. My bf does not crouch down, open up my cheeks, and stare at my bum hole. That would be weird. O.O 

5. It’s never hurt for me. We take it sssssslllllloooooowwwwwww. And tons of lube all over the place. If it hurts, you’re either doing it all wrong, or it’s something that is just not for you I guess. 

6. Yes, he finishes in there. No medical problems there. 

7. I think we just use a water-based one that we use for everything, nothing special. It works great. 

8. I do enjoy a lot actually. And now I feel awkward for saying it since it seems like most bees on here don’t like it. :/ But I guess I am weird. Like I said, we take it really slow, lots of lube, and usually my bf reaches around to rub the sweet spot while we’re doing this particular deed too. But the actual act itself is pretty nice. Still pretty good old fashioned sex, but anal is a nice, pleasurable switch up once in a while.

Post # 36
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’ve never tried it. But a previous boyfriend was curious (never did it though) so I did some research and talked with a gay friend. 

1) have him wear a condom

2) DO NOT USE LUBE WITH A DESENSITIZER!! You can do a lot of damage if you can’t feel what is going on back there. My friend is into some weird and kinky stuff, but he would never, ever use the desensitizer lube. Just too dangerous. 

3) Start small like fingers, then work your way up. 

Post # 37
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

im so glad someone put this thread up because Fiance has been begging me to do this for so long and im so nervous. this gives me a little more insight

Post # 38
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I love it. Not as much as the ‘front door’, but it’s good. … You could say it’s a #2 OPTION HAHA. But really. I like it. 

Never had leftover on it, and it’s never smelled any different than sex in general as PP have said. I’ve never considered bleaching, I always thought it was a porn star kind of thing lol. Again, echoing others; take it slow, lots of lube, and communicate lots!

Post # 39
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee

Here is my uncensured answers:

 

1) When he takes it out, does it ever have…you know…brown stuff on it?

That happened once, but not much at all. He didn’t mind. Acctually, the first time, “it” acctually dropped out together with his semen, right on his stomach (I was on top). Lol. I was kind of ashamed, but he just laughed and said it was nothing to worry about, and that it was his own fault. Lol. Never happend since, since I know how to avoid it! And we have done it a million times.

2) Does it smell?

Not at all!

3) Do you do enemas to prevent these problems???

Not, that’s not necessary, but I did try that a few times, but it just makes your butthole sore. I don’t recommend that.

4) I’ve never looked at myself down there. I’ve heard about porn actors “bleaching” it. Why does it need bleaching??? To kill bacteria maybe?

It’s to make the darker area lighter, if you take a look down there your anal opening will most likely be darker than the surrounding area, I guess it’s suposed to be prettier when lighter! (If you are a white woman, otherwise it might look a bit off with a white butthole, lol.)

5) How much does it hurt?

Not at all if you are relaxed, turned on and doing it right! Listen to your body!

6) Do you let him ummm, finish there? Can semen cause any medical problems in there??

Yes I do, not what I know of.

7) How much and what kind of lubricant?

99.9% of the times I just spit in my hand! Works just fine!

8) Do YOU actually enjoy it too?

From time to time, when I’m really turned on it’s a pleasure and nothing makes me as horny as that. When we first tried it I wanted to do it like at least 4 times a day for a few weeks! Lol. It’s really enjoyable. But when you do it just to be a “good girlfriend” it’s not as nice. It doesn’t necessarily have to be painful, not at all, if you take it slow in the beginning and if you let your butthole and the following part inside of you relax, but it’s more like “blah”, not fun and you just want it to be over., since you constantly have to remind yourself to relax. That part comes naturally when really turned on.

Sorry for the weird questions!

NP Bee. A good (and nice) tip is that he can always warm you up with a finger before you get started, again, not necessary, but you could see it as “foreplay”. A rimjob is also very nice to recieve! Makes the anal very relaxed and “inviting”. He says this doesn’t taste or small bad either! He claims he can’t feel any smell anything at all. I doubt that, but apparently, either way, it’s nothing that bothers him and he loves to be back there on me! And also, to have traditional sex before you go in through the back door is also a great way to get your body relaxed! Hot tip! And vibrators at your clit at the same time that he’s in there also helps you relax and enjoy it even more!

Just remember to never let him put it back into hole #1 after he’s been in #2! For bacterial reasons! 

 

Now, I wish you both a fun weekend! 

Post # 40
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee

And I just wan’t to say, when you know what you are doing, you won’t NEED either fingers, vibrators or toungs or anything, if you don’t feel like it. Your butt can get ready in a minute just rubbing/massaging his penis against it. But I would recommend you to worm up properly at least the first times you are trying it out.

 

If your butthole or “inside” hurts, you are not relaxed/turned on enough! It doesn’t when you are 100% relaxed. It’s never suppose to hurt! If it does, something is wrong, and he needs to slow down to let you take it in your pace!

 

Good luck!

Post # 41
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee

I am also considering bleaching! If not now then for out wedding night! Lol. He really doesn’t care, has never mentioned anything but positive things about it, but again he doesn’t know what a bleached one looks like, and when I said I want to try he was like “Do what you want, but you really don’t have to do it for me, I love yours as it is!”, and I think it could be a nice surprise! 

 

It’s kind of “our thing” since I lost my butt-virginity to him, and he had never been inside anyones butt before! lol. So it’s kind of special to us, in a silly, playful way. 😀

 

Did I mention he absolutely love it? 

Post # 42
Member
544 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - Not sure

I’ve beer tried it… But I do tell my Fiance I’m saving it for marriage. I just came here to look at comments. 😳 I think I should stathe for medical issues, if you have anal sex, don’t let him put it in your vagina afterwards unless he washes it very well, as it can cause vaginal infections, but im being captain obvious here. Also, one guy I dated said that he tried anal only once. Somehow he got an infection in his penis from it. It wasn’t an STD, but I can’t remember what the name of the infection it was… Idk 

Post # 43
Member
572 posts
Busy bee

cella777:  I’m a huge fan, my Fiance and I do anal pretty regularly

1) When he takes it out, does it ever have…you know…brown stuff on it?

Not usually. My general rule of thumb is if I haven’t pooped earlier in the day, I’m most likely going to decline the offer. There was ONE time he took it out and there was a small turd ball sitting on his dick. We laughed for a while

2) Does it smell?

Never noticed any sort of smells..

3) Do you do enemas to prevent these problems???

Nope. Never

4) I’ve never looked at myself down there. I’ve heard about porn actors “bleaching” it. Why does it need bleaching??? To kill bacteria maybe?

Never done bleaching. No need to

5) How much does it hurt?

It can if your body is not relaxed enough and there’s not enough lube, it can hurt. But its an easy fix, add more lube and breathe! I always lay flat on my stomach and take a few deep breaths and before he enters that way.

6) Do you let him ummm, finish there? Can semen cause any medical problems in there??

Yeah …it’s a funny feeling after ..it feels like a small amount of diarrhea coming out when you go to the bathroom after

7) How much and what kind of lubricant?

We use KY. Lots and lots. Both on the dick and in the booty

8) Do YOU actually enjoy it too?

Yes. And with time, Ive noticed that it gets easier to slide in there as well … no you’re not going to be walking around shitting your pants with a flappy hole!

Also, never go from ass to vagina!!!!!

 

Post # 44
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2016

1) When he takes it out, does it ever have…you know…brown stuff on it?

Nope!

2) Does it smell?

Dunno, I don’t tend to put my face near his shallabang after anal!

3) Do you do enemas to prevent these problems???

I tend to douche and scrub like fury.

4) I’ve never looked at myself down there. I’ve heard about porn actors “bleaching” it. Why does it need bleaching??? To kill bacteria maybe?

Cosmetic.  Not my jam.

5) How much does it hurt?

Depends.  If he’s not very patient and/or there isn’t enough lube, it hurts like hellfire fury.  If it’sdone well, it doesn’t hurt, per se – it’s like a stretching ache.

6) Do you let him ummm, finish there? Can semen cause any medical problems in there??

I do, but we tend to use condoms.  I don’t think there can be, but if anal is done wrong you can cause rectal fissures which are the antithesis of what you want.

7) How much and what kind of lubricant?

We use Durex massage oils

http://www.boots.com/en/Durex-Play-2-in-1-Massage-Gel-200ml_22795/?cm_mmc=bmm-_-google-_-PLAs-_-Boots%20Shopping%20-%20Category%20-%20Health%20and%20Pharmacy

It’s our general all-purpose lube, and its condom safe AND makes a fantastic massage oil!

8) Do YOU actually enjoy it too?

I geniunely do.  It’s like a whole other KIND of intimacy.  It takes a lot of trust and a LOT of communication, but I think it’s totally worth it.

 

Post # 45
Member
40 posts
Newbee

cella777:  

My husband and I do this regularly, but not frequently so I’ll try and answer your questions as best as I can

1) When he takes it out, does it ever have…you know…brown stuff on it?

No, but I’ve never agreed to do it if I hadn’t gone to the bathroom earlier that day to er…make sure things were empty.

2) Does it smell?

No.

3) Do you do enemas to prevent these problems???

No.

4) I’ve never looked at myself down there. I’ve heard about porn actors “bleaching” it. Why does it need bleaching??? To kill bacteria maybe?

I wouldn’t worry about this… Chances are you SO has seen that area anyway after you have sex doggy style. All I do is shave. Even so, he’s not going to notice details.

5) How much does it hurt?

It can be uncomfortable. If you’re not turned on enough and if there isn’t enough lubricant, it can hurt initially getting in. This may sound gross, but at it’s worse (for me) it felt like a really uncomfortable reverse poop. Not fun. I have only done this a small handful of times, mainly to experiment and see if I would enjoy it. Also, my SO thinks it feels incredible.

6) Do you let him ummm, finish there? Can semen cause any medical problems in there??

Yes. He finishes really quickly because he says it feels so tight. I don’t think there’s anything you have to worry about medically, other than the fact that it will probably leak over the next day (which I do think is pretty gross, but to some it’s worth it).

7) How much and what kind of lubricant?

I’ve never used lube, which is probably why I’m not the biggest fan of it. We just use what has been produced naturally…

8) Do YOU actually enjoy it too?

No. I’ve tried to though. We rarely ever do this, and when he asks I always think that maybe this time it will feel good lol. I’ve read so many things about it feeling amazing. So I’ve always been down to try. And again, SO absolutely loves this (but thanksfully has only ever asked once or twice in the 2 years we’ve been together). 

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