(Closed) Do you like parenthood? Or is it a nightmare?

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
  • poll: My views on parenthood:

    I love it and I feel like it's my most important role

    I love it but it's not as great as I thought/hoped it would be

    It's okay. I don't particularly love it...

    It's been difficult and horrible but I will still do it again

    I completely regret becoming a parent and would choose not to be if I had the option again

    I am currently not a parent but would like to be someday

    I not a parent and do not ever plan on being one

  • Post # 17
    Member
    283 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    Being a parent with a helpful spouse is much better than when I was a single parent.

    My official vote was for the top option because #2 wasn’t quite accurate either. I had severe depression after baby 1 and worked with a therapist on unrealistic expectations, etc. I’m not a person who will make those Pinterest ideas for a class party or go to Gymboree activities. But, we read together, make things and go places together.

    My role as a mother to my own 3 children is more important than my role as a classroom teacher (my career). My oldest may feel different as she can’t stand how much of our family time I have to spend on things for work children. 

     

    Post # 18
    Member
    4435 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @Arshim:  I love being a parent! I’m a Stay-At-Home Mom and of course there are challenges, but I wouldn’t change a thing. Ours were both fully planned and we are doing well financially, so that makes a difference. if you didn’t ever want kids and had an unplanned pregnancy, I could see that being a very tough life adjustment to make.

    Post # 19
    Member
    3081 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Interesting thread. Commenting to follow. 

    Post # 20
    Member
    1470 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I chose the first option–love every minute, but it’s not exactly accurate. It is the closest to my personal feelings, though. I would say something more like:

    “I love being a parent. There are times that it is frustrating and hard, but it is always worth it to me.”

    I couldn’t choose the second one, because it’s actually better than I thought it’d be (truly amazing), but I don’t love every single second (especially not so much the ones in the middle of the night…)

    Post # 21
    Member
    1729 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I didn’t vote because none of the options really describe exactly how I feel.

    I love being a parent, wouldn’t trade my kids for anything, and feel that it is my most important role. It is greater than I ever could have imagined. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.

    It’s also harder than I could have ever imagined. My children are now 17 and 18 so I’ve been through most of the stages of childhood. I still remember the long, sleepless nights, the stress of finding safe, quality, affordable childcare, the medical scares (and my kids are pretty healthy!), the pinching pennies, the lack of freedom, the terrible twos, the teen years (oh my! I’m still there…). 

    One of the best pieces of advice I received that I’ve found to be so true throughout the years is “This too shall pass…” It helped me through the months where I worried my son would NEVER give up the bottle. It helped me through the years where my kids seemed to bicker with each other non-stop. It’s helping me now as my children transition into young adulthood.

    Being a parent isn’t for everyone but for me, it’s been worth every difficulty. 

     

    Post # 22
    Member
    7309 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    @Arshim:  This post may be helpful to you: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/is-having-children-all-its-cracked-up-to-be#axzz2mAFMnHun

    IMO, parenthood is exactly what each individual makes of it. If you set yourself up for success (helpful partner, stable income to cover the bills and still have a bit left over, safe roof over your head, etc.) and you have realistic expectations both of yourself, your child, and your situation, then you are more likely to have a positive experience.

    FWIW, I didn’t vote in the poll, as none of the options are a good fit. I love being DS’s Mom now that I have in place all of the things described in my previous paragraph. But when I was a single parent not even scraping by while dealing with a kid who didn’t sleep and was quite a challenge? Let’s just say I was at the end of my rope more moments than not. It is not an experience I would wish to repeat.

     

    Post # 23
    Member
    3771 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    I have 3 kids (11,5 and 11 months). I was 17 when I had my first. Parenting is hard. You have to give so much of yourself to this little person, but I think it is completely worth it. We had a really rough night in our house last night and one hug and belly laugh and all was forgotten:)

    Post # 24
    Member
    1309 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    View original reply
    @caritas:  This, 100%!

     

    Post # 25
    Member
    923 posts
    Busy bee

    I voted for the firstoption, because I love my daughter more than I could have ever imagined. that said, I don’t think being a parent is my most “important ” role necessarily. I think that it is really important to balance parenthood with other aspects of your life, and while my daughter is my first priority I think it is really important to be invested in the things I was invested before becoming a mother as well. being a mom is harder and a lot more fun than I ever thought it wuld be, and I would go through all of the hard times again ( I was a single mom at 23, so there were a lot of them!) in a heartbeat to get to have my daughter in my life, she is the coolest person I have ever met.  

    Post # 26
    Member
    339 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    Uhhmm.. I obviously love my kids to pieces. I wouldn’t wish them away for a second, I’m glad I have them. With that being said, parenting is really, really hard. It seems the older they get and the more they turn into these little people with opinions and personalities, the harder it gets. 

    I have dreams of a thriving career, living in a beautiful apartment in the city. But, for now I stay at home. Most days I am emotionally and mentally drained and bedtime can’t come soon enough. 

    Idk, I keep thinking I want another, but then I think to myself, I can barely handle the two I have. 

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