(Closed) Do you really need all that?

posted 8 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Ummm. If you didn’t want to cause waves, you might have decided against putting all of your offensive comments in BOLD. Just sayin’…

Post # 5
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’ll have you know, both my “egomaniacal sterling silver and pretentious crystal goblets” were GIVEN TO ME by either my grandmother or my fiance’s grandmother! These are family heirlooms that have survived DECADES. Isn’t that environmentally sound, to re-use items that have been passed down to you?

Post # 6
Member
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

Way to be judgmental. You can enjoy your day how you want, but I’m going to have my “superfluous shoes” and eat “toxic animal food” because I like them and steak is yummy.

 

Post # 7
Member
379 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

After reading this, all I could think was “this is a joke, right?”.

Post # 8
Member
393 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

thats great if thats what your into, but ultimately your gonna offend quite a few people. i have a pretty low key wedding, and your pretty offensive. you say you mean love and light, well don’t make posts like that. It’s not for you to judge other people with what they buy or how their wedding is.

Post # 9
Member
9 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Okay, I’m not done:

You sound like a pessimist. My coffee maker won’t keep me secure when my wedding is over and LIFE GOES BAD? Are you depressed? I’m asking seriously; do you think sadness is inevitable and that’s all there is?

Furthermore, it’s very touching that you’re not registered. But there are many brides and grooms out there who have very little, and cannot afford to buy even the basics for themselves. There is nothing wrong with registering for the essentials. And yes, plates to eat off of are essential.

Post # 10
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I see your point, but you could have worded it better….I think there definitely is a sentiment of entitlement, especially the expectation that guests should bring you a gift from your registry.  However, what people choose in their event is their choice and you don’t have to participate just as those who don’t like what you’re doing won’t participate.

Post # 12
Member
494 posts
Helper bee

I think that this is an issue that is “to each, their own” I am not registering at all. If people want to provide a gift we may decide to have a honeymoon registry but I do not expect anything from my wedding guests. I dont want my wedding to be a burden on anybody. It is a day to exchange vows with my bestfriend. I am having a small wedding because I dont feel that I need a bunch of strangers there just to prove something, but there are people with huge families that have to have a big wedding. As far as the “animal carcasses” go, not everybody is a vegetarian or vegan. I really think that this post will cause waves because you are insulting a whole, wide range of people. From the pretentious to the meat eaters. It is small minded to think your way is the right way. We are all different and we all choose our own path. Some people may not think 100 dollars is expensive for a pillow. It is all relative.

Post # 13
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I think your intentions are good but it’s hard to convince other’s of it when they don’t see your point of view.

EDIT: I think your best bet to change people is to be an example…people don’t enjoy being told how to live their life.

Post # 14
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Holy judgemental batman. 

If you weren’t trying to make waves you wouldn’t have passed judgement on the things that some of us value in our weddings.

It is evident how insecure in your own wedding you are by the way you over-dress it with an overuse of adjective and personification of inanimate objects. Ie: “flirtatious chopped walnuts – gag me”.

Don’t knock ours to make you feel better about you and your own wedding.

Post # 15
Member
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m a vegetarian. I have been one for nine years. I’m also very conscious of the mistreatment of many dairy animals and, as such limit my dairy to local, trusted farmers. I treat the animals in my life well and I do the same with people. I value my relationships above material things. 

But guess what? I still enjoy cooking homemade meals with my “ridiculously overpriced” KitchenAid Artisan that I bought off Craigslist. Why? Because I love to cook, and a hand mixer can’t really hold a candle to it when you get down to huge recipes and homemade whipping cream or buttercream. I also enjoy material things. Am I aware of where they come from? I try to be, and I learn more every day.

What’s more, I don’t judge others for their decisions. And guess what? Two of my friends have become vegetarians because they asked questions about my lifestyle. They loved my attitude of “every little bit counts” and it took that for them to realize that it was an achievable lifestyle. Do you honestly think they would have reacted that way at all if I had lectured them? Of course not, and what’s more, I wouldn’t do that because I respect that not everyone is the same. There are plenty of things that bother me about other people’s beliefs. But I hate when people insult mine, and if I expect them to respect me, then I’m sure as hell going to respect theirs. 

Post # 16
Member
29 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2011

You have really made me feel embarassed and ashamed. I don’t know if that was your intention, but that is how you’ve made me feel.

The ‘Lace plate’ post was mine. I got caught up in fine china, yes. Every single woman in my life who has been married always centers her registry around her china, and I plan on entertaining my very big extended family a lot. I was excited to receive something nice. I got distracted by the tiny details.

I’m having a 400 person wedding because my parents and my fiance’s parents are both paying for it and they say that because they’re giving the money, they should get to invite their friends and co-workers. It isn’t the intimate wedding I’d imagined as a little girl, but who am I to complain when the four of them are doing their best to make us happy? But we have many, many friends and family who do love us coming. And almost everyone we know thinks weddings are a big deal (it’s a cultural thing, both Greek and Italian) and if we don’t register, they’ll buy us gifts anyway, or give us more money than we need. I don’t know. That’s my excuse for my ‘registry fixation’, because my guest list is big, and my Fiance and I don’t have more than a few basics a piece.

You know, I really am worried now that my guests are thinking the same thing about me. If you read my other posts, I was concerned over how I’d look registering for silver and the like. But I thought that because those are traditional gifts, most people would understand. Guess I was wrong, huh?

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