(Closed) Do you show it when you dislike someone ?

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll:
  • Post # 16
    Member
    194 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I try and be polite but I definitely won’t engage with them.

    Post # 17
    Member
    1419 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2016

    barnes66:  I don’t have a lot of people who I dislike but there are 2 of them. One is at work and another in my social group. I fake smile and I am polite to a person at work out of professionalism but I avoid the one and I am rather cold to the other one.

    Post # 18
    Member
    1303 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: Hawksnest Cove Beach St John USVI

    With coworkers I hide things too well. In fact, some of the coworkers I dislike the most think I’m their greatest ally- may not be the best move, but I try and hide my true feelings. Outside of work I have no control over my facial expressions. I truly wish I did. 

    Post # 19
    Member
    6353 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

    I’m very polite with everyone, especially in the workplace.  I’ve had to work closely with people I don’t like and make a point of keeping it cordial and professional.  In my personal life, those that know me well can tell when I dislike someone, since I am way less talkative and relaxed around people I don’t like.

    Post # 20
    Member
    3560 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

    I’m polite to everyone, for the most part, regardless of how I feel about them. If it’s someone I work with, they will think I like them because that just makes work easier.

    Only in rare instances do I make it obvious that I dislike someone. There’s usually no benefit to that, so I avoid them as much as possible and smile and nod when I can’t.

    And yes it’s normal to start disliking someone after they offended you.

    Post # 21
    Member
    527 posts
    Busy bee

    If they are hitting on me and I can’t find any other subtle ways to get rid of them, yes. If not, no, I just try to be polite. 

    Post # 22
    Member
    526 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    barnes66:  I try not to show it, but I’ve found that if I don’t like someone the feeling is usually mutual.  It works the other way, too.  When I like someone he or she usually likes me, too.  I call it chemistry.

    Post # 22
    Member
    267 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    Nope. I have a severe case of resting nice face. I think most people I dislike would be shocked to find out! Tbh, I don’t dislike very many people, and it takes a lot to actually get me to that point. If I’m actively showing that I dislike you, it’s probably a bad sign. I tend to be pretty difficult to read in general, though. 

    Post # 23
    Member
    1433 posts
    Bumble bee

    I usually try not to show it, especially at work or around mutual friends.  But there are certain people who are so phoney and bitchy that I can’t hide my true feelings for them at times.  I just don’t want to talk to them or be around them or have to listen to them.  One girl who was supposed to be my friend was talking about me behind my back and when I found out and confronted her about it, she denied everything and pretended not to know what I was talking about just to save her own butt, but I already had the proof and wold have forgiven her if she had owned up to it and said she was sorry.  After that, I looked at her in a completely different way and now I don’t bother to go out of my way to say hi to her or be friendly to her at all. I think she knows I don’t like her.  LOL.

    Post # 24
    Member
    2347 posts
    Buzzing bee

    barnes66:  I don’t show it at all but it’s mostly because I’m a people pleaser and afraid of confrontation. It has actually become a problem for me on more than one occasion because it gets to the point where someone wants to be friends and hang out all the time and they don’t know that I’m not super fond of them. I wouldn’t say I really actively “dislike” people but being pretty introverted and solitary I’m just not all that interested in being friends with most people. Sometimes I wish I could be more direct.  

    Post # 25
    Member
    103 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2017

    I tend to go all Scarlett O’Hara and show my distaste for others. Oop. 

    Post # 26
    Member
    183 posts
    Blushing bee

    I’m polite in the most minimal way possible and have a decent poker face. I realized by comparison that my Fiance totally does not have a good poker face and it annoys me somewhat. But I wonder if my eyes give it away sometimes. 

    I’m planning on learning to deal with confrontation better. I have a book that I need to start practicing from. I’m 31 now dammit. 

    Recent story: There is a girl and a guy I know that act very aloof and introverted, but particularly the girl rarely initiates conversation with me, is not reciprocal with compliments, does not smile easily, and sometimes doesn’t even say hello when I walk past in her vicinity a couple times a week, even so far as to be walking behind me and she never says anything even though she knows I’m aware of her presence. I think it’s just part of their personality and for months I would compulsively say hello even though I started to dislike her. I’m sorry but damn throw a person a bone. I used to have panic attacks and was moody when I was younger but I was still a friendly person. In contrast to this intern here was also a very quiet and super shy girl, but she opened up and smiled at me whenever we talked. 

    Anyway I gave up on this girl and her boyfriend and it feels SOOO good to walk past her without even acknowledging her now.  It’s immature but I convinced myself I’m saving her from my apparent annoying-ness and cornering her with conversation (assumption on my part obvs.) I avoid her now unless close proximity is necessary but even then I smile but don’t say hi. Fuck that let her say hello for once! 

     

     

     

    Post # 27
    Member
    244 posts
    Helper bee

    barnes66:  I don’t show it when I don’t like someone, but then again, there aren’t many people I dislike because it’s not worth my energy or happiness to dislike them lol

    Post # 28
    Member
    507 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I Try not to be mean… But am usually quite around ppl I don’t want to be around, so it could be obvious. & I usually can tell if someone doesn’t really like me… Haha I always have those vibes & I end up finding out too from people that know! 

    Post # 29
    Member
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee

    No. It’s never a good idea to show your hand, no matter how tempting. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer. 

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