posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@1stRosie:  Wow, how interesting! I can definitely see how that would help!

My SO and I never really get into any super heating arguments  – we used to though! We I had a tendency to get really, really worked up emotionally which never led us anywhere good. I found taking a time out, stepping outside on the patio to grab some fresh air, stepping into another room..a brief cool down period really helped us.  We would never actually leave the house or ever go to bed angry with each other though.

But I do find if you can find a way to calm down (spooning method would definitely help with that!) then I think that’s the most important.

Once we  I was able to calm down and take some of my crazy away, it was only at that point we would actually get somewhere productive in the argument. What I have to focus on the most is not cutting my SO off mid sentences while he is trying to discuss something with me.

I think what’s most improtant for us is that we both walk away from any discussion knowing we’ve both been heard.

Might try that spooning method out!! It sounds actually really fun and productive! Plus, I really like how SPOON TUNE sounds! ๐Ÿ˜‰ What a great idea!

Post # 4
903 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

If I have something difficult/awkward/emotional to talk with Fiance about, I try to do it in bed.  Not naked or anything, just laying on our bed facing each other.  For some reason, it brings a sort of intimate connection to the conversation and both of us are more comfortable saying what we really think in a more eloquent way.  We don’t get carried away or raise our voices when we do this.

Post # 6
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I really really like this.  Going to bring it up with Darling Husband tonight. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 7
708 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2004

Thanks for sharing. This is such a great idea. 

Post # 8
920 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

I’ve always tried to keep arguments out of the bed, as I don’t want it to be a negative or stressful place. But I like this idea and think it would be good to try out 

Post # 9
232 posts
Helper bee

I guess we do something like that already. Our worst arguments usually end with one of us yelling “CAN’T WE JUST F***ING CUDDLE?!” We don’t always actually go and cuddle, sometimes, but it definitely helps to get rid of the negativity in the room.

And like a previous poster said, I also think of bed as a safe place to talk about things that have the potential to turn into big arguments. I think we make the effort to be quieter and calm and both of us want to be able to go to bed with the air clear and just snuggle.  ๐Ÿ™‚

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