Post # 1
When NTNT (Not Trying Not To) does Darling Husband still “pull the goalie” (ejaculate inside of you to be blunt)? It seems Darling Husband and I are in a weird stage where we’d ideally prefer to wait simply because I’m looking for my first job out of law school. However, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Sometimes we use condoms, sometimes we don’t, but Darling Husband NEVER pulls the goalie. For those of you NTNT, does Darling Husband pull the goalie? Do you have to pull the goalie to be in the NTNT category in your opinon?
ETA: I’m assuming if you’re NTNT then you’re not on any form of birth control, and don’t use any type of contraceptives?
Post # 3
He doesn’t but I am on the pill.
Post # 4
I consider “pulling out” to be Trying Not To. So based on that, I’d think most couples NTNT wouldn’t bother pulling out. We personally didn’t have much of a NTNT stage.
Post # 5
I don’t get it. In my mind, if a SO is not pulling out- then you are TTC, but maybe that is just me!
Post # 6
@cbee: because you are not actively trying to figure out when in your cycle you’re fertile.. you’re just having sex and whatever happens happens… or at least that’s how I always viewed NTNT.
Post # 7
I think “pulling the goalie” means removing your form of birth control. Like going without condoms or in, the most literal sense, having your IUD out. I guess NTNT means “whatever happens, happens” and you’re not actively preventing pregnancy. While withdrawal isn’t real effective in the long term, if you “pull out” that is an attempt to prevent pregnancy.
Post # 8
If you’re pulling out, you’re still trying to avoid conception…just not trying very hard.
In my mind:
TTC = making an effort to get pregnant
NTNT = what happens, happens…no trying to time things, no method to avoid
preventing/trying to avoid = pull out, condoms, the pill, or other method.
Post # 9
At first, he did, and as we got closer to the time we had decided to TTC, he stopped.
Post # 10
To my mind, if you are pulling out you are trying not to, to me its a form of birth control, albiet not the best one.. I used it for years with my Darling Husband and we never got pregnant.
Post # 11
I consider pulling out to be TTA (Trying To Avoid), albeit not the most reliable method of preventing pregnancy.
And I’m with cbee. I don’t really get the concept of NTNT. To me, if you are having unprotected sex (without pulling out) and you are not practicing natural family planning techniques where you monitor your cycles and avoid fertile times, then you are TTC.
Some people get more strategic about the whole process than others, but to me, TTC does not necessarily mean charting, temps, scheduled sex, OPKs, etc.
Post # 13
NTNT means he does not pull out.
The difference between NTNT and TTC is that TTC is more actively trying, whereas NTNT is not preventing, but not actively trying.
Post # 14
I’ve always heard “pulling the goalie” refer to stopping the use of birth control, not pulling out.
To me, NTNT means that aren’t using any form of birth control but you also aren’t actively charting, tracking your ovuation / fertile windows, etc. You’re just having unprotected sex.
Post # 15
Ah! I’ve heard the abbrievation apply to both! So confusing sometimes haha.
Post # 16
I would say NTNT means he doesn’t pull out and you are just letting it happen without actively charting or trying to get pregnant.
I stopped taking the pill when we got married and used the pull out method as our only form of BC. 2 months after our first anniversary I was pregnant. we were not trying but clearly not preventing very well either lol.