Do you think most women would want a boy or a girl in my shoes?

posted 7 months ago in Babies
  • poll: Boy or girl?
    Girl : (9 votes)
    39 %
    Boy : (14 votes)
    61 %
  • Post # 31
    Member
    1749 posts
    Bumble bee

    This post rubs me the wrong way. People are having babies for so many wrong reasons. Your baby isn’t an object or trophy. You should be ashamed if you think that way at all. 

    Post # 32
    Member
    2558 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    This post is disturbing. 

    Post # 33
    Member
    5452 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2015

    LilliV :  My daughter is only 9 months old and already loves cars!  Of course, I didn’t find this out until after I bought her Christmas gifts, but all of her gifts are practical development toys, not gender specific lol.  At least we can keep an eye on it and give cars as a suggestion for her birthday if she’s still into them!

    Post # 34
    Member
    9771 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Sansa85 :  no, the phrase is odd but I think if you really want one particular sex and plan on having 2 or more kids then getting what you want first takes the pressure off any other kids so you know you won’t have any disappointment.  If you only want 2 kids and really want a girl and have a boy first then you might feel a lot of presssure when you get pregnant with #2.

    I wanted one of each and I got lucky and got that. I do overbuy on cute baby boy clothes but regular boy clothes don’t excite me much and I still love dressing my 4.5 year old up while I can!! lol. They also make lots of cute girl clothes with dinos and cars and spaceships on them.  Sequined car skirt?  You bet!   And I make sure to find cats for my boy where I can. Not the reason I wanted a girl at all but it was an unexpected perk I enjoy (until she gets old enough to refuse).

    Post # 35
    Member
    9105 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    Your family’s whack if they actually care this much about the sex of your child. I really wanted a boy, and I would’ve still wanted a boy even if there were 391 grandsons already and every single family was whining about wanting to shop in the baby girl section. Not their baby.

    Post # 36
    Member
    302 posts
    Helper bee

    I really dislike this post.
    My sister was severely disabled at birth and my boyfriend’s brother was severely disabled at birth.
    Having a healthy baby is all that matters.
    Both of our mothers would be pained to read this post.

    Post # 38
    Member
    9573 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: City, State

    I think some of this can also come down to how easily you are able to conceive as well. I think unfortunately, a lot of women who have dealt with infertility or difficulty getting pregnant (as a lot of this board have) don’t have the luxury of favoring having a boy over a girl or vice versa. For women who have been trying for months and years to get pregnant I really think most just hope to be able to bring home a baby one day so the gender preference becomes much less important than not having another negative pregnancy test or losing another unborn child. 

    Post # 39
    Member
    774 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2016

    My last comment was a joke. I feel a lot of tension in this thread. I…would probably childishly want to “win” the game and get a boy. However, I would feel very conflicted and wrong about that, maybe to the extent that I would want to blend in and have a girl because it’s just so wrong to cherish the first boy like that and I’d probably worry it’d send the wrong message to all the granddaughters and to my son that he was special (and potentially entitled) just for being male. As tempting as it is, it’s also a double edged sword there to have that laser focus and probably increased expectations for this potential boy. 

    I have a son. One grandparent really wanted a granddaughter, one really wanted a grandson, and the other two didn’t care. I kind of bristle each time my son gets those compliments just for being a dude from the grandparent who wanted a grandson. 

    Post # 40
    Member
    1111 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    When I first got pregnant, I really wanted a boy. I don’t even know why! Then I lost that baby, and found out she would have been a girl. Now I long for a little girl more than anything.

    Post # 41
    Member
    828 posts
    Busy bee

    All babies are precious gifts. People who value one sex over another really irritate me.  Do you know why we’re STILL dealing with inequality shit? Because people like you and your family put boys on pedastals. Hasn’t even been born yet, hasn’t even done a single thing or spoken a single word  and already you’re treating a boy like a prize and a girl like a disappointment. 

     

    I wanted a healthy baby, didn’t care the sex one bit. Maybe it’s because I’m older and more mature, but at my 18-week anatomy scan, I was literally praying that all my baby’s anatomy was there….not praying for a penis or vagina but praying that the heart would have 4 chambers, that there would be a fully formed brain and skull, that there would be 4 limbs and 2 kidneys and a liver.  I asked about the baby’s heart and brain before I even asked if it was a boy or girl. Finding out the sex was just a fun surprise! 

    Post # 42
    Member
    2914 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    I’ve never heard of a family being so creepily obsessed about what sex the baby is going to be. 

    Post # 43
    Member
    2558 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    I kind of want a girl to get “my girl” out of the way.

    OP, you realize you might never have a girl right? Or a boy? You might have 5 kids all boys or all girls. you’re not guaranteed to have both. 

    Post # 44
    Member
    6402 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

    I don’t care to guess what others would want, in my case, both times I just wanted a healthy baby.

    My son was the first grandson on my side and my daughter the first granddaughter on my husbands side.  Nothing like what you described happened, which is good, since I have no patience for that level of stupidity.

    Post # 45
    Member
    536 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    This post is so weird.

    You know that no matter how much attention the first grandson gets at first, that will fade, right? The initial excitement families express about babies doesn’t translate to your worth as a mother or to your experience with motherhood. Grandma and grandpa won’t be helping change him in the middle of the night or rock him back to sleep because he’s the first grandson. It won’t matter if he’s the first grandson or the twelfth granddaughter when you have mastitis for the third time and desperately need a shower and haven’t slept more than four hours in weeks.

    Truly, at like 8 weeks, you will not give a shit that everyone was excited or disappointed at the gender reveal. They won’t appreciate or help you any more or less in the long run, so whatever moment in the spotlight you have or don’t have will be fleeting and meaningless in no time. They might go overboard buying stuff for your shower, but when it comes to the day-in and day-out of parenting, it’s all you and your partner, and having a boy or girl won’t make it any more glamorous or manageable or enjoyable or special.

    It’s one thing for the parents to have a gender preference, but it’s really weird for the family to inflict a preference, and it’s even weirder that you’re asking us to additionally weigh in on what your preference should be. Weird weird weird.

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