- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
Ok. I have been in 2 weddings previous to the this one and neither time did I even spend in the same ballpark as what we are looking at spending for this bride, and the more the tab grows the more I think I just can’t afford it.
First of all, when she asked me she stated “I am going to try to keep the costs down as much as possible for you guys. We will find the cheapest dresses and cut costs where possible.” She has 2 bridesmaids who just recently got married, and I can’t speak for the other one but me and my new husband are saving to move we just bought a new car and now the car I have been driving is dying.
Also, he is in the wedding as a groomsman so we still have his tux rental to deal with!
Anyway here is the cost so far:
Bridal Shower – We are splitting the cost of everything, catering, decorations, the whole she-bang. The bride picked the place to have it (is that the way it’s supposed to work?) So between food, cake, decorations, gifts I am looking at about $200 – $250 for that.
Bachellorette Party – Bride dictated that we will go to Pittsburgh (We live outside the city and she wants to go into the city for this) So we all have to plop down $700-$780 for the limo. (We are all assuming that any of her other “guests” are not expected to chip in for transportation. If they want thats nice, but we don’t think we can outright ask them) Drinks, and dinner.. so there goes another $300-$350
The dress was $260. She wants us all in the same shoes. $40. She wants us all to have the same hair, jewlery, etc.
Hubby’s Tux rental will be about what $200??
The thing is that I am not very close with her, and right now we just have so many other things going on. I would like to politley tell her I can’t afford it, but my Hubby can still be a groomsman since he is very close with the groom. I only accepted on the fact she PROMISED to keep costs down knowing our situation. I thought that the Bridesmaids got together and planned this for the bride on our budget, not having her dictate the things she wants at her shower/Bach party. I suggested to the girls that maybe we could just stay local for her Bach party, but no Bride is insisting we go to the city.
Heck, they didn’t even attend our wedding (We got married in Las Vegas) because they didn’t have the funds to travel and we completely understood.
Maybe this is about normal costs, but the weddings I have been in before I never spent more than $50 on the Shower and only bought drinks for the Bride on her Bach party. Dresses for both of those weddings were under $200 also.
I just don’t know what to do, I already put the deposit down on the dress because we had to order back in Feb, and this was way way before any of the costs for these parties had come up. The wedding is in Sept.