Post # 1
To save both time and money for our close friends, we told our bridal party that they don’t need to plan any bridal showers or bachelor parties for us because none of us live in the same state, and also because most of us are just starting out in our careers so none of us are really well off.
As a gesture of gratitude, we are buying dresses for all the bridesmaids ($150 each) and also buying the suits & ties for all the groomsmen ($150 to $200 each). Since everything is custom made to fit each person’s size, they will get to keep everything after the wedding for future use.
So with this in mind… since the bridal party doesn’t need to do anything for the wedding besides showing up the day of, and doesn’t need to spend any money besides personal travel expenses (like any other wedding guests), do you think we still need to get bridesmaids and groomsmens gifts?
My fiance feels that the custom dresses & suits/ties are already a really nice thank-you present, and we don’t really need to add to it.
What do you guys think??
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor
Welcome to the bee!!
I don’t think it’s necessary. But I do think it would be sweet of you to write a really nice hand-written card to the bridesmaids – for me a card goes a really long way and is often more special than a gift. I dunno if your Fiance will write cards to the Groomsmen – right now my Fiance is resisting writing cards for his guys, it’s not a “manly” thing to do.
Post # 4
I would say no – they aren’t having to fork out any more than they would as a regular guest. They do still deserve a good thank you though and it would be a nice gesture to throw the rehearsal dinner of course.
Post # 5
- Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World
@Miss Wallaby: I agree with this…cards add a nice sentiment the day of the wedding. You are really awesome to buy the entire wedding party’s attire! :0)
Post # 6
Thank you for the quick replies!
I think I will do just that then 😀 We’re still going to do a casual rehersal dinner and will definitely thankt the Bridesmaid or Best Man & Groomsmen then too.
Just wanted to make sure not getting them a traditional BM/GM gift wouldn’t be considered rude.
Post # 7
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
Where have all the people gone that say “if it’s used in the course of the wedding day, it’s not a gift” ??? Because that’s what camp I’m in – sure they CAN use those outfits after the wedding day — but will they? You can get them a more simple gift, but I still think they deserve a gift. They’re sacrificing a day to be with you (yes, like your other wedding guests, but they’re in a position of honor standing up with you).
Post # 8
No, I think the outfit/not having to pay any money for the wedding is gift enough! Agree that a simple card is a nice gesture, or if you want to include $5 gift cards to a coffee place the day of.
Post # 9
I agree with PPs – you are being really generous by providing their day-of attire! A nice handwritten card would be a good gesture.
If you really wanted to get them something small – maybe like earrings and cufflinks?
Post # 10
I think that you should give gifts out of a desire to give them a gift, not because of an obligation. As a Bridesmaid or Best Man, I would be appreciative enough of the fact that you’re paying for my dress and would rather not receive a dainty necklace that I’ll never wear or a Coach wristlet that’s not my style.
If you want to give them a gift or a card to thank them for being in your wedding party, go for it, but if you feel that the attire is enough a gift than you can justify it.
Post # 11
I would still get them a little something to say thank you for standing up with you on your big day. It’s awesome that you are paying for the Bridal Party attire, but it’s not really a gift to them since it’s for your wedding. You don’t have to get them anything extravagent. Maybe just a nice bottle of wine or their favorite liquor.
Post # 12
I think a thoughtful, handwritten thank-you card could suffice here. You’re already being generous to them and making sure that being in your wedding isn’t a financial burden.
Post # 13
I would say no! Maybe have them over for a movie and an ice cream party one day or something and get them a card.
Post # 14
I think the outfits are more than enough, but as others have already said, a nice handwritten thank-you note can never go wrong.
Post # 15
I think a handwritten thank you is sufficient, but personally I would throw in some chocolate or a small bottle of liquor or a semi-inexpensive bottle of wine or something. I would try to keep it to like $10-15 a person. Just a little something.
Post # 16
Just a card would be fine.