Post # 1
Throughout the planning of my wedding I encountered times when my emotions and stress came out of nowhere, and finding this site was very helpful to me. Now that the entire process is done, and I can look back, I see the value in having someone to talk to specifically about wedding planning stressors. (Such as bridesmaid/MIL/FI/Family/guest drama, dress regret, anxieties and other emotions, and pretty much all the special craziness a bride or groom goes through when planning their wedding. This wasn’t stuff I wanted to dump all over my friends, family or FI, so I came to the bee for help.
I’m taking my Master’s degree in counseling right now and am wondering if there is a need for specific wedding planning counseling. So my question to you all is would you find a service like this useful? Could you see yourself using it? I’m not talking about marriage counselling, unless that was needed, but specifically having someone knowledgable about the various stresses and problems that occur during wedding planning.
Thank you for your input!
Post # 2
Pre-marital counseling, yes. However, I feel like I ever got to the point where I needed counseling simply due to wedding planning then I would need to step back and get my priorities in order. It also kind of sounds like part of a wedding director’s job, so I would go that route if I ever got too overwhelmed.
Post # 3
Dovetail: I sort of feel like if you need counseling to get through wedding planning, you might want to reconsider marriage.
Wedding planning is nothing more than a lot of decisions–when you really get down to the nitty-gritty. Even if they are elaborate, they are nothing more than party planning decisions.
Sure, you have to try and appease family and inlaws….but you have to do that even when you’re not planning a wedding (aka a big party!)
I also don’t know how someone else could “counsel” me through wedding planning. It’s making decisions and sticking to a budget. Unless a Wedding Planning Counselor is going to take over and be my magic wedding planner who can make everything I want to happen- happen—- I have no idea how on Earth they would be of any help.
Post # 4
Why wouldn’t someone just hire a wedding coordinator? That manages the stress and gets actual tasks completed at the same time.
After logistics are taken care of, any remaining issues (family arguments, indecision, anxiety) are things you could talk out in regular therapy sessions, similiar to the other general things that people talk about: school, work, relationships, self worth, etc.
Post # 5
FI and I are very agreeable, so we haven’t had any wedding planning spats. Wedding planning is already such a busy and costly time; I wonder how many people would electively seek out a specific wedding planning counselor. If there was a problem, premarital counseling would probably be a good place to discuss it as early problems can be learning experiences too. If you were a general counselor, you could list wedding planning or premarital counseling as areas of interest I suppose.
Post # 6
I don’t think it’s a bad idea, but I also think that there are three “substitutes” for the service:
1. Regular therapist, with whom you’re already talking about stressors, etc.
2. Friends/family, who have to sit through your rant sessions 🙂
3. Online forums, where we can say everything anonymously
I personally don’t think I would seek out a wedding-specific counselor (I’d talk to my normal therapist), but perhaps as an add-on to marriage counseling?
Post # 7
Dovetail: I would say that there are plenty of brides who could use a therapist but most of the time it is because of issues that are brought forward or made worse by wedding planning or those other special creatures who are already entitled brats made worse by the thought that they should be even more the centre of everyones universe due to getting married. All of these issues are not wedding related so they do not need a wedding planning counsellor they just need a therapist in general.
Post # 8
No, I and don’t even feel empathy towards women who think that their overblown pretty princess party is so necessary that they deliberately chose to be fatigued and pressured in unfamiliar ways. Oy vey, their stress causes them to consult therapists! That’s just silly and is even beyond first world problems. It reminds me of Victorian heroines in novels who get the vapors because they are such weak, delicate creatures and life is just too hard.
Here’s a thought ladies, if the party planning isn’t fun, don’t plan the party. It’s pretty simple.
Certainly as PP’s have pointed out, putting on a Big Giant Wedding Event may stress family and friend relationships, and learning coping mechanisms would be useful. But that’s family and relationship counseling, not wedding planning counseling.
Post # 9
Thanks for your responses bees! I agree that perhaps wedding planning stress is easily rolled into other life problems and could be dealt with by a general family therapist.
Post # 10
Dovetail: Hiring a wedding planner would be a lot more useful than a wedding planning counselor.
Post # 11
wedding planning for me was a stress-free and drama-free process.
Post # 12
This is an interesting idea! I honestly felt like venting to a friend who wasn’t part of the wedding at all was the most therapeutic for me. My husband, bridesmaids and family were always there for me to rant to but it’s hard to really let it out when they’re involved. I wasn’t aware of weddingbee when I was weddng planning but knowing there are forums, I feel is helpful in itself. I’m not sure if wedding planning counseling is necessary or realistic since it would be just another thing to budget for.