(Closed) Do you think your birth order affects your relationship?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: Birth Orders for you and your significant other
    We're both only children : (7 votes)
    3 %
    Both oldest children : (58 votes)
    25 %
    Both middle children : (6 votes)
    3 %
    Both youngest children : (32 votes)
    14 %
    One oldest child, one youngest child : (53 votes)
    23 %
    One oldest child, one middle child : (21 votes)
    9 %
    One middle child, one youngest child : (18 votes)
    8 %
    One oldest child, one only child : (18 votes)
    8 %
    One middle child, one only child : (7 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    7902 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

    My pastor talked with us about this at our premarital counseling. My husband is the oldest, and I’m in the middle, but since my older brother is 5 years older than me, I could as an oldest child too, apparently. I think it’s good to understand your spouses childhood experience, which birth order is a part of, so that you can understand expectations, how he/she responds to pressure, etc.

    I definitely have a strong need to be right, but if I never pretend to know something I don’t.

    Post # 4
    1512 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’ve never even considered this. I wouldn’t think it would effect the relationship, but I have no idea. My Fiance is the oldest of two, and I’m an only.

    I think his parent’s favoritism might have effected him. They DEFINTELY favor his sister more. They give her everything and value/trust her choices, where they criicize/question everything he does.

    Post # 5
    22 posts

    @MrsEdamame:  oh yes, my bf and i are both oldest children and both want to be right. I think he’s a little more intense about it than I am, but it definitely contributes to many arguments. I think the birth order also contributes in positive ways, in terms of both of us being ambitious and goal-oriented. Of course, at the moment, my goal seems to be getting that ring, which he’s rebelling against….lol

    Post # 7
    1963 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    I was just thinking about this the other day!  I’m the oldest, SO is a middle child.  He’s much more of a compromiser, while I like to make decisions.  I’m also more high strung and he’s more laid back.  I’m working hard on not steamrolling him.

    Post # 8
    2893 posts
    Sugar bee

    Absolutely. We’re both the oldest and our personalities are very similar because of it. Ironically, our siblings fall into their respective child-order-stereotypes as well. 

    Post # 9
    1297 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think it does. Fiance is an oldest, I am a middle. He is more set in his ways, while I’m more compromising.

    Post # 11
    9483 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’m the oldest of my four brothers and Fiance is the only child.  I don’t think this affects us.

    Post # 13
    6892 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Oh yes.

    We are both the oldest and both come from divorced families…so we both took on that role of “mini-mom” or “mini-dad” when our parents were going through it taking care of our younger siblings.

    We also both have a problem being wrong, aren’t amazing at compromise, and often attempt to aid our siblings even when we need to butt out. The great thing is that, for example, if Darling Husband is trying to “over help” his brother I can objectively say, “Hey, he’s a big boy, let him do it.” So we can play the voice of reason and we know the other understands us.

    Post # 14
    4887 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    My option’s not up there.  I’m an only, he’s the younger brother to an older sister.

    He LOVES to call me ‘spoiled’… like, loves.  It drives me crazy.  We also have some big differences in the way we grew up and in our current family situations.  It’s caused some misunderstandings but we get through it.

    Post # 15
    3773 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    I dont think so because I don’t really buy into the birth order thing. I think there are so many things that can happen in life that changes who you are as a person that birth order is a moot point.

    Post # 16
    515 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I’m the youngest, Fiance is the oldest …. kinda a weird observation. He is my brothers age(28..almost29) and I am his sisters age(24). My brother and his wife are both the oldest siblings.

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