(Closed) Does a sister have to be MOH?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
91 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Do you have somone who hands down you feel should be standing next to you and putting up with everything a Maid/Matron of Honor does, or are you undecided with that? I think that if you don’t have someone who you feel deserves the title more than anything and should be then either have your sister or not have titles and have everyone equal. My cousin did the same thing everyone was equal. Is your Fiance going to have a bestman? If he has one you may have to have a Maid/Matron of Honor cause if not who is going to be paird with the Bestman? That person might assume thats the role they have. Sooo many different things to think about. Good Luck lady

Post # 4
Member
2453 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Out of curiousity, have you thought of having two MOHs- your best friend and your sister?

I’m also of the mind-set that “family is first” normally, so I’ll probably have my sister as the “real” Maid/Matron of Honor, but my best friend- sister without the genetics- is my second Maid/Matron of Honor, so to speak.

Post # 5
Member
9050 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I don’t think you HAVE to, but I think if you don’t have a reason why she SHOULDN’T be maid of honour or there’s no other clear cut “winner” out of the group, “she’s my sister” is an easy tie breaker.

I had my sister as Maid/Matron of Honor, two best friends and my SIL.  One of my best friends is sometimes a little sensitive and overly interested in establishing who’s my BEST best friend between them (like when we got engaged asked if I called the other one first, and even though she was a bridesmaid, standing second to the Maid/Matron of Honor, closer to me in the ceremony was a big deal to her – a little annoying sure, but other friend and I know she’s just a little insecure sometimes, and we love her anyway).  So right there, the easiest thing to do, even though my sister lived in Australia at the time was to pull the blood relations card.

Post # 7
Member
4998 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yes, have her do it. My sister is 18 and has done zero planning but that’s not really what it’s about. I have other bridesmaids and my mom and myself for planning so as long as she’s emotionally supportive that’s enough for me. It was really important to her and it has already brought us closer. I think as long as you have your expectations right, it should be a great experience. When I asked the girls, I told my BFF I was having my sister as my Maid/Matron of Honor but she is my best friend and I hoped she would be willing to help my sister if necessary (just answering questions and stuff, not planning a shower or anything)

Post # 8
Member
4998 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Or better yet, have two MOH’s…

Post # 9
Member
2440 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Have two MOHs

Post # 10
Member
410 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I agree with everyone who says have 2 MOHs. I couldn’t stand the thought of having to choose between my sister and my best friend, so I picked both  🙂

Post # 11
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

For those of you with 2 Maid/Matron of Honor, how did they split the traditional Maid/Matron of Honor duties (walking in before you, holding bouquet, toast, etc)?

Post # 12
Hostess
7547 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

Your sister doesn’t HAVE to be your Maid/Matron of Honor but if there’s no big reason why not I would have her. And by big reason I mean there’s something seriously wrong with your relationship, not that she may feel stressed when she’s planning. I would have two MOHs in your situation. 

I had two (sister and SIL) and there were no problems. They planned the bachelorette party together. They both helped me with a few planning tasts. Sister stood closer to me at the ceremony, followed by SIL. 

Post # 14
Member
4953 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

If you have a lot of really good friends, choosing your sister is an easy cop-out because no one can get angry at that. 

But she doesn’t have to be, especially if you have a clear-cut “best friend”. 

Post # 16
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m on the same situation as well! My sister is getting married before me and she ismaking me Maid/Matron of Honor and I decided on making my bestfriend my Maid/Matron of Honor only because my sister and I are so different. We love each other but we share different interest and she is shy and I don’t know is she would be a good Maid/Matron of Honor. I didn’t knew 2 Maid/Matron of Honor was acceptable…How does that work? Maybe I’ll change my mind and have 2 instead of 1!

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