Post # 1
Contacting venues to get cost estimates without really being engaged??
Boyfriend or Best Friend and I were talking about vague wedding plans and trying to set some savings/financial goals for this year (assuming we’ll probably get married next year) and he asked what I was thinking in terms of a wedding budget, and I said we should operate under the assumption that we’re paying for it all ourselves and I’d like to not spend more than $10-$15K, but I don’t know if that’s realistic or not – I’d have to get some cost info. I’ve contacted about 10 places just to get a price range, but it feels really weird!
Post # 3
I would initially say yes it is, but after seeing my SIL shop around for wedding gowns and buying her Tiara when she is not engaged, Ide say go for it! Keep it secret though. It can be your hidden hobby until he pops the question! : ) We spent 25,000 on our wedding and my parents paid for 10,000. We had 160 people come. So if you keep it small and simple you probably can do it in that price range, but its gonna be hard!
Post # 4
I did it before my husband and I were officially engaged. We had decided we were getting married, and even had a venue in mind. All we were waiting for was the ring, and I contacted the venue to see what their packages cost. I’m glad I did because that left us plenty of time to set a reasonable and realistic budget based on actual information.
I say as long as you’re doing it to scout out the cost of certain venues, what’s the harm? If you’re looking to see what dates are available, that would be pushing it for me, but also not the worst thing in the world 🙂
Post # 5
I haven’t contacted anywhere, but I have looked at a few places that show their costs online just for fun. I think I would feel weird about contacting places without the full proposal and idea of when the wedding will take place since some of that information will determine the cost.
In terms of setting a budget, I truly believe that you set the budget that you want to spend and find a way to make it work. I wouldn’t build my budget around how much things cost in my area, so it’s a moot point for me, but if it helps you plan and get orgaized then I don’t think you should feel weird about it at all.
Post # 6
We were in the same boat and I let my mom in on the secret because I knew we would be depending on a lot of her contacts to get good deals. That led to us finding out the venue would be free, so we reserved it even before we were officially engaged! Now that felt weird!
Post # 7
Well, you can e-mail and just request their price list. That’s what I’ve done. I do have a date though, so it makes things easier. I don’t feel weird because I’m not actually talking to anyone. Just e-mail communication and no one has asked for more detail. I give them the date and my e-mail address and they reply with the price list.
Post # 8
@amac – that’s amazing!! free is the best kind and that totally makes sense that you would do that 🙂 but hey, i know of plenty other ladies in the hive who have done the same for whatever reason, or at least picked the venue and jumped on it immediately after they got engaged. my mom knows nothing except that i told her (possibly even before I met my Boyfriend or Best Friend or at least before we were serious) the place where i want to have my wedding. which, consequently, my Boyfriend or Best Friend also suggested getting married there too, completely unprompted! i have a friend who i want to design our invites but i’m DEF waiting till we are actually engaged to get him on board.
i have definitely not asked about dates – that would be too much for me! it’s still soooo open right now anway. i’m just really trying to get an idea of what costs are like for places near us that offer practically full packages vs. having to put together and pay for all the elements yourself. i am trying to pin a number on a budget so early because i have ZERO savings right now (well not quite zero but close to it!) and Boyfriend or Best Friend has some (part of which will of course go toward my ring :)), so i’m trying to figure out how much money we should aim to save this year. it’s so much fun though!
Post # 9
nope. i just emailed and asked for information. only one person followed up to see how things the planning was going so if you want to get quotes, i say go for it. it’s all in the spirit of research!
Post # 10
I emailed around and was able to get price estimates without actually having to show them a naked ring finger! But, otherwise, i’d probably just say i was engaged and the ring was getting fixed or cleaned or prongs checked or something to explain its absence
Post # 11
We went together before we were technically engaged, but we’re super planny-people so we like to get the lay of the land before jumping in! :o) I say visit away!
Post # 12
I say why not? I do it all the time. it’s good to see what the prices are going for these days and see which ones can fit in your budget.