(Closed) Does anyone keep the gender of the baby a surprise anymore?

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 46
1019 posts
Bumble bee

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lovemygsp:  Yes, I said that the younger parents (in my circle, anyway) seem to find out more. And I can certainly see why my unpopular opinion could seem blunt. But no, I didn’t intend for it to come off as if I’m on my high horse. I was stating an observation on what other people do – it may not be my choice, but the great thing about life is that other people are free to make decisions as they see fit.<br /><br />Actually, I half take back that statement; it’s not just the younger moms with (probably) unplanned pregnancies who are finding out in my area. Pretty much everyone does, including the thirty-something moms I know. ๐Ÿ˜›

Post # 47
446 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m 24 weeks and have known the sex of the baby for almost 8 weeks.  However only my husband and I know.  We aren’t telling anyone until after the birth.  I know this is an uncommon choice but it just feels right for us.  It feels very…private for some reason.  I have always felt a little uncomfortable knowing the sex of babies that aren’t born yet, like it’s not my place to know.  I am really really looking forward to announcing the sex after the birth, especially to my mom. She would love to know now but understands our choice and Mother-In-Law doesn’t want to know AT ALL. We are really not into pink and blue items either and I will be happy to get gender neutral items as gifts.

I guess I’m a private person but to me it’s not a given that if the parents know the sex then everyone else, grandparents, coworkers, facebook friends and the lady in the supermaket who asks gets to know as well. 

  • This reply was modified 6 years, 8 months ago by  .
Post # 48
65 posts
Worker bee

I plan on not finding out ๐Ÿ™‚ instead having the gender slipped into an envelop and given to my mother along with money to buy the supplys and giving to us after birth. People that find out tend to name the baby before birth and i really want to look and my children before naming them ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 49
2466 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

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Daizy914:  I think when it happens I wouldnt be able to last lol… I was the “go and hunt for the christmas presents” kinda kid …although I’m thinking I might want to try to hide it from everyone ELSE ๐Ÿ˜‰

not sure if my DH would be able to keep it in from his family… but they are actually the reason I kinda want to keep it to just us. (there’s a lot of family drama about traditions etc that I want NO part of …and long story short if the baby is a surprise and he/she comes out and its like “ok this is newbaby(insert name)” then its over and done and no one can say SHYTE. hmmm….we’ll have to see I guess


Post # 50
2810 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

With DD we found out– I NEEDED to plan. I needed to decorate, I needed to know. lol

I’m pregnant with #2, and we are not finding out the sex this time. I am really excited to know on the day of delivery what we’re having.

I can see the pros and cons of both choice. It’s definitely more common here to find out–although most of the time you need to pay for a private ultrasound to find out– the techs who do your medical ultrasounds for your OB are not allowed to tell (although some will give you hints).

Post # 51
963 posts
Busy bee

I want to keep it a secret but DH doesn’t. We may have to compromise and one baby will be a surprise, another we’ll find out. 

Post # 52
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I am not preganant nor trying to be at the moment…. but, we have decided when we do have kids we want to be suprised… We have considered having my grandmother who has been in charge of secret baby genders in the past bc she doesnt like to be suprised be in charge of buying the things I want for either boy or girl for the nursery and she just give me the totals and I will pay her back that way I get to be suprised and decorate the nursery how I want without going green or yellows  <br />”Ill get to have my cake and eat it too”

Post # 53
4201 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - Canada

DH and I havent discussed this yet, but I have always said (and I’m sure i’ve said it around him) that its such a big moment for the daddy to walk out to the waiting room (lord knows, it’ll be packed when we’re there lol) and announce “It’s a BOY/GIRL”. I’ve also known a few people who planned for one gender and the baby came out the other gender. I don’t like secrets, and think that it might drive me nuts a little bit… I may make a hormonal decision when the time comes. But i also like the idea of having a nickname for the baby until their born, and I’d like gender neutral things anyways. So for now, I’ll say that we’d wait until the baby is born lol


Post # 54
2362 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - B&B

We are planning on keeping ours a surprise! For DH and I this is just more fun for us.

of course we have been very open to possible name choices so the name wont be a secret, it wilk just be a “is it Mike or Mary?!” (Not my name choices). My friend did a super cute gender announcement but I am ok with just doing a pregnancy announcement or something.

My nursery theme ideas are either woodland or seashore. I know, I should t even be thinking about it since we are like, a year and a half from TTC lol.

Post # 55
2652 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

In Ireland it’s actually way more common not to find out until the birth. The only friends I have that did find out had at least one member of the couple not from Ireland. I actually think I would like to know, to plan and to bond. I hope I can hold out from telling other people, though.

Post # 56
1060 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

DH and I are team green. both of our parents were team green through their pregnancies, and I’ve always grown up with the idea that I wouldn’t find out the gender until birth. I’m excited to have DH announce the gender to me, and I’m super curious to find out if my intuition is correct. I can see pros and cons with finding out or not, and don’t think one decision is better than the other, it’s whatever works best for the parents.

Post # 57
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

DH wants to know so that he can bond a bit with the baby, and I’m all for that! I always envisioned myself to be team green, but I’m also a planner and I think it  will be a bit of a relief to know and be able to prepare. 

Post # 58
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

We will be team green! There are several reasons why we don’t care to know the gender:

-It will cut down unwanted boy/girl clothes from family members

-it will cut down on the naming input from said family members

-we already have names picked out for either gender haha

-whether it’s a boy or girl it wouldn’t have an influence on how we decorate the nursery or even most of the clothes for that matter

-could be told the wrong gender. I’m sure it doesn’r happen too often, but just within my friends and families there are several that were told the wrong gender

-most important- we just really don’t care, we will be equally as happy with either sex

Post # 59
2319 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011


We are also keeping it a secret. DH doesn’t want to find out. I could go either way so I am going to respect his wishes and not find out. (I can’t keep a secret!) The nursery colours were not an issue for us. We were planning on using that room as an office and had painted it last summer with some nice, bright colours, ironically from the kids collection. Lol! (Hey! There’s a kid in all of us! :P)

As for clothing, well ‘onesies’ are going to be used for the next little while and I don’t particularly care what color they are.

Post # 60
3339 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

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almondjoy:  I wish that was an option for us, but my DH simply cannot keep anything a secret.  I know he’d end up telling me and everyone else, either on purpose or on accident.

For now, I’m Team Green and my DH still wants to know.  Maybe I’ll cave and want to find out too.  I dunno.  I think I want to find out during delivery because that’s what my parents did with me and my brother.  The delivering doctor knew the names it would be if it was a girl or boy, so when I was born he yelled, “IT’S CHRISTY!” instead of “It’s a girl!”  I just love this idea.  It feels special to me to do it the same way my mom did.

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