(Closed) Does anyone not celebrate anniversaries?

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
309 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Fiance and I don’t really celebrate them. Our relationship did not have a definite begin date because we met, hung out and then I left the country for a month. We might remember our engagement date this year and do something, but it’s pretty close to our wedding date and I’m sure money will be really tight. I’m guessing once we are married we’ll start to do things on our anniversary. To be honest, it’s not a huge deal to us.

Post # 4
Member
2227 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

We didn’t celebrate our wedding anniversary this year. We were just so busy between work & school that we had to postpone it indefinitely. ๐Ÿ™ Yep, we’re lame like that!

Post # 5
Member
409 posts
Helper bee

My husband and I dont really celebrate them. I’ve never been one to celebrate them though, i also dont do valentines day. 

Post # 7
Member
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

We aren’t really planning on celebrating anniversaries, although we’ll certainly acknowledge them with a “happy anniversary, babe” type thing and maybe a nice dinner. But this is a decision we are making together. We haven’t celebrated dating anniversaries while dating.

We have Christmas, his birthday in January, Valentine’s Day in February, my birthday in March, anniversary at the beginning of April. That is just TOO much, and we’re lucky enough that we already have everything we want or we go out and buy it.

So we are doing a $30 gift limit for Christmas and birthdays. Nothing for Valentine’s Day (although we tossed around the idea of making our tradition to order a heart-shaped pizza), and no gifts for anniversaries, but I still expect him to say “Happy Anniversary babe” and for us to talk about if we maybe want to go out ot eat.

We are planning on taking a vacation every winter in lieu of doing big gifts for those holidays, but honestly, we’d probably do that anyway. It’s just sort of what we’re telling ourselves/others because it’s a socially acceptable out for not doing big gifts for each other.

None of this is that helpful to you though – this is something we agreed on together and the deal can be changed at any time if one of us isn’t happy with it. The issue really isn’t anniversaries, the issue is you not feeling special. Have you told him extremely clearly you’d like to celebrate? Like straight up said, “Babe, it makes me feel very special when you say happy anniversary. Would you be willing to do that for me in the future? Have you made dinner reservations and said, “Babe, I made reservations at X for our anniversary” and he turned them down?

I had to be very explicitly clear with Fiance that I expect gifts for birthdays and Christmas to be wrapped. To me it was a “no duh” and to him he just didn’t know it mattered, but once I very clearly told him what I wanted, he was willing to do it. No hinting, straight, to-the-point, requests.

One other suggestion – read The 5 Love Languages and see if any of that hits on any of your challenges in this area. It is a GREAT read.

Post # 8
Member
358 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

We have a recognized anniversary, in fact, it’s today!  (13 years, whoo!)  We don’t really do anything to celebrate it, though.  Seems every year whatever we plan falls through (this year we were going to go snowshoeing, but Fiance decided that it would be too busy because of the long weekend).  Sometimes we go out for dinner or something, but it’s no big deal.

My SIL and her husband watch their  wedding video every year on their anniversary, and I can’t wait to be able to do that.

Post # 9
Member
2493 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

We make a habit of saying, “Happy anniversary”, but rarely actually DO anything to celebrate.

Post # 10
Member
1902 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

We never have (and never will) recognise/celebrate our meeting or dating anniversary. That just seems ludicrous to me – plus my fiance and I were friends for years and we gradually turned into a couple after about a year of hanging out as just friends, so it’d never work for us anyway.

We probably won’t really celebrate our wedding anniversary much either – we don’t get particularly sentimental about dates. Chances are we’ll probably just say “Happy anniversary” to each other, and that’s it.

Post # 11
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Ixtlali:  This, exactly. I figured out which date we met (since it was the first day of college) but we usually don’t do much. Once we were near a panda express so we made sure to eat there since we went all the time in college.

I think once we get married and have an actual date we might do more.

Post # 12
Member
4606 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

FH and I say ‘happy anniversary” and we might go out to dinner but we don’t do anything too special. There’s no gifts or anything like that. After we’re married, I know we won’t do anything for our dating anniversaries.

Post # 13
Member
10453 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

We don’t really do anything big. Maybe go out for dinner but it doesn’t necessarily happen that day. Just whenever works best. 

Post # 14
Member
945 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

We don’t. The timeline of the beginning of our relationship was confusing. And right around Christmas and FI’s birthday, so it’s just way too much all at once. Once we’re married we will though. It’ll be nice to have a proper anniversary.

Post # 15
Member
676 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

@MsGosling510:  Not yet, since like @Ixtlali:  we do not have a “real” start date to our relationship. I assume we will being celebrating our wedding anniversary next year. I am not big on that sort of thing; we do not do v-day, my b-day, etc. so we will see how the anniversary thing goes.

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